The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

[JNBunnie1]

What's the name of those tall skinny funny looking dogs that look like they're going to snap in half at the waist? Yup, that's my baby.....

[IrishHeart]

hmm....a whippet? a borzoi?

[kareng]

A Saluki? We knew someone who had 2. They are really fast. They could keep up with A full speed horse.

Open Original Shared Link

[Jestgar]

What to do on a rainy Thursday? Give a remote controlled cat toy to a pirate and watch him entertain himself.

[JNBunnie1]

  On 5/31/2012 at 4:44 PM, kareng said:

A Saluki? We knew someone who had 2. They are really fast. They could keep up with A full speed horse.

Open Original Shared Link

Yup! A saluki, that's it! He's so fast, too, he's 6'5", so just his normal walking pace I have to jog to keep up with. And he runs, when he runs he just disappears into the distnce before you realize what's happening.

[mushroom]

Them Salukis are always Rushin'

[Jestgar]

OK. I'm doing a blog. I figure it'll keep my writing skills up (or cause them to deteriorate if I try to keep everything to the eighth grade level), and give me something to do other than popping another Harry Potter movie in, and plopping on the couch with a plate of nachos.

I'll try a couple posts out, then put it on facebook. If anyone's willing to critique my first couple tries, let me know and I'll send you the link.

If I can figure out how to get back to the site.

Did I mention that I have no idea what I'm doing?

[IrishHeart]

  On 6/1/2012 at 9:32 PM, Jestgar said:

Did I mention that I have no idea what I'm doing?

J,

You know how to write, therefore you can blog.

Have fun.

[kareng]

I'll laugh at critique your blog! It if has chickens, cats and pirates living peacefully together, it's got to be good!

[Jestgar]

  On 6/1/2012 at 9:42 PM, kareng said:

I'll laugh at critique your blog! It if has chickens, cats and pirates living peacefully together, it's got to be good!

ok, but I haven't figured out how to put in pictures yet, so don't dis me on the lack of visuals....

[kareng]

  On 6/1/2012 at 9:52 PM, Jestgar said:

ok, but I haven't figured out how to put in pictures yet, so don't dis me on the lack of visuals....

No visuals necessary for that topic!

[IrishHeart]

a chicken joke for Jess in honor of her newly hatched blog:

Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip?

To get to the same side.

(My scientist hubs found that hysterical.)

[mushroom]

Lest I be perceived as a bunny monster, I set forth the following:

Take a small country the size of Colorado; let there be no predatory mammals or reptiles there; and let us introduce the too cuuute little bunny rabbit with his cottontail and his and her breeding propensities with no natural enemy; let this country produce the greatest graslands and the tastiest lamb in the world (well, the Aussies might dispute that ); let the bunnies - unmolested - eat all the grass and burrow through all the grasslands and do that other thing that bunnies do, so that entire hillsides are moving with bunnies and horses rounding up the sheep are breaking their legs in rabbit warrens.

So let there be established in every county in every province in said country a Rabbit Board which employs rabbiters who live in a rabbiter's hut, whose duty it is to snuff the bunnies; but the job is too much, so let us have fundraising drives for the schools (for there is a bounty on rabbit tails) and let the farmers set forth one weekend a year - or more frequently - to decimate the bunnie population to the extent possible, and let us drive down the road and see all the bunnie hides drying on the wire fences. And let the schools gain funding for musical instruments and music lessons and whatever else they need. But still there are too many bunnies...

And let diseases be introduced to decimate the bunny population, to which disease the bunnies build immunity and come back stronger than before....

Do you still feel the same about bunnies?

[tom]

  On 5/29/2012 at 12:03 PM, elye said:

...

Doesn't everybody get a running-like-a-faucet nose in freezing weather??

lol at the Alaskan joke that reminds me of (of which that remindeth?)

In winter a mechanic comes upon a full facial-haired Alaskan whose truck has stalled. It's kinda desolate & it looks like he's been there a while so he stops, figuring he could help him out.

In a few minutes, it's obvious what the problem is.

"Looks like you blew a seal" he says.

"Oh . . . no, that's just frozen snot"

[elye]

  On 6/3/2012 at 4:08 AM, mushroom said:

Do you still feel the same about bunnies?

Who knew those cute li'l critters could decimate things on such a huge level?

