The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

[tom (HubbaHubba)]

STREAKING??!!!?? Whist At Work??!!?? We'll if your trying to keep a low profile while checking the silly thread, I certainly wouldn't do it nekkid!!

Speak fer yerself bayyyyy-beeeeeeee!!!!!!!

:D

brrrrrrrr it's COLD!!!!!!! :shivering-guy-w/-blue-lips:

[Green12]

I come back to 4 new pages and 2 false alarm pregnancies, you guys work fast!

We need cullinary translations,

Beaver Tails sound kind of like a bear claw meets a croissant?

Chips= french fries?

Susie, your biscuit explanation made my mouth water!!

[elye]

Lemme know where it is - I'll join you and get my other old lady friends

I've been in a lot of retirement residences over the last few years, looking for an apartment for my DH's aunt and then for my parents, and it's really something. There is one old guy to about twenty women. My parents are in a complex with probably 200 people....9 of them are men. One big hen party...the old farts stay up in their apartments, the women are downstairs shuffleboarding, doing aerobics, playing bridge. Great for the single guys, I suppose....

No we have to return unused study drugs in order to pick new ones up here

You could auction off the opened bottles..."Got migraines? This'll fix y'up...we'll start at twenty bucks. Blood pressure's making your veins crack? Here ya go, and it's three-quarters full--ten bucks"....

And speaking of music, today feels a LOT like a sax day!!!!! (Boehv?? That's an A, not an E! )

...What does a sax day feel like, Tom? I've had tuba days (heavy, amusing, expensive), and accordion days (just want it to be over)....

She says "I don't care how they talk in Pigland" I was rofl!!

Unnyfay!!!!!

Obviously a hoverer with poor aim . . . or perhaps in mid-hover, the purse she was balancing on her head started to slide. In an effort to keep her purse from hitting the floor, she lost sight of her target . . . so to speak.

Gad......rank amateur.......

Speak fer yerself bayyyyy-beeeeeeee!!!!!!!

brrrrrrrr it's COLD!!!!!!! :shivering-guy-w/-blue-lips:

Yep...Saw your name doing funny things, Mr. Hubba.....

[nikki-uk]

Obviously a hoverer with poor aim . . . or perhaps in mid-hover, the purse she was balancing on her head started to slide. In an effort to keep her purse from hitting the floor, she lost sight of her target . . . so to speak.

...that must have been it!!!!!!!!!!!.........they must have thought ''Oh shoot!!...I misfired.....oh well , I'll leave it for the next poor unsuspecting women to find''

Log fiend in Amanda's dept!!!!!!!!!!!!!

STREAKING??!!!?? Whilst At Work??!!?? We'll if your trying to keep a low profile while checking the silly thread, I certainly wouldn't do it nekkid!!

I wondered why Colleen's user name was underlined, in bold with Italics.

GAD!!! No wonder her boss doesn't want her using the internet if she streaks everytime......wonder how her co-workers react???

[nikki-uk]

...What does a sax day feel like, Tom? I've had tuba days (heavy, amusing, expensive), and accordion days (just want it to be over)....

OMG!!........ I don't even want to talk about French Horn days........heinous

Yep...Saw your name doing funny things, Mr. Hubba.....

Colleen streaking brought him out.....mac flapping behind him

[Darn210]

:lol: :lol: Lemme know where it is - I'll join you and get my other old lady friends

You're on . . . I'm sure we'll all still be posting on this forum . . . I'll PM you when it's time to pick a joint.

I've been in a lot of retirement residences over the last few years, looking for an apartment for my DH's aunt and then for my parents, and it's really something. There is one old guy to about twenty women. My parents are in a complex with probably 200 people....9 of them are men. One big hen party...the old farts stay up in their apartments, the women are downstairs shuffleboarding, doing aerobics, playing bridge. Great for the single guys, I suppose....

Same kind of ratio as . . . hmmm . . . here?

[Ridgewalker]

My best friend and I agreed a couple years ago, that when our husbands pass into the great beyond, we're moving into an old farm house... get some rocking chairs and adopt a boatload of cats.

[jerseyangel]

My best friend and I agreed a couple years ago, that when our husbands pass into the great beyond, we're moving into an old farm house... get some rocking chairs and adopt a boatload of cats.

Sounds like a great plan!

[elye]

Same kind of ratio as . . . hmmm . . . here?

Some things never change...we'll all be wizzened up old hags residing in the same retirement home, doing the trivia nights, seniors' yoga and euchre tournaments...and Tom will up in his apartment with his sax...

[Darn210]

Some things never change...we'll all be wizzened up old hags residing in the same retirement home, doing the trivia nights, seniors' yoga and euchre tournaments...and Tom will up in his apartment with his sax...

. . . and we'll still be talking "poop".

[elye]

. . . and we'll still be talking "poop".

....and how we are no longer able to hover....

...actually, we'll all have walkers, and they will be VERY handy to help with the hover (they should also be marketed as "hover-helpers")....ya just hang on, and you could hold mid-hover for minutes on end!

[Darn210]

....and how we are no longer able to hover....

...actually, we'll all have walkers, and they will be VERY handy to help with the hover (they should also be marketed as "hover-helpers")....ya just hang on, and you could hold mid-hover for minutes on end!

Hell, we'll be draggin' our own commodes around with us.

[psawyer]

So, today's flurry of excitement over reports of Sarah being pregnant leaves me feeling compelled to share this little story.

As you know, Jacquie and I run a retail store. One of our employees is named Sarah.

In mid-December, Sarah mentions to us that she had been feeling kind of yucky, lack of appetite and nausea in the morning. Jacquie jokingly asked, "You're not pregnant, are you?" She says, "no way."

