Desperately need help with wife and my gluten allergy.

[Stulos]

Hi. My name is Eric. I'm 48 and I have a mast cell condition and I'm allergic to a number of things but the biggest by far is wheat.

I'm not even positive if it's gluten or gliadin or another protein. What I do know though is that if I touch it, breathe it, or eat it then I have horrible symptoms. My belly protrudes out like I'm pregnant, I get rashes on my face and abdomen and chest, My muscles hurt really badly on my neck and face, I can't eat for a few days and my intestines feel like someone is stabbing me in the gut. I also get severe OCD symptoms.

I don't even care about the wheat anymore. I get it makes me sick so I don't want it and I feel great without it so to me it's a gift knowing it. The problem is that my wife will not accept it's real. If it's in the house I get really sick but it hasn't been in the house so that's ok. It has been in the car that I drive to the store sometimes but I can't anymore. I tried to get her to not use wheat in the car but she said that's wrong and won't do it so I capitulated and got some wipes and asked her to please just wipe the steering wheel down and maybe the seat when she's done. Just like a 20 second wipe should do it.

She says I can clean it myself and that's what everyone does and I'm acting more fragile than I really am. She in the past has even called me a baby about not wiping it up myself. I've cleaned up and wiped up wheat a number of times. I usually get sick. It's a hair trigger reaction.

She says that I can't get sick from just touching it. That even if I do get sick it will be a localized skin reaction and nothing more. I have sent her articles showing that you can get an anaphalictic reaction from touching it if you have that type of allergy. I have sent her a medical case study showing that is a thing, including someone with basically my symptoms, including the OCD. My immunologist actually told me that wheat can cause OCD and told me not to touch it. She says he didn't say that but he did. I have a hematologist, internal medicine doctor and an immunologist saying that I should not touch it because of the nature of the allergy. Basically mechanically it's like a peanut of wheat allergy.

She just won't buy it. She keeps saying that I'm actually just using it to control her, which I can't even understand. I'm definitely not. It's just when I touch it I get sick. I mean a little bit of touch it. If I touch a wrapper that had wheat in it, if I touch a doorknob someone just grabbed with wheat dust all over their hands. If I literally just smell someone cooking pasta. It's a hair trigger allergy.

You can see the symptoms when they happen but she says the rashes and messed up stomach and muscle pain and stabbing intestines are just from anxeity because I get mad when I can't control her.

What's really weird is that she is the one who figured out that wheat was doing that to me. I didn't even believe her at first until she threatened me if I didn't stop eating wheat. It came from her and then she just flipped.

I got desperate today and had the idea that I would video record myself touching a wrapper and then video document all the symptoms you can see on my body. I told her I was going to show her it was true. She said that "wouldn't prove anything except I was stupid and made myself sick" and simultaniously told me that touching it can't make me sick.

All I'm asking is for her to just do a simple wipe down so that I can be safe using the car to go to the store if I need to. Am I wrong for that? She says I am and it's controlling and borderline but I just can't see how. It doesn't make sense to me. Can someone please help me with some insight here? This is really hard on me. It's mad anxeity inducing and I also get really ill for days. What's interesting is when I get anxious from it she says all the symptoms just come from the anxiety so that doesn't prove anything anyway.

How do I get her to see that I'm telling the truth. My desperation move was to make a video and prove it but she just told me that won't prove anything so that won't work.

She did wipe it for a week or so and I was so relieved but when she saw I was happy it turned into me using it to control her and it doesn't make me sick like that and it's impossible.

I've sent her so much proof that allergies can present that way. I'm at my wits end. It's a fight that is really unfair to me. I can't just change my mind and say it doesn't make me sick, because it does. I don't even tell her when I'm sick anymore because it makes her mad and she tells me it's all in my head and it's borderline controlling and manipulation. It isn't remotely that though. This is really hard and I have no idea what to say anymore. The conversations don't reflect the reality of it. It's really stressful. Then I'm told that's my problem is I'm stressed and mad and that's where all the symptoms come from. What do I do? It's a severe allergy.

My doctor said it's not celiacs, it's a straight up allergy. He thinks it's from me having a succeptibility and then baking and exposing myself a lot and it created the allergy like bakers asthma, which seems reasonable.

How do I get cooperation about this though? I need it desperately. I'm not trying to control anyone. She does what she wants more than anyone I know with a family and I don't try to stop her. I don't understand. I really don't.

