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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

TriticusToxicum

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Ridgewalker Contributor
Ridgewalker
Posted
God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

Then Satan created HMOs.

Janet! :lol: OMG you're killing me! :lol: :lol: That was a great laugh for a stinky Monday morning!!!

Jin, I'm in north central North Carolina. I've been doing the same thing- a/c during the day, because it's 80+ degrees, then I turn on the heat at night because it's 50 degrees! I'm trying to keep the house at a consistent temperature, though, just switching from air to heat. So hopefully it won't kill my electric bill too much.

A few years ago, in March, I think, we had two weeks in the 70s, and bam, it snowed. :o WTH? It makes me crazy when the weather does stuff like that!

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Jestgar Rising Star
Jestgar
Posted

Q Why was Jesus born in a manger?

Jestgar Rising Star
Jestgar
Posted

A He had an HMO

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

So my hospital is opening a state of the art cancer institute in 2009, everything will be under one roof instead of spread all over the campus like it is currently. Today was the dedication ceremony and We got to sign the steel beam that will be visible in the new building. It was neat.

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
So my hospital is opening a state of the art cancer institute in 2009, everything will be under one roof instead of spread all over the campus like it is currently. Today was the dedication ceremony and We got to sign the steel beam that will be visible in the new building. It was neat.

Wow--very cool! :)

DingoGirl Enthusiast
DingoGirl
Posted
Jesus would have handed out the bread to his apostles and said something like, "This is my body given to you; do this in rememberance of...gee, I dunno about you guys, but this stuff makes me feel really bloated and achy"...

A whole different set of parables. Light, I think you should run with this. "Genetically Modified Grain in the Age of Christ: The Rewriting of the Testaments"... :rolleyes::lol:

Can you imagine.....Jesus and the apostles in FULL neurotoxic depression from highly-glutenized wheat and modified "food" proteins.......they would have been tired, cranky, bloated and pissy and gotten very little done! (like me, for most of my paltry life :angry::huh:)

Thanks for the segue, Jin . . .

:lol: that one always make me out of my mind (with glee)

So my hospital is opening a state of the art cancer institute in 2009, everything will be under one roof instead of spread all over the campus like it is currently. Today was the dedication ceremony and We got to sign the steel beam that will be visible in the new building. It was neat.

I want to work there. Can you get me a job there? I'm a fast typist and wildly entertaining (only on breaks, of course) :P

Ho.....Hum......slow monday......

the Weasel is not limping as badly today! Alas, I have discovered two lumps, one nearly the size of a small egg :o and the other, about two inches away from taht, like a small marble...so I am going to take her in. Could be lipomas.....OMG if they are anything serious...... :( Good gawd, banish the thought and

CARRY ON WITH SILLINESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

p.s. did anyone watch Desperate Housewives last night? I was chortling in my bed..... :lol:

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
p.s. did anyone watch Desperate Housewives last night? I was chortling in my bed..... :lol:

I was watching from bed, too :lol: The second half, anyway....I chuckled during the scene at the party where Edie was watching who was taking the crab cakes--and then the light dawned :o:D

I'll be thinking good thoughts that the Weasel-puppy is ok and it's all nothing serious. :)

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DingoGirl Enthusiast
DingoGirl
Posted
I was watching from bed, too :lol: The second half, anyway....I chuckled during the scene at the party where Edie was watching who was taking the crab cakes--and then the light dawned :o:D

*snort*

Yup - that was one scene - there was another and I can't remember - had another laugh-out-loud guffaw... :lol:

You know - - I remember when I used to read - BOOKS - always a book instead of the wicked TV....good Lord.....what has happened to me...... :huh::lol:

<laaaazy, lame-arse, gluten-brain.....:huh>

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

Didn't watch DH last night (Desparate Housewives, not Dear Husband). Actually, I did watch him raking up the bijillion leaves in our backyard. Fall is here, but not according to the thermometer.

So, where are the guys? The very nerve of Richard, actually doing some work. Could that really be happening? Tom has had bubble boy syndrome of late. Hmmmmm...not the same without them.

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted
Didn't watch DH last night (Desparate Housewives, not Dear Husband). Actually, I did watch him raking up the bijillion leaves in our backyard. Fall is here, but not according to the thermometer.

So, where are the guys? The very nerve of Richard, actually doing some work. Could that really be happening? Tom has had bubble boy syndrome of late. Hmmmmm...not the same without them.

Richard working.....now that is a country unheard of....we might just have to ice skate home tonight...hell may have frozen over :)

TriticusToxicum Explorer
TriticusToxicum
Posted
  • Author
Richard working.....now that is a country unheard of....we might just have to ice skate home tonight...hell may have frozen over :)

No skating party just yet :rolleyes:

I AM at work, and I AM at my desk looking diligent, but mostly feeling like crap. Someone snuck me some gluten over the weekend, so I spent the night tossing and turning trying to untwist my bowels...I should have stayed home...but I had to leave the house to drop the kids @ school. Now just killing time, trying not to soil myself. (where's the green guy when you need him :blink: )

Carry on

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
No skating party just yet :rolleyes:

I AM at work, and I AM at my desk looking diligent, but mostly feeling like crap. Someone snuck me some gluten over the weekend, so I spent the night tossing and turning trying to untwist my bowels...I should have stayed home...but I had to leave the house to drop the kids @ school. Now just killing time, trying not to soil myself. (where's the green guy when you need him :blink: )

Carry on

Oh Richard--not the gluten-induced tossing and turning :( . Happens to me every time--ugh.