We have the pudgy brown cottontails, suddenly rampant in our neck of the city over the past ten years....forget the lovely annual and perennial beds in front of one's house....

Right after the Second World War, Holland wanted to thank Ottawa in due fashion for harbouring their queen and princess while their country faced great peril. The Dutch High Commissioner was dispatched to Canada, and in a grand ceremony at Parliament Hill he presented us with several thousand tulip bulbs, and a little cage, which when open revealed a male and female black squirrel.

Um, yeah.... . . ..thanks.....

Now The Netherlands and south-eastern Ontario are the only places on earth with pitch-black squirrels (perhaps by now they've made their way into the northern US). Incredibly resilient, brash, destructive, loud.....

However, like the squirrels, the tulips now number in the many millions, and are incredibly beautiful.

ANNNNND the black squirrels EAT my tulips.....

What the hell kind of pairing was that??

  On 6/3/2012 at 10:45 AM, tom said:

"Oh . . . no, that's just frozen snot"

:lol: Will pass that along to my Northern in-laws.....

[Jestgar]

  On 6/3/2012 at 4:08 AM, mushroom said:

Lest I be perceived as a bunny monster, I set forth the following:

Do you still feel the same about bunnies?

I'm surprised that mor NZ dishes don't have the word 'rabbit' in the title.

[IrishHeart]

Sorry the bunnies are so destructive. The ones on my property must be weeded out often enough by predators so they are not as destructive or overwhelming. (and I did not think you were a bunny monster at all. I do know what damage they can do. )

I have an equally obnoxious "critter" problem that is threatening to destroy my 7 acres of paradise. Asshat neighbors on our secluded dirt road who have made all of our lives a living hell with their loud TOYS and modified trucks and they do not care who they bother. Our peaceful paradise gone down the tubes as they ride these toys through our property and up and down the road. It's as if we have the Indianapolis speedway right here. Do they care they are bothering the people who have lived here for generations? Nope. When presented with a polite and reasonable request to calm it down and possibly restrict the hours of playtime, he said "F--k you, I pay my taxes. I have a right to enjoy my toys. I'm sorry you've been sick and all, but that's too bad. I'm gonna do what I wanna do". When trying to talk to the WIFE about this, we got a screaming banshee who yelled "Get the F off my property. We want to move because of YOU. We can't even do what we want."

Us? the nice neighbors who gave them a welcoming basket and Christmas gifts and who simply ask them to refrain from doing this at 5:30 AM or 11 PM. (we are unreasonable, aren't we?) I cannot even keep my windows open anymore.

(these are people in their 30s and 40s behaving like children) The sheriff's dept. can't do anything if they use these things on their own lawns. Catching them on the road (which is against the law) is difficult to do.

I see your point about getting rid of the bunnies who wreak havoc and repopulate and destroy the land and the peacfeul existence you cherish and I wonder if I could hunt my version of "pesky wabbits" and get rid of them without being sent to jail.

Hubs and I are getting ready to sell our beloved home of 25 years because more and more of them are invading the countryside.

I'd take more bunnies over this lunacy any day. At least you can--as you suggest--saute them in a pan.

[mushroom]

  On 6/3/2012 at 2:00 PM, IrishHeart said:

I'd take more bunnies over this lunacy any day. At least you can--as you suggest--saute them in a pan.

I am so sorry your neighborhood is being overpopulated with lunatics, IH. At least our lunatics who invade our peaceful little bay down below with their jetskis go home at night and we can live in peace for a while.

Ironically, I believe for a long time it was illegal to sell wabbits as food in stores or to keep a pet wabbit - afraid someone would start breeding even more of 'em, I guess. If you want a wabbit in your sautee pan you have to either catch it yourself or buy it frozen.

[JNBunnie1]

  On 6/3/2012 at 2:00 PM, IrishHeart said:

Sorry the bunnies are so destructive. The ones on my property must be weeded out often enough by predators so they are not as destructive or overwhelming. (and I did not think you were a bunny monster at all. I do know what damage they can do. )

I have an equally obnoxious "critter" problem that is threatening to destroy my 7 acres of paradise. Asshat neighbors on our secluded dirt road who have made all of our lives a living hell with their loud TOYS and modified trucks and they do not care who they bother. Our peaceful paradise gone down the tubes as they ride these toys through our property and up and down the road. It's as if we have the Indianapolis speedway right here. Do they care they are bothering the people who have lived here for generations? Nope. When presented with a polite and reasonable request to calm it down and possibly restrict the hours of playtime, he said "F--k you, I pay my taxes. I have a right to enjoy my toys. I'm sorry you've been sick and all, but that's too bad. I'm gonna do what I wanna do". When trying to talk to the WIFE about this, we got a screaming banshee who yelled "Get the F off my property. We want to move because of YOU. We can't even do what we want."