I just want to not be sick. It lasts 3 to 4 days and it's torture and hell. I'm being honest and telling it like it is and you can even see it. That's why I was going to record the video but she said that's stupid and won't prove anything so what will? She's seen the rashes, she can't see the stomach pain or intesting or muscle pain but she can see the rashes and she can see that I'm sick and struggling but it's just turned into anxiety. And yeah, there's anxiety for sure. It's really hard but those symptoms don't come from that. They come from one thing. Wheat exposure. My kids know it. My friends. My doctors. How do I get her to know it?

Sorry I wrote so much. I'm honestly not even gonna proofread it. It's too stressful to go over again. I hope someone who has experienced it can give me some idea. I don't think she's bad. I think she's mentally gone down a road that isn't true and can't see her way out of it. Please help.

[trents]

Welcome to the forum, Eric!

First, I need to let you know that celiac disease and NCGS (Non Celiac Gluten Sensitivity) are not allergies. The immune system pathway for NCGS is not well-established yet but we do know that celiac disease is an autoimmune disorder. So, I'm not sure this is the appropriate place to address your allergies. But that raises the question, have you ever been specifically tested for celiac disease? Some of your symptoms align with those we typically see with celiac disease. There are specific tests designed to detect the presence of the antibodies produced by celiac disease. There is no test for NCGS but a diagnosis of NCGS is arrived at through first ruling out celiac disease since they share many of the same symptoms. NCGS is 10x more common than celiac disease. So I think you should be tested for celiac disease if you have not been. MCAS (Mast Cell Activation Syndrome) is common among celiacs by the way. What are you doing to address your MCAS?

It sounds like there is big trust issue between you and your wife. From your narrative it seems this might be the biggest issue right now. Have the two of you looked into marriage counseling?

[Stulos]

Hi. Thanks for answering. None of my "allergies" fit cleanly it doesn't seem. I have tested chemical allergies but when my immunologist tested celiacs it was negative. He said that doesn't mean it's not happening and just avoid it. 

I guess it's a trust issue on her end. She thinks I'm manipulating and controlling but I'm not doing that honestly. She won't do marriage counseling but I agree it's needed.

As far as addressing my MCAS I avoid the chemicals I'm allergic to, eat a clean diet and avoid things I'm allergic to there. I take low dose naltrexone because it seems to help some with the chemical reactions.

As long as I don't expose myself to what triggers it I'm perfectly healthy. Not one symptom I get isn't related to it. They all poof dissapear when I'm not exposed. 

Chemicals used to be an issue but we got through that and what we use is safe and works fine so that isn't an issue anymore. Wheat is an even worse, more hairtrigger one than the chemical one.

I agree with you it's a trust issue. But I'm not sure what to do with it. That is how she's filtering everything I do and say like I'm manipulating and controlling and I'm not doing that and saying I'm not doing that to her just seems to confirm to her that I really am. 

That hurts and is really hard but where it manifests in a really destructive way is with the wheat exposure and before that with the chemical exposure. 

I just have no idea what to do when I'm being honest and going to her with loving intentions and really just asking for simple cooperation in this case. She goes along with it for a week or so and then it turns into me being controlling. I think it's because of my relief and happiness when she cooperates with it. It seems to make her think I'm happy because I got away with manipulating her but it's simply not true. I'm happy because it's not a fight and I don't have to stay on high alert and be sick periodically. Control has not one thing to do with it. I'm ok with the wheat being in the car. I just can't clean it up.

[trents]

Have you tried 2nd generation antihistamines for the MCAS?

[Stulos]

I take 20 mg of pepcid and claritin twice a day but I really only need it during allergy seasons because I have outdoor allergies. They manifest weird too.

The wheat problem doesn't change with the claritin and pepcid though. Chemicals either. It only helps with the outdoor stuff but since it all feeds each other it helps a lot.

I was also on Cromolyn but it didn't affect a lot really. My immunologist might have been giving up on it but he said there really isn't more medicine for it. Mostly it's don't be exposed to what causes the reaction.

It gets severe. At its worst I couldn't talk. I was stuttering. My entire body was jerking randomly. Then I would also have myoclonic (sp?) jerks. I coudn't get off of the ground for 6 months. My poop turned snow white and urine dark cola color. I can't walk properly like miastenia gravis (sp? again) Like I will stumble like I'm drunk into doors.  There is so many more really severe symptoms. It damn near killed me and that isn't an understatement. It made me have a cardiac event. Broke the tendons and ligaments on one side of my body. It's a lot.

