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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

TriticusToxicum

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jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
Did I ever tell you guys that in my "letter of application" (I use that term loosely) for my preschool position, I informed the director that I don't gag at the smell (or sound)of vomit? I'm pretty sure that's why I got the job.

:lol: :lol: :lol: They surely took this bit of information into pserious consideration!

Silver lining on an otherwise crappy evening,

I bid on and won a romantic trip for 2 to Victoria BC to stay at the Fairmont Empress!! Think I should take the hubby or find someone worthy of a romantic weekend?? ;)

Wow! I guess you should take hubby since he's the one who strong-armed you into going in the phirst place :D

y could result in poop up to his shoulders??? ..... always after weetabix....funny that :lol:

But seriously, those events would have turned the HARDEST of stomachs :o

Operation 'school reunion in grotty pub must-look-fab-it's-so-stressful' this afternoon,

Hold me :unsure: .........skird!

Have a wonnerphul time, Nik!! :D

Morning Psillies. Cinnamon rolls are rising. They shall be ready in about 1 1/2 hours. That should be plenty of time for you all to get here. I shall expect you shortly.

OMG <droolphace> Be right over! :rolleyes:

....1.30pm on a Sun afternoon and I've got a vodka & coke in me hand :blink::lol:

That's our goil :lol: A wee drink will take the edge off ;)

I gotta finish insulating the kitchen today, having committed to the dry wall guy coming next week. I'm just not a fan of anything involving actual labor. Would much rather supervise.....by phone.......from a distant, more pleasant place......with a drink in my hand.....

Jess does nae want to get her hands dirty :lol: Not that I blame her.....can't wait to see pics after the walls are up.

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celiac-mommy Collaborator
celiac-mommy
Posted
I'll go! You can pick me up on your way to the boat. I'm not terribly romantic tho'. Too practical for that foolishness.

I think we are going to go to Seattle a day early since we have to catch the ferry at 8am, maybe we could meet for lunch or something??!! Not sure how often you get into Seattle...

In light of how you've been thinking of hubby of late....I think you need to take some psillies with you instead!!! May not be so romantic...but would be one hail of a great time!!!

Me thinks you are right!!!

Ra-shellle! You will LOVE it there - - Verrrrrry posh and old-style elegant - -while I was out there last month, my mom, sis and I wandered in and had "high tea" there in one of the incredible restaurants on the first floor. Mountains right in front of you, a quiet piano playing in the marble foyer.. . .. ...And Vicoria is one of the loveliest cities I've been in, methinks. Take heed - - lots of seniors. Ya cannot be in a huge hurry to get anywhere - -cavalcades of walkers, canes and big station wagons cruising at 20 mph...........

Yeah, We get a gold room, so we have the high tea, our own consierge (sp?), complimentary cocktails and canapes nightly and an extensive continental breakfast in the "exclusive" gold room lounge. It sounds like it's a VIP thing and the "regular room" peeps are not allowed :o;)

Wow! I guess you should take hubby since he's the one who strong-armed you into going in the phirst place :D

I think I will not have a choice in the matter. But he was busy schmoozing and I was left to my own devices at the table. The item came up and I started bidding. I was concerned because 1 day of snowmobiling went for $900, and I wasn't going to pay that much!! With our tax write off, we got a 650$ trip for 340$!!! And I think since it was the last item, everyone else was bidded out ;) But I told y'all I was a bargain shopper!! :D

celiac-mommy Collaborator
celiac-mommy
Posted
Operation 'school reunion in grotty pub must-look-fab-it's-so-stressful' this afternoon,

Hold me :unsure: .........skird!

Have soooooo much fun!!!

It's an un-landscaping day today. I trimmed back bushes yesterday and started pulling out three burning bushes . . . gah!!!!! . . . they are in a spot MUCH too small for them (like just about everything else in this yard). I might have to actually pay someone to dig these out, the roots are so intertwined and there is no manuevering room to get leverage on these puppies. I took out a 12 foot tree (including the root ball) by myself that was much easier than one of these bushes!!! Suze, when you come for your cinnamon rolls, bring me some of yer muskle relaxers!