Hang in there and I hope it doesn't last too long. :)

I hope whoever snuck you that gluten didn't do it on purpose :angry:

DingoGirl Enthusiast
DingoGirl
Posted

Richard! a true heinosity, WHO snuck you the gluten? :o Poor thing.

And still, you are wildly entertaining.......your avatar.... :lol: :lol: :lol: Brah-vo....

I think I'll put my party back up, in your honoUr. Feel better......

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

Sorry to hear you are sick Richard. A few of my coworkers including my cubie mate are home with the stomach flu....eek! I didn't feel too well myself this morning, but I think i am just tired from all the running this past week. Get well soon!

TriticusToxicum Explorer
TriticusToxicum
Posted
  • Author
Oh Richard--not the gluten-induced tossing and turning :( . Happens to me every time--ugh.

Hang in there and I hope it doesn't last too long. :)

I hope whoever snuck you that gluten didn't do it on purpose :angry:

Thanks.

I didn't actually SEE the 'Hoff (incidentally that is the sound my dog used to make as she 'Hoffed something up) in my neighboorhood, so I can't point fingers...

I'm pretty sure it was my Saturday dinner date with my wife's friends. They are well meaning but basically clueless :( It could have been anything. (anything except the "peanut blossoms" i made Saturday and have been snarfing ever since :rolleyes: )

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
Thanks.

I didn't actually SEE the 'Hoff (incidentally that is the sound my dog used to make as she 'Hoffed something up) in my neighboorhood, so I can't point fingers...

I'm pretty sure it was my Saturday dinner date with my wife's friends. They are well meaning but basically clueless :( It could have been anything. (anything except the "peanut blossoms" i made Saturday and have been snarfing ever since :rolleyes: )

With The Hoff on the loose, you never know....

(In my best Homer Simpson voice) M-m-m-m, Peanut blossoms. How good are those while the kisses are still warm :rolleyes:

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted
With The Hoff on the loose, you never know....

(In my best Homer Simpson voice) M-m-m-m, Peanut blossoms. How good are those while the kisses are still warm :rolleyes:

LOL

CarlaB Enthusiast
CarlaB
Posted

Sorry you're feeling bad, Richard.

<--------Nikki, check it out!

nikki-uk Enthusiast
nikki-uk
Posted
Sorry you're feeling bad, Richard.

<--------Nikki, check it out!

Why!, it's an (empty) Aga.

Looks lovely Carla - hows the kitchen coming on?

BAH on clueless dinner dates Richard <_<

Gonna have to join the ranks of 'got a sick pet' :(

Willbee (Will the kitty) fell off the dining table (missed the chair on his jump down - due to an over zealous shoo-ing by hubby <_< ) INJURED his leg :( ....can't put any weight on it! <_< ..is mewing!! <_<

Hubby is IN THE DOGHOUSE! :angry: for being heavyhanded and it looks like I'll be paying a visit to the vets too (cha-CHING indeed!)

Perhaps me & Susie could set up an international fund 'for people who can't really afford to take their pets to the vets' :lol:

Oh dear :( ...poor pets

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

oooohhhhh....looking nervously at my huge, goofball, uncoordinated and heavily accident-prone standard poodle...something's in the air! It's travelled to England...what's to stop it floating up here? Gotta watch him.

Sorry about the intestinal grenades, Richard. One of the symptoms I do NOT have when glutened, very fortunately, is obvious flatulence. I'm assuming you do, hence the gas mask. Safe to guess that you remain fairly alone at your end of the office? :P:D

nikki-uk Enthusiast
nikki-uk
Posted
Sorry about the intestinal grenades, Richard. One of the symptoms I do NOT have when glutened, very fortunately, is obvious flatulence. I'm assuming you do, hence the gas mask. Safe to guess that you remain fairly alone at your end of the office? :P:D

The work colleagues get to go home - it's Richard's wife I pity....remember my hubby is a coeliac and trust me!..you DO NOT want to get your head caught under the covers :wacko: ....EVIL!!!!!!!!!!!!

Green12 Enthusiast
Green12
Posted

Hi Sillies.

The snow is in Denver, CO.

Which silly lives in NC? I'm jealous, that's where the Blue Ridge Mtns. are right?? Must get there in my lifetime....

In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

Excellent Janet, I love this!

So sorry Richard you got glutened :( I hope you feel better soon.

With The Hoff on the loose, you never know....

:lol: Patti

Tis true, I saw on the news that the Hoff was reportedly frolicking naked through Richard's neighborhood passing out gluten whilst smelling of wee......

CarlaB Enthusiast
CarlaB
Posted

duplicate post

CarlaB Enthusiast
CarlaB
Posted

Nikki, that picture was taken about an hour ago ... so, today and tomorrow, my Aga is getting installed ... then the tile floor. Next week, cabinets. :)

I'm not caught up ... I just needed to share my excitement, and no one here even knows what it is! LOL

I've been feeling much better, so have been too busy to keep up with the 30 pages per day! Where were you guys when I was feeling bad?! :P

Snow, yuck!!

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

I just got back from the Nursery. My neighbor downstairs had her baby yesterday morning.

A Boy--Landen

8lbs

head full of curly blonde hair.

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