It also causes me to be amped up because my body seems to react to it by releasing tons of adrenaline. My immunologist thinks that is my body trying to stabilize the immune reaction.

Back then it was hard because I was a mess. We knew not to do it though and just like the wheat the chemicals became a power struggle and she was saying the same things then. That it's not real. I'm just borderline and the symptoms are caused by anxiety.

She doesn't do or say that about chemicals anymore. It's just wheat now. She also says it when there's a disagreement. It's like she is trying to keep me in that sick box and it hurts bad. 

None of those severe symptoms are here anymore because the chemicals got dealt with and I'm not constantly in that reactive state. It's really hard to have the same power struggle and fight and hear the same things as when I was in that shape from chemicals and wheat. Back then she was bringing wheat into the house too.

It's like we didn't learn anything from doing it wrong. Well I think I did. She's still saying the same stuff though. Just about half of what it used to be. I don't understand it. She saw me get so much better. She sees what I'm like when I'm not exposed. When she's nice and happy she will even say it. But when she's upset it all turns back to that and I can't help getting sick. I really can't.

I'm really cooperative too. If she wants to do things a certain way I really try to. The only thing I can't help is the allergies.

[knitty kitty]

@Stulos,

I understand completely!  My whole family has been that way.

I had a genetic test done to prove it.  They still say they don't have it (but have big bloated bellies). 

You should get genetic testing done to see if you carry any genes for Celiac.  Your symptoms certainly sound like Celiac.  Mast Cell Activation Syndrome goes along with Celiac, as does Sulfa Hypersensitivity Type Four.  I have this and react to chemicals like you.  Many chemicals and fragrances contain sulfur based components that trigger this reaction.  

If anything, your wife is manipulating YOU.  She's feeding off being able to emotionally distress you.  Look up Dr. Les Carter and Richard Grannon and "narcissistic personality disorder" on YouTube.  My EX-fiance did the same *%¢##*% thing.  It's NOT you.

Get checked for vitamin and mineral deficiencies.  Vitamin D can help calm the immune system response.  The B Complex vitamins, especially Thiamine and B12, can help your body get rid of histamine.  

Best wishes, babe.  Hang in there!  

[Stulos]

Hi knitty kitty. I actually think you are right after what just happened.

I just tried to talk to her one more time and just said "I'm cool with it being there. I just can't clean it up. It's fair to not make me and just wipe it sometimes for 20 seconds. I'm cooperating with everything. That it's cool to have the wheat in the car.

She said that's just me still telling her what she has to do and I can go clean it. I said I just won't use the car and gave up and she told me I needed psychological help.

She told me that I'm fragile but I don't have to be. That she sees what it really is. That I'm an adult and can clean something up. That she doesn't believe me. That it is a power struggle. Just straight up verbally spoken out loud and saying it like it was obvious that of course it was a power struggle. 

She said a number of times that I'm being fragile. That's her new word to repeat. She has actually used baby before instead of fragile about that exact issue. Cleaning wheat out of the car so I can use it.

She keeps saying it and I think it's because she can tell it hurts me. She even leaned into it once I finally asked her not to call me fragile. I'm not anyway. I've beaten some really intense things asd didn't get bitter or resentful.

It was upsetting and you could see I was upset but I wasn't yelling or cussing or anything wrong and she said that if I get that upset about anything she does that means that I need help.

She was talking really loudly about how messed up I am while our son was walking down the hall and wouldn't stop when she heard him and I walked away. They have been hurt by that stupid argument already. Two other kids were hurt by it when she did it the other day. And that time everyone was so happy. Then boom. 

I got frustrated and said to her that we need a family meeting because this hurts them and me, and really ultimately her, it's not right and we need to decide how people treat each other in our family but she said don't involve the kids, which I suppose is right except they get involved by seeing it when she does that. 

Speaking of the kids. All of them are understanding and great and wouldn't think of making me sick on purpose like that. They understand and are awesome and it's literally never a point of friction. I'm not going to say anything to them. That was really a desperation statement but it does hurt them when she says that stuff about me in front of them. My friend said that she's trying to make their dad look like a bad crazy person and it does seem there is some truth in that. She seems to think I am. I'm not doing anything wrong though.

She said she wants proof from a doctor that I'm that I'm so "fragile I can't wipe out a car"

It was the ugliest, most exposing of a personality conversation I've ever had. I'm actually shocked. I can't believe the person I just talked to is Michelle. I came to her calmly and cooperatively and with good intentions. Fair intentions. I'm literally shaking right now. I'm sorry. I'm saying too much. I shouldn't have posted here right after that. I'm just not going to use the car and she can say I'm crazy and that I need help but I know I'm not.