Us? the nice neighbors who gave them a welcoming basket and Christmas gifts and who simply ask them to refrain from doing this at 5:30 AM or 11 PM. (we are unreasonable, aren't we?) I cannot even keep my windows open anymore.

(these are people in their 30s and 40s behaving like children) The sheriff's dept. can't do anything if they use these things on their own lawns. Catching them on the road (which is against the law) is difficult to do.

I see your point about getting rid of the bunnies who wreak havoc and repopulate and destroy the land and the peacfeul existence you cherish and I wonder if I could hunt my version of "pesky wabbits" and get rid of them without being sent to jail.

Hubs and I are getting ready to sell our beloved home of 25 years because more and more of them are invading the countryside.

I'd take more bunnies over this lunacy any day. At least you can--as you suggest--saute them in a pan.

Would it be possible to take video of these idiots and give that to the police? Would that help at all?

[IrishHeart]

  On 6/3/2012 at 5:21 PM, JNBunnie1 said:

Would it be possible to take video of these idiots and give that to the police? Would that help at all?

Other people in this little town have tried doing this, according to the woman who works in the town hall. This is a very rural area and the Sheriff takes about 20 minutes to get here.

By the time someone comes to check out your complaint, they are off the road.

You can ride these things on your own property, so that's what they do.

They stopped coming onto our land after we asked them to stop cutting through. At least they did that.

But that does not stop the rest of it.

They lit a bonfire one night last summer that got so out- of- control they scorched their brand new siding (I confess hubs and I laughed over that one for a few days) Idiots.

My biggest fear is they will set the trees on our land on fire someday when they get drunk, shoot their guns , and light their fireworks

[kareng]

Em- black squirrels are a protected species on Marysville, KS. Open Original Shared Link

Every time we get too many bunnies here, the babies get sick and die. They pass around an intestinal parasite when there are too many. So right now, with the mild winter, we have too many bunnies. Kids want me to help the sick young ones but I have to explain that by the time it's that sick, i can't get enough medicine in it before it will die. They are infected at birth by the mom. They have a fragile immune system, blah, blah, blah! Perhaps we could give that parasite to NZ?

They used to have a system of paying for the ears, I think it was, of coyotes. You could keep the fur and sell it and get a bounty from the goverment, too.

[IrishHeart]

  On 6/3/2012 at 7:23 PM, kareng said:

Perhaps we could give that parasite to NZ?

hmm..... how can I give this parasite to LOUD/ abusive/ racist/ foul- mouthed neighbors....I could "weed out" the herd...

[kareng]

  On 6/3/2012 at 7:42 PM, IrishHeart said:

hmm..... how can I give this parasite to LOUD/ abusive/ racist/ foul- mouthed neighbors....I could "weed out" the herd...

An intestinal parasite would surely slow them down?

[IrishHeart]

  On 6/3/2012 at 8:04 PM, kareng said:

An intestinal parasite would surely slow them down?

K, be a pally and ship a few of those wonky wabbits to me, wouldja?

[mushroom]

  On 6/3/2012 at 7:23 PM, kareng said:

Perhaps we could give that parasite to NZ?

Iffen you can get it by MAF (Ministry of Agriculture and Fisheries) They frown quite severely on that kind of stuph (after the rabbit - and possum, and stoat, and etc. debacles, you unnerstand). Next, someone will have the bright idea to introduce snakes to catch all them varmints, and then we will have to import the whole of the world's ecosystem to correct the mistakes of our British forebears. :rolleyes:But a bunch of desperate farmers from Otago brought the rabbit calcivirus back from Oz surreptitiously. Dang rabbits are immune to that now, too! as well as myxamatosis, but if you could get em early before their immune systems developed.... well, that does hold some possibilities.....

I wish I could understand what it is with boys and their toys!!! Grow up already, dang it There are places you can go where loud noises are sanctioned (Indianapolis comes to mind) -- go there and leave the tranquility alone.