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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

TriticusToxicum

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jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
Then a fair few of the ripper's socks shall go missing in order for Emmel to fill the cuppage :lol:

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Weeee Turkey legs!!! Why yes! we've got 'em..... there's clearly a market in the US ;)

Yeah--turkey legs here are all huge! We need the wee British turkey legs!! :rolleyes:

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jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted

And speaking of things that are huge.....the Brits are again on the pulse of this thing:

Open Original Shared Link

Em, you better hope that Will doesn't run across one o' these! :lol:

Mtndog Collaborator
Mtndog
Posted

Turkey legs made of WEE!!!!!! We can use them in case soomeone should get their tongue stuck on a frozen flagpole! :P

Hope you're feeling better PadT! :wub: On Mark!

Gawd, me too! I've been thinkin along these here lines fer a while now. Nik's social whirlwind life looks SO cosmopolitan B) I could handle one or two o'these par-tays per month or so, but many more and I'd be worn out. I wouldn't mind trying though :lol:

Me too! I want a cosmopolitan, I mean a cosmopolitan social life!

So I got Open Original Shared Link in purple and I was so excited I flashed the bar.

D'ya think that's OK?

As Nikki said "YEAH BABY!" Jess- that bra has major MOJO! I have a past history of flashing in bars meself

I think perhaps I will be getting some type of lingerie for Christmas. DH headed out to do his ten-minute, buy-for-one-person holiday shopping last evening. He took DD with him for reinforcement. Before he left, paper and pen in hand, he asked, "Okay... ......what, uh......is your chest size?"

I replied, "34 J", then waited for any reaction.

But there was only this: "Right, then", a quick jot on the note, and he turned for the door.

:lol: :lol: x 50- that is BRILLIANT. gawd, 34 J's would hurt!

All I Want for Christmas

Everybody stops

and stares at me and Emily

Our two boobs are

small as you can see

We don't know just who

to blame for this catastrophe!

But our one wish on Christmas Eve

is as plain as it can be!

All we want for Christmas

is big, firm 34 J's,

34J's,

34j's!

Gee, if we could only

have much bigger boobs,

then we could wish you

"Chesty Christmas."

It seems so long since we could wear,

lingerie with big, bad cups

Gosh oh gee, how happy our hubbys'd be,

if we walked around in fishnet push-ups!

Tee hee

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted
Open Original Shared Link

Em, you better hope that Will doesn't run across one o' these! :lol:

Hey! I can give him that URL, and he can simply order one... . . .as he ain't gonna find one over here.. .. ..

Look! Better yet, I'll simply email him this at work:

Open Original Shared Link

Of course, I shall assure him that I'll look EXACTLY like that woman when I put it on. ...... <_<<_<

:lol:

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

BEVEL'S BOOB CAROL! :lol::lol:

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
BEVEL'S BOOB CAROL! :lol::lol:

A Christmas classic! :rolleyes:

Jestgar Rising Star
Jestgar
Posted

Open Original Shared Link

really, i am studying....

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jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
Open Original Shared Link

really, i am studying....

We can tell :P

Mtndog Collaborator
Mtndog
Posted

And I'm correcting papers! :lol: :lol: :lol:

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
And I'm correcting papers! :lol: :lol: :lol:

Uh-huh....sure. And I'm cleaning and wrapping gifts. :lol:

Mtndog Collaborator
Mtndog
Posted

Love this:

celiac-mommy Collaborator
celiac-mommy
Posted

I've drug meself back to thee computer. I am now able to walk upright, sit down and get back up without screaming. I only mildly feel the softball sized lump of muscle in my left glute from day 5 of P90X in which I did an hour of legs and back. Today is day 7, the day of rest, thank God! It's to try to make you forget you have to do core synergistics again tomorrow which is essentially an hour of pushups <_<

I replied, "34 J", then waited for any reaction.

But there was only this: "Right, then", a quick jot on the note, and he turned for the door.

:huh:

:lol:

Apparently, he really has no idea what that would look like.. ... . . ...though I am certain that he's actually seen it, in his dreams. .. . ...... :lol:

Um, I used to be a 36H :o Tru dat :P

:lol: :lol: x 50- that is BRILLIANT. gawd, 34 J's would hurt!

Um, Yes they do, and I've got the dents in me shoulders to prove it!

And I LURVE the boob carol!!

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

Hey..... .. ....it's just me and POeter 'round here.... . . ..good afternoon, Oracle P.....where in hell is everyone? :unsure: .. ... . . . .....

psawyer Proficient
psawyer
Posted

Indeed, where have all the sillies gone?

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted

Hi youse guys....I'm here, just trying to avoid the lure of the computer so I can get things done :lol:

Mtndog Collaborator
Mtndog
Posted
Indeed, where have all the sillies gone?

I'm here-multi-tasking while watching Twilight trying to figure out the lure of this Edward-Bella-Jacob thing. Must say Robert Pattinson is a good looking boy. I did the math tho- I'm WAY too old fer him! :P:lol: He's not 28 (you know the divide yer age by half and add 7 equation!)

Time fer the holiday song of the day!

Baby, I'm Really Drunk Now

I really can't drink - Baby I'm such a lightweight

I've had too much gin - Baby I'm such a lightweight

This cocktail has been - So very nice -

I think I'll have just one more, but with extra ice

My mother will start to worry - You must understand my hurry

Baby, I'm such a lightweight

I'll soon be licking the floor - Listening to the fireplace roar

So really I'd better stop here -

Baby, I'm such a lightweight

You may not be beautiful but this beer Is making me wear beer goggles -

Your balls I'm starting to oggle

Baby, I'm really drunk now...........

nikki-uk Enthusiast
nikki-uk
Posted
I'm here-multi-tasking while watching Twilight trying to figure out the lure of this Edward-Bella-Jacob thing. Must say Robert Pattinson is a good looking boy. I did the math tho- I'm WAY too old fer him! :P:lol: He's not 28 (you know the divide yer age by half and add 7 equation!)