Thanks for the kind words. I feel bad posting all this. I'm pretty stressed right now. I'm sorry.

I will get vitamin levels checked again. They were low at my sickest. That's a good idea. Thanks.

[trents]

Eric, it sounds like your wife could use counseling but if she won't go it would probably be of help for you to be able to tell these things you are sharing with us to a professional counselor, someone who is a skilled listener and someone who can help you strategize in finding the best ways to cope with this situation. Do you believe your OCD figures into all of this?

[Stulos]

I think I should. I've tried but with my insurance nobody here has openings. The OCD doesn't at all. When I don't ingest gluten it dissapears completely. The only way it comes into play is it comes raging back when I am exposed to wheat which is a lot of why I try to avoid it. It's miserable. 

[trents]

One thing you should know is that getting accurate testing done for celiac disease depends on regular consumption of gluten. The testing looks for the antibodies produced by celiac inflammation of the small bowel lining in response to gluten ingestion over time. The Mayo Clinic guidelines for a pretest gluten challenge are the daily consumption of two slices of wheat bread (or the gluten equivalent) for 6 to 8 weeks leading up to the blood draw. I share that because it sounds like you may have been avoiding wheat when you had the celiac testing done. Some people's reaction to gluten is so severe they cannot do the gluten challenge so they just begin the gluten free lifestyle and must live with the ambiguity of not knowing if they have celiac disease or NCGS. It might also interest you to know that we have forum participants that report they get a gluten reaction just by walking down the bread isle at the supermarket and smelling the bread aroma.

[knitty kitty]

Don't feel bad about venting your frustration!  What you're asking is understandable and justifiable.

Never mind about couples counseling.  Get some counseling for yourself.  You need a safe person to vent to, one that can give you tools to cope with this.  Take the kids, too.  This is stressful and damaging to them, too.  Not a good example for one parent to set.  What if one of those kids were sick like you?  She wouldn't talk to them like that.  Or would she?  I'm sure the kids worry about that, too.

I'm sure even if you wore a hazmat suit and cleaned up the car yourself, she would still find something to belittle about you.  She's got insecurities she's not dealing with and projecting it onto you to make herself feel better.  Sad.  

You talk to the kids.  Make sure they know their support is appreciated by you and confirm that they are emotionally okay.  (What narcissistic parents do to their kids is awful!)  

Try not to get pulled into discussions about your allergies.  Go "Gray Rock".  Be as interesting as a rock in the garden.  Boring.  Don't justify, don't explain, don't get drawn into an argument about your allergies.  Don't give her ammunition.  It's very hard not to react when someone is continually stirring the pot intentionally.  But do try.  It takes two to argue, and if you don't participate, she's left looking foolish.  And she'll feel it.  

But, do get counseling from a minister or health professional.  There's also the phone number 988 for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline.  They'll listen if you have a crisis and get really shook up again.  Better Help offers online counseling.  And we're always here for non-professional help, a shoulder to lean on.  You can personal-message us through the forum here.  

Do consider getting genetic testing for Celiac Disease.  I couldn't complete the Gluten Challenge because I am one of those people who react to walking down the bread aisle (and the laundry detergent - home cleaning products aisles).

We're on your side.  You are strong enough to get through this challenge.  {{{Hugs}}}

[Stulos]

It's good advice. Thanks for that and the kindness. 

That's really good to know about eating wheat for the test. I didn't know that. There is no way I could get through that so I guess I can't be tested like that. Which is really ok with me because I know it hurts me either way so I don't need it really.

I'm one of those people too. I can't walk down a bread or fragrance aisle. Weirdly enough white bread is much worse when I'm standing near it. Either way it gets bad fast. 

You hit on the other thing that has been so painful I didn't mention. Multiple kids do have reactions to things. Weirdly she discovered them and used to protect them using Feingold diet until she changed her mind. 

Multiple kids have the same symptoms and have even said foods hurt them. Like my daughter has said and fought for not eating things that hurt her and you can see she is sick. It's not easy to miss. Michelle tries to get her to eat it relentlessly and tells me that I'm creating an eating disorder and making her scared to eat but I'm listening to her and seeing that it matches her experience. That's been really hard too to see them sick and have that be made a fight. 