Wow, you're amazing, like Paul Bunyun!! I gave my hubby 1 job at our house--take care of our small yard and I will take care of the 3600 square ft and everything inside.....He hired Jesus and his crew to take care of the yard-that was his way of being responsible for it <_< I thought-if you can do it, so can I, so I hired Viola to help me with the house but she only comes every other Wednesday :( He doesn't want to pay her for every week....boohoo :rolleyes:

I gotta finish insulating the kitchen today, having committed to the dry wall guy coming next week. I'm just not a fan of anything involving actual labor. Would much rather supervise.....by phone.......from a distant, more pleasant place......with a drink in my hand.....

Let me know when you're ready to paint-I'm good with a paintbrush!! :)

Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted
Let me know when you're ready to paint-I'm good with a paintbrush!! :)

ooohh . . . me too . . . I'm slow but careful . . . Paintin' Partay at Jess'!!!!! . . . and yes Jess, you must come, too . . . no putting us on a speaker phone to talk to you whilst we paint your kitchen!!!!

ranger Enthusiast
ranger
Posted

Just a poop in. God, I miss talking about poop and vomit, not having to worry bout spellin and "Perfect English" and being uncerimonially un civilized! My computer crashed and I can't afford a new one. Just wanted to thank you all for the many times you've lifted my spirits. Hope to poop in now and then, but access is hard now. You all sound so good and I miss ya!

Sleezen :unsure:

Jestgar Rising Star
Jestgar
Posted
Just a poop in. God, I miss talking about poop and vomit, not having to worry bout spellin and "Perfect English" and being uncerimonially un civilized! My computer crashed and I can't afford a new one. Just wanted to thank you all for the many times you've lifted my spirits. Hope to poop in now and then, but access is hard now. You all sound so good and I miss ya!

Sleezen :unsure:

POUTY FACE!!

We must figure a way around your isolation!

Library?

Mug a businessman for his blackberry?

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

SLOOOOOOOZINSKARONI!! :):) Great to read you.....indeed, how you have been missed. Yes, library! It is where I race when I'm offline at home. Get thee to la bibliotheque!!

I think we are going to go to Seattle a day early since we have to catch the ferry at 8am, maybe we could meet for lunch or something??!! Not sure how often you get into Seattle...

Gah! A West-coast Psummit!! :)

Yeah, We get a gold room, so we have the high tea, our own consierge (sp?), complimentary cocktails and canapes nightly and an extensive continental breakfast in the "exclusive" gold room lounge. It sounds like it's a VIP thing and the "regular room" peeps are not allowed

Mygawd......I believe I saw the people who stay in these highly exclusive wings of the hotel, as we sat sipping our $32.00 pot of tea :blink: .. . .......they wandered past, not inclined to take in our obvious tourist-y, wide-eyed and wondrous demeanor. Um, my foot (the injured one) was bothering me, so I unhooked my sandal, then the other one, and sat with bare feet. Now HOW on EARTH would anyone notice this, as my feet were tucked under the table, completely obliterated by an exquisite gold and muslin brocade cloth?? Dunno, but they did - - 'twas quite a heinosity for the peeps strolling by, I'm sure..... . whispering, subtly pointing. . ........ :rolleyes::lol:

I gave my hubby 1 job at our house--take care of our small yard and I will take care of the 3600 square ft and everything inside.....He hired Jesus and his crew to take care of the yard-

Gah!! Jesus is taking care of your yard? Is he a good worker? I thought he was a carpenter... ...does he rip up shrubs and cut back hedges?

Didn't he create a burning bush at some point?

Or did he put one out?

Or appear in front of one.. . .. ...proclaiming it a miracle.......? :huh:

Crap, I need Jesus here to build me a new picnic table....... . . .and turn quite a bit of tap water into wine.. . ......now THAT is one request that he must hear ad nauseum. "Sorry, I just cannot be doing that anymore.... . ....you must go forth, and buy your wine".... ..

:lol:

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nikki-uk Enthusiast
nikki-uk
Posted

:lol::lol:

Evening all!!!!!!