Well, she went to the doctor, and, you guessed it, she and her husband are expecting their first.

Hmmmm.

[blueeyedmanda]

I will have a hoover helper!!! We can sit around talking about the Golden Days of the Silly thread.

[Mtndog]

Egads- first, sarah's pregnant then she's not and then Amanda's pregnant and then she's not but then reveals she's "trying" which would explain why she's so perky every morning!!!!!!! :lol:

My cat slept on my pillow between my head and the headboard all night last night....literally from 1-5:30 am, he never does that. I actually put my hand on him to make sure he was alive (he never stays still that long, he is only 2 and is still very active and playful)

I was telling my coworker about him sleeping and she said her cat slept with her all night too which is also rare, turns out it was a full moon last night...weird huh?

Dem meow meows is SMART. I think our female is a serial killer plotting to kill us all. Actually she's leaning over my shoulder as I type this and I KNOW she can read.

I really do (or did ) love Beaver Tails so I hope that makes up for my hate of Poutine and allows me to maintain my citizenship!

This actually scared me...I thought BEAVER TAILS? Must be one of the Canadian delicacies, eh? Phew!!!!!

[

BEV! Well I don't know about YOU, but *I* am NOT obsessed w/ dog nuts.....I mean, Annie doesn't even have any for Peter's sake.........

:lol: Angus doesn't either!

must say, NEVER In my life have I seen fries w/ gravy - - we eat them only w/ ketchup here - - and I must say, I was partaking in a GIANT basket of fries from DEDICATED fryer at Nepenthe last Sunday

OMG- is there ANYTHING that Nepenthe is not good for???????? BIG SIGH.

Susie, seeing how women, in general, outlive their husbands, we're all pretty much dying alone . . . that's why I have made arrangements to be committed to live in the same mental old age facility as my best friend. That way we can keep each other company and complain to each other about how our children never call and that the food taste like crap.

I'm coming too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If I must clog my arteries it MUST be with double CREAM in some sort of cake!!!!!!!!

Agreed! But I must say my 2nd choice would be FRIED CLAMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

They do that there?? Can I bring in whatever I want and exchange it for something better?? I'm sure I've got some leftover stuff in the drawer and I can thing of much better drugs to have lying around than old antibiotics.

OMG...me too! I know EXACTLY what I want, won't take but a minute to exchange!!!!!!!

[blueeyedmanda]

Egads- first, sarah's pregnant then she's not and then Amanda's pregnant and then she's not but then reveals she's "trying" which would explain why she's so perky every morning!!!!!!! :lol:

Dem meow meows is SMART. I think our female is a serial killer plotting to kill us all. Actually she's leaning over my shoulder as I type this and I KNOW she can read.

Speaking of meow-meows.....mine has found me and is now kneading into my blanket I am sitting with....I am not sure Lucky knows how to read but he tries to type you guys messages!

John and I have started to try for our family, and hopefully things will work out.

[jerseyangel]

John and I have started to try for our family, and hopefully things will work out.

I hope so, too

How exciting!

[blueeyedmanda]

Now the cat has fallen asleep on me....I must smell good or something.

[jerseyangel]

Now the cat has fallen asleep on me....I must smell good or something.

Aw--sounds real warm and cozy.

[elye]

Well...talk about warm and cozy...I'm lying on the couch with the laptop propped in front of me, and Gus is sprawled across my legs and lap, his massive curly head on my chest. Snoring.

[blueeyedmanda]

my ghetto arse neighbors kids (whom I had vented about months ago on here) are setting off fireworks in the backyard..lighting them and tossing them out their bedroom window....these kids are 19yrs old...dont ya think they are a little old for that?????

Scared my poor Lucky and he fled the room. Lucky loves crawling on my lap when I am on the computer (laptop) I think the warmth is what makes him stay.

[Green12]

Agreed! But I must say my 2nd choice would be FRIED CLAMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mine would have to be anything from the land of dairy, cheese, cheese, and more cheese, ice cream, cream!!!

John and I have started to try for our family, and hopefully things will work out.

Well...talk about warm and cozy...I'm lying on the couch with the laptop propped in front of me, and Gus is sprawled across my legs and lap, his massive curly head on my chest. Snoring.

Dogs, cats, and laptops make perfect heating pads.

my ghetto arse neighbors kids (whom I had vented about months ago on here) are setting off fireworks in the backyard..lighting them and tossing them out their bedroom window....these kids are 19yrs old...dont ya think they are a little old for that?????

Sadly, no.

Well, maybe for fireworks.

I have a couple neighbor boys who are 20, 21. I don't know how many times I am awakened by them doing something terribly loud in the middle of the night.

I so want to open the window and scream "shut up" or anonymously call the police, but I'm scared it will get traced back to me

[elye]

Mornin', Sillies!

my ghetto arse neighbors kids (whom I had vented about months ago on here) are setting off fireworks in the backyard..lighting them and tossing them out their bedroom window....these kids are 19yrs old...dont ya think they are a little old for that?????

Are people....permitted legally to have fireworks there? Whoaaa...this is scary....

[blueeyedmanda]

Morning Sillies

So remember how I was talking about the ghetto kids. I am leaving early today so John and I drove seperate cars to work. When he walked out to his car the gas tank was open. He said the car drove very funny too. There are fireworks all over the parking lot. We pay outrageous amounts of rent...I can pay half that and go down to the city and live in the same conditions...nuts! Our rental place never does anything about it. We were told they were moving out but it has been 3 months now and they are still there....I am scared to really stay there anymore. These people freak me out.

[dlp252]

Now the cat has fallen asleep on me....I must smell good or something.

Ah, I miss having a live heating pad, lol!