[trents]

43 minutes ago, Stulos said:

I think I should. I've tried but with my insurance nobody here has openings. The OCD doesn't at all. When I don't ingest gluten it dissapears completely. The only way it comes into play is it comes raging back when I am exposed to wheat which is a lot of why I try to avoid it. It's miserable. 

I was asking about the part played by your OCD not only in reference to your reaction to wheat but to how your wife reacts to you in all of this. I assume she knows about your OCD. Does she automatically assume this is the real issue when you report a reaction to wheat, i.e., she sees this in a monolithic way as a mental health issue?

Edited June 13, 2023 by trents

[knitty kitty]

Celiac is genetic, so opting for genetic tests all around may be beneficial. Especially for your daughter.  I know how she feels from my own experience of being put in that position.  You're being a good dad.  Kudos! 

I would not be surprised if Michelle had Celiac herself and is in staunch denial.  

(Celiac can cause vitamin deficiencies.  Some vitamin deficiencies can make a person really irritable.  Thiamine and Niacin especially.  You've heard the expression "a mean drunk"....Thiamine and Niacin are notoriously low in alcoholics.  In fact, Thiamine deficiency has been linked to increased violence.)

If the kids are positive for Celiac, then not following a gluten free diet could be considered "denial of medical care" which is child abuse.  Just saying.  

You're on the best path forward.  You're doing right.  You're doing good.  

[Stulos]

I see what you mean about the OCD Trents. Borderline seems to be the monolith thing she thinks. She actually seems to believe that I don't have OCD until I'm exposed. It's really confusing. 

Borderline is what she filters everything through though. She is always thinking I'm manipulating and controlling and uses the term. She had stopped using it for a while but when things are stressfull it's how she defines me. 

I'm not sure Knitty Kitty. I do remember once when she started to eat fast food she said it made her anxious and angry and impatient with people and it does seem like things do that to her sometimes but I really have no idea if that's true for sure. 

It's not just celiacs with the kids. I'm honestly not even sure it's wheat. Colors and MSG and nitrates for sure with some of them. I'm really not sure about wheat at all. I've not tried to really limit wheat with them as much because I don't want to put my stuff on them in case it's not a problem. It does need to be tested. I have wanted to get them to a doctor. 

Me and my daughter did a 23 and me and both came back for high risk of wheat allergy. Hers was 3 times higher than mine but I don't know.

I am trying to be fair and get it right. I'm trying to be fair and cooperative and not holding grudges with Michelle either because I know it's been hard but some things I have to stand up to but doesn't work when I do.

[knitty kitty]

To get inflammation down, try the Autoimmune Protocol Diet.  This diet works if you have Mast Cell Activation Syndrome.

 

[Stulos]

That list you sent is really close to how I eat. The only real differences is I can handle some beans and nuts and sugar doesn't seem to do much to me if I just eat a little of it.

That's really close to it though. I eat chicken mostly that is natural, vegetables, fruit, some nuts, I can eat some rice but not a lot. It took forever to figure out what hurt me and didn't. I went down to no foods at my sickest and tested them all one by one to finally get a good map.

It makes me feel so much better but it's also cool the positive benefits. I was fat and now you can see my muscles in my abs and I barely exercise. I can't because I get an exercise induced asthma like thing. Eating right makes such a ridiculous difference. It really surprised me when I saw how much. 

[knitty kitty]

Yes, I add in those same things occasionally.  It really helps control my type two diabetes.  I had Metabolic Syndrome before I started the AIP diet and my body composition has changed, too.  It's great, but the AIP diet can be low in some nutrients.  Consider supplementing with a good B Complex, Vitamin D (calms the immune system) and Benfotiamine (a form of thiamine that helps reduce inflammation).

Sailors' asthma is a sign of Thiamine insufficiency.  It can happen during exercise when lots of Thiamine is being used.

Found some reading material for you...

The effects of endurance training and thiamine supplementation on anti-fatigue during exercise

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4241913/

And...

Children with celiac disease express inducible nitric oxide synthase in the small intestine during gluten challenge

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/9759949/

And...

Food additives can act as triggering factors in celiac disease: Current knowledge based on a critical review of the literature

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6509268/

And...

Food in Chronic Pain: Friend or Foe?

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7469060/

And...

Worldwide flavor enhancer monosodium glutamate combined with high lipid diet provokes metabolic alterations and systemic anomalies: An overview

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8120859/

 

Edited June 13, 2023 by knitty kitty
Typo

[Stulos]

I really appreciate those links. They look helpful. I wouldn't be surprised at all if I have nutrient deficiencies. I'm glad you mentioned that. I do need to get that tested again as soon as possible. 