Time fer the holiday song of the day!

Baby, I'm Really Drunk Now

I really can't drink - Baby I'm such a lightweight

I've had too much gin - Baby I'm such a lightweight

This cocktail has been - So very nice -

I think I'll have just one more, but with extra ice

My mother will start to worry - You must understand my hurry

Baby, I'm such a lightweight

I'll soon be licking the floor - Listening to the fireplace roar

So really I'd better stop here -

Baby, I'm such a lightweight

You may not be beautiful but this beer Is making me wear beer goggles -

Your balls I'm starting to oggle

Baby, I'm really drunk now...........

:lol::lol::lol:

BEVEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

...and balls to the half yer age plus 7........Robert Pattinson is HAWT! :lol::unsure::ph34r:

BAH!!!!....can I resign as chief Mummy???........ I don't like it NO MOAR!!

Evil teen <_<

psawyer Proficient
psawyer
Posted

Having Olympic headaches about traffic. Canada is the host country, and the torch is making its way around the country. My morning commute should be fine, as we travel at about 8:15 over the route--about three hours before the torch arrives. But if we leave at our usual time and follow our usual route home we will run head-on into the procession.

We have put up the Christmas tree this evening, but have not decorated it. Well, except for the one decoration I found in the corner behind the love seat that must have been knocked off by a cat last year. It is on the tree, alone.

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
We have put up the Christmas tree this evening, but have not decorated it. Well, except for the one decoration I found in the corner behind the love seat that must have been knocked off by a cat last year. It is on the tree, alone.

Love it! :D

nikki-uk Enthusiast
nikki-uk
Posted
We have put up the Christmas tree this evening, but have not decorated it. Well, except for the one decoration I found in the corner behind the love seat that must have been knocked off by a cat last year. It is on the tree, alone.

Ah HA!!!

What a coup PeOter!!!!!!! :lol:

<back to procrastinating wrapping, but would rather be doing summat else......anything.......am in purgatory, even WITH tape dispenser!!!>

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

Well, it is -20C with the windchill, here. Historically, my dogs have never cared -- they want and need to go for a looooooonnnnnng sojourn in the nearby meadow. So, I am about to put Gus's winter sweater on Charles......'twill be interesting to see if he is as humilated as my Gus always was when we headed out, him all decked out in his fine winter zip-up cardigan. :rolleyes::wub:

I think Charles does not care about such things.....he is just so happy and grateful to be in a house where he is not being neglected and/or abused.......I could probably put him in a tu-tu, and it would be all okay.... . . ... :rolleyes:

Nik! Ya got a magical tape dispenser in the mix, and it's still hell? Man, you got it bad, methinks.... .. .... :lol:

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
Well, it is -20C with the windchill, here. Historically, my dogs have never cared -- they want and need to go for a looooooonnnnnng sojourn in the nearby meadow. So, I am about to put Gus's winter sweater on Charles......'twill be interesting to see if he is as humilated as my Gus always was when we headed out, him all decked out in his fine winter zip-up cardigan. :rolleyes::wub:

I think Charles does not care about such things.....he is just so happy and grateful to be in a house where he is not being neglected and/or abused.......I could probably put him in a tu-tu, and it would be all okay.... . . ... :rolleyes:

Em, I remember it well--the look on Gus's face when dressed in his winter sweater. :lol: He was such a regal gentleman--surely above wearing something as pedestrian as a sweater, fer pete's sake! :D

I'm sure wee Charles will wear it wif pride ;)

Stay warm, all o' youse!

I was just driving home from CVS (it's raining like all get out) listening to Wynonna singing "White Christmas" on the radio :lol:

Mtndog Collaborator
Mtndog
Posted

Tis VERY chilly here today too. After my walk with Angus (in a long coat) me legs felt like popsicles! Charles in a tutu......tee hee!

We are having a Silly Sunday yankee Swap with our family here this weekend. 14 people (5 kids). You have to bring something from your house that you no longer want- the funnier the better. Any ideas? I'm thinking an old pair of Kurt's socks....or my stunning red, white and blue diamon-studded 4th of July glasses that look like

FF153_M.webp

I'm working on today's holiday song. Writer's block! I'll steal someone else's fer now!

I'll be Cloned for Christmas

(To The Tune "I'll be Home for Christmas")

by D M Goldstein

I'll be Cloned for Christmas,

There

curlyfries Contributor
curlyfries
Posted
We are having a Silly Sunday yankee Swap with our family here this weekend. 14 people (5 kids). You have to bring something from your house that you no longer want- the funnier the better. Any ideas?

Well.....if you do the socks, he has to walk around the back yard in them first.

We do something similar every year, but it's implemented into a game.

Lesseee......some o' the more memorable ones.........

Old jock strap

suppository

banana peel

chinchilla poop in a chocolate sprinkles container

I know there's more.......I'll get back to you on that :P

You could always bring a collection of nail clippings....or dog hair.......dryer lint.........used tissues........somethin from the fridge that is unidentifiable......... :rolleyes:

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted
Old jock strap

suppository

banana peel

chinchilla poop in a chocolate sprinkles container

You could always bring a collection of nail clippings....or dog hair.......dryer lint.........used tissues........somethin from the fridge that is unidentifiable......... :rolleyes:

Leeesargh! Jeez, you suddenly have me thinking creatively again about some sculpture/mural work. ... . . .....

:huh:

:lol:

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