SO much I wanted to comment on ...... but am too inebriated ;)

Suffice to say I survived the afternoon, t'was quite awwwwwkwarrrd at first, with only TWO other peeps being apparent (would NOT have recognised 'em..only I heard them ask at the bar if anyone else had turned up for the 'school reunion' :rolleyes: )

HOLY HECk!!!.... Thought I was stuck wiv 'em (they were NOT 'my people' :lol: )....'til some goilz from my class turned up

:lol:

:lol:

..am drunk :wacko:

...what a LARPH!!!!! :lol: ...tears were steaming down me phace remembering some o' the high jinx antics :ph34r:

<need to lie down now>

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted
<need to lie down now>

Drunkard Nik!! :lol:

Surely you must have a vomit/poop story to recount for us.. . .......not yet, I suppose....... . . . . .in a few hours -- likely. :lol:

Just DON'T BARF IN YER BEDSIDE TABLE DRAWER!

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
Yeah, We get a gold room, so we have the high tea, our own consierge (sp?), complimentary cocktails and canapes nightly and an extensive continental breakfast in the "exclusive" gold room lounge. It sounds like it's a VIP thing and the "regular room" peeps are not allowed :o;)

Sounds quite cosmopolitan B):D

. . . Paintin' Partay at Jess'!!!!! . . . and yes Jess, you must come, too . . . no putting us on a speaker phone to talk to you whilst we paint your kitchen!!!!

....wif a glass of sumpin good in yer hand :lol: Paintin par-tay sounds like phun!!

Just a poop in. God, I miss talking about poop and vomit, not having to worry bout spellin and "Perfect English" and being uncerimonially un civilized! My computer crashed and I can't afford a new one. Just wanted to thank you all for the many times you've lifted my spirits. Hope to poop in now and then, but access is hard now. You all sound so good and I miss ya!

Sleezola!!! Good to hear from you :D We miss you too--hope you can finagle a connection from time to time to be wif us. I'm sending good thoughts yer way ;)

:lol::lol:

Evening all!!!!!!

SO much I wanted to comment on ...... but am too inebriated ;)

Yea!! Nik had a phun time and is drunk to boot! :lol: Will wait till the ice bag comes off yer 'ead to hear the stories :P I'm really glad you had a good time :D

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
Just DON'T BARF IN YER BEDSIDE TABLE DRAWER!

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted

Three gianormous craters in the ground. Three decimated bushes strung about me walkway. Too tired to clean it up now and plus I still need to pare down the root balls as the bushes are too heavy to lift. We'll see in the next few days if the back goes out . . . that's what usually happens. I over do it one day (back's just a wee sore) and then one or two days later, I turn wrong or too fast or reach for something and out it goes . . . the clock is running. Broke the pitch fork trying to leverage one of 'em out of it's hole. Gah, what a mess, but the worse part is over.

Sloozen - so sorry to hear that you are now in a forumless abyss!! You must find yer way back to us!!!

Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted
Gah!! Jesus is taking care of your yard? Is he a good worker? I thought he was a carpenter... ...does he rip up shrubs and cut back hedges?

Didn't he create a burning bush at some point?

That was his Dad.

Or did he put pull one out?
That was me and actually, it was three bushes.

Crap, I need Jesus here to build me a new picnic table....... . . .and turn quite a bit of tap water into wine.. . ......now THAT is one request that he must hear ad nauseum. "Sorry, I just cannot be doing that anymore.... . ....you must go forth, and buy your wine".... ..

Yep, that's exactly why he got out of that water-to-wine business, Emily people kept badgering him for more wine.

celiac-mommy Collaborator
celiac-mommy
Posted
Well done YOU!!! :D

Take this

Open Original Shared Link

*giggle*

How in the heck did I miss this earlier? You're the best! Here's one for you.... :D

http://www.filmgrenade.com/wp-content/uplo...nd-edward12.webp

Mygawd......I believe I saw the people who stay in these highly exclusive wings of the hotel, as we sat sipping our $32.00 pot of tea :blink: .. . .......they wandered past, not inclined to take in our obvious tourist-y, wide-eyed and wondrous demeanor. Um, my foot (the injured one) was bothering me, so I unhooked my sandal, then the other one, and sat with bare feet. Now HOW on EARTH would anyone notice this, as my feet were tucked under the table, completely obliterated by an exquisite gold and muslin brocade cloth?? Dunno, but they did - - 'twas quite a heinosity for the peeps strolling by, I'm sure..... . whispering, subtly pointing. . ........ :rolleyes::lol:

I promise I will nae be one of these horrid people you speak of. I shall be the one asking if you need ice or a foot rub ;) I am soooo not a pretentious snob!