[shadycharacter]

1 hour ago, Stulos said:

I see what you mean about the OCD Trents. Borderline seems to be the monolith thing she thinks. She actually seems to believe that I don't have OCD until I'm exposed. It's really confusing. 

Borderline is what she filters everything through though. She is always thinking I'm manipulating and controlling and uses the term. She had stopped using it for a while but when things are stressfull it's how she defines me. 

I'm not sure Knitty Kitty. I do remember once when she started to eat fast food she said it made her anxious and angry and impatient with people and it does seem like things do that to her sometimes but I really have no idea if that's true for sure. 

It's not just celiacs with the kids. I'm honestly not even sure it's wheat. Colors and MSG and nitrates for sure with some of them. I'm really not sure about wheat at all. I've not tried to really limit wheat with them as much because I don't want to put my stuff on them in case it's not a problem. It does need to be tested. I have wanted to get them to a doctor. 

Me and my daughter did a 23 and me and both came back for high risk of wheat allergy. Hers was 3 times higher than mine but I don't know.

I am trying to be fair and get it right. I'm trying to be fair and cooperative and not holding grudges with Michelle either because I know it's been hard but some things I have to stand up to but doesn't work when I do.

I'm so sorry reading about your situation. To me it sounds as if your wife is gaslighting you. 

[Rogol72]

The emotional stress alone from dealing with such a situation will severely deplete vitamin and mineral status beyond gluten free or AIP diet. I sincerely hope your situation will get better as soon as possible. 

[knitty kitty]

@Rogol72 is right.  

Not only do people eating fast food develop nutritional deficiencies, emotional stress can drain our own reserves of vitamins and minerals.  

A good B Complex and some extra thiamine as benfotiamine can help us deal with stress better.

https://www.lifeextension.com/vitamins-supplements/item01945/bioactive-complete-b-complex?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIxZ66wPX__gIVZnJMCh0MvA6HEAQYAyABEgK-x_D_BwE

And...

https://www.lifeextension.com/search#q=mega benfotiamine&t=coveo4A2453FD

 

Edited June 13, 2023 by knitty kitty
Add link and information

[ravenwoodglass]

So sorry that you are going through all this. It sounds like your wife is the main problem right now and you are right to be fearful that she is doing harm not just to you but also to your children. Has she ever gone to a doctors appointment with you or can you get your records to show her (if she would even read them)?  Is there any safe place where you and the kids can take a 'break' from this abuse?

[shadycharacter]

8 hours ago, Stulos said:

I see what you mean about the OCD Trents. Borderline seems to be the monolith thing she thinks. She actually seems to believe that I don't have OCD until I'm exposed. It's really confusing. 

Borderline is what she filters everything through though. She is always thinking I'm manipulating and controlling and uses the term. She had stopped using it for a while but when things are stressfull it's how she defines me. 

 

If your wife claims you're borderline, keep in mind that:

1. She doesn't have the formal qualifications to diagnose you (I assume).

2. She hasn't conducted a professional examination.

3. Even if she had, she's too close as your spouse to do that.

So please don't start doubting yourself based on what she calls you. There's no reason to call you borderline. You're asking her to take reasonable measures to prevent you from getting ill. 

 

[shadycharacter]

11 hours ago, Stulos said:

It's good advice. Thanks for that and the kindness. 

That's really good to know about eating wheat for the test. I didn't know that. There is no way I could get through that so I guess I can't be tested like that. Which is really ok with me because I know it hurts me either way so I don't need it really.

I'm one of those people too. I can't walk down a bread or fragrance aisle. Weirdly enough white bread is much worse when I'm standing near it. Either way it gets bad fast. 

You hit on the other thing that has been so painful I didn't mention. Multiple kids do have reactions to things. Weirdly she discovered them and used to protect them using Feingold diet until she changed her mind. 

Multiple kids have the same symptoms and have even said foods hurt them. Like my daughter has said and fought for not eating things that hurt her and you can see she is sick. It's not easy to miss. Michelle tries to get her to eat it relentlessly and tells me that I'm creating an eating disorder and making her scared to eat but I'm listening to her and seeing that it matches her experience. That's been really hard too to see them sick and have that be made a fight. 

Do you eat rye and/or barley? They too contain gluten, though not as much as wheat. Perhaps they could be used for a gluten challenge ? The downside is the risk for cross contamination and allergic cross reactivity with wheat.