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted
I promise I will nae be one of these horrid people you speak of. I shall be the one asking if you need ice or a foot rub ;) I am soooo not a pretentious snob!

Rah-shyelle, you will have the best time, larfin' at the snobs! ;) Actually, there were some very decent folk around us, as well......but no one offered to rub me phoot. Guess that would be beyond decent - - a little creepy, perhaps? :lol:

curlyfries Contributor
curlyfries
Posted

What happened????

Is the weekend over??????? :o

CRAP!.....Got nothin done! :angry:

But.......had celebratory dinner and dance lessons, Thurs.........dancing Fri.........garage-saleing and grocery shoppin Saturday........visit in-laws to show off grand-bebe AND dancing Sun! Whew!!! :P

Weeds pulled: 0

Bushes trimmed: 0

Loads of laundry done: 1 :ph34r:

Kichen is somewhat clean

Dog hair is winning <_<

Jess....you need to school Nik on the etiquette of drunk typing. Either she did nae drink enough, or drank too much and will wake up with an imprint of the keyboard on 'er 'ead! :rolleyes:

Jestgar Rising Star
Jestgar
Posted
Jess....you need to school Nik on the etiquette of drunk typing. Either she did nae drink enough, or drank too much and will wake up with an imprint of the keyboard on 'er 'ead! :rolleyes:

snrt

she needs to practice more.

tired and going to bed (yes, it's 7:30).

meals made 4

kitchens insulated 1

cat pee glooped with enzyme cleaner lots

rehearsal 1

pre-rehearsal martinis 1 (must start earlier next time)

I did manage to take the rest of the hollowe'en candy to the food bank (because surely they need more crap to eat). At least it was all gluten-free

Got a tiny egg yesterday. I think it means that the last of my chickens is finally laying.

Contemplating leaving my technician to show up alone on Wednesday. :ph34r: :ph34r:

At least she get overtime.

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

'Morning, Gang!

Lord, I lay awake last night thinking about eating beef stew from a li'l toilet, whilst sitting on a toilet, underneath light-fixtures shaped like turds.... . . .indeed, this is a nightmare of the first order. And this place in Singapore (or is it Japan?) is PACKED with patrons! :blink:

Gah.... . . .and that big, happy mascot - - a big, pink piece of poop with eyelashes, lipstck, Betty Boop-smile... . . ..... :huh:

:unsure:

Given the right market, literally anything will sell. . . . ....... . . :lol:

nikki-uk Enthusiast
nikki-uk
Posted

OMG!!

I'm trapped in hang over hell!!!!!!!!!....... I feel sick icon8.gif

WHERE'S GIAN-EET???????

I neeeed her!!!!!

Did I ever tell you guys that in my "letter of application" (I use that term loosely) for my preschool position, I informed the director that I don't gag at the smell (or sound)of vomit? I'm pretty sure that's why I got the job.

:lol:

Just kiddin', now't that bad but I do pheel a tad qwee-zee

Couldn't even bring meselph to look at the stew-in-a-loo pics :o

........Back later with improved brain function :wacko:

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted
Couldn't even bring meselph to look at the stew-in-a-loo pics :o

:lol::lol: Sounds like a recently uncovered Dr. Seuss manuscript from yore... .. ..

Jyaghnutt! Get thee to Nik's place! You're on Vomit Duty.. . . ......

...Hey, it was in yer CV. ... ... :P

nikki-uk Enthusiast
nikki-uk
Posted

:unsure:

What's happened????

Where are the psillies???

:unsure:

Skird!!

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

Good mornin', Nik!

How are ya feeling this morning? We did not hear from you AT ALL yesterday.... . ...I was ready to check up on you with a li'l whispery voice... . . ...... . ..

:P

psawyer Proficient
psawyer
Posted
:unsure:

What's happened????

Where are the psillies???

:unsure:

Skird!!

I've been distracted by other things. Lovely warm weather we've been having, not like November at all.

Jestgar Rising Star
Jestgar
Posted

Cold and rainy here -- very much like November...

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted

Hi all B)

Beautiful here--sunny high of 80, lows in the 50's. Does not feel like November at all to this northeasterner :lol:

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