The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

[jerseyangel]

Evening sillies,

I have found a new very-un fun activity. House Hunting....sounds like it would be fun....not so much.

any of my silly friends got room at their house for a quiet married couple and an overly big lovable feline?

I meant to comment before, but got busy....

Amanda--I think investing in a home is a wonderful idea for you and John. From what you've said, you already spend a good chunk every month on rent--and once you pay that rent, the money's gone. Like everyone else has said, you will begin building equity.

Find a realtor that you trust and get along with--you will be spending a lot of time in contact once this thing gets rolling--ours is fabulous, but we're too far out of your area for me to recommend him.

Our son was your age when he bought his first home two years ago. It's already gone up in value. Good luck with the house hunting

[blueeyedmanda]

Thanks Patti-have fun painting as well. It won't be a good weekend to paint, not warm enough to open windows to air out the rooms.

[DingoGirl]

OMG!

the talk of paints and coloUrs makes susie very pleased and excited. You see, *I* am the dork that goes into a paint store, looks at the samples, walks up to the guys and announces.....I can guess what pigments are in this one: lamp black, yellow ochRE, and ultramarine. And I am some sort of savant with this as I am nearly always right, and they always ask me if I have worked in a paint store.

I have invented several paint coloUrs.......wanted my guest room in Monterey to be a very soft, moody and tranquil grEy/blue/green, with soft white wainscotting. So.....I made repeat treks to the paint store..... bought about seven quart samples.......tried each.....not right. Quite laborious and frustrating. So, sick of the whole thing, I went and bought a whole gallon of this khaki-ish coloUr. Still not right. So then.....I bought a five-gallon container and poured - I think - all of them in there together, adding a bit of this and that. UNBELIEVABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Everyone stopped in that serene, beautiful room, every single person (female) said "what coloUr is this!!" and it became famous - Monterey Guest Room Blue is what it's called, and one could not quite tell whether it was grEy, green or blue, depending on time of day. My absolute favorite color and greatest paint coup of all time.

I can still duplicate it and may put it in the guest room here. I also invented the dining room colour at House of Terror - another smash success and I have plenty of that left. INvented my living room coloUr here - no less than seven paints I think, for a light cafe au lait/dark cream/light caramel color. SMASHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I always paint in semi-gloss, as the lustRE is really lovely.

See, ready-made paints usually have no more than three pigments, and I needed much more depth and pigmentation, no flatness of coloUr could I endure. The colours shift with the light, and are really beautiful. I always scour Home Depot for the $5 "mistake paints" and in fact have several in my garage just now, preparing to invent the Dining Room Vanilla Cream.

Restoration Hardware has some very, very good paint colors, but they are pricey. Silver Sage is quite famous.....that was the coloUr I was recreating in my guest room.

and Emily - guess what!!!!!!!! I am considering teh lightest blush pink - ballet slipper/petal pink/blush cream in my bedroom. 'Twill have to be invented, of course.

GOOD GAWD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Could talk color theory all day.

but PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There is a much more serious crisis happening presently, adn that is, I no longer know how to talk to men. at all. I have lost my mojo.......I was up half the night worrying about this. Urgent measures are to be taken. gah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[jerseyangel]

OMG Susie--Silver Sage! I love that coloUr....used it in a bathroom a couple houses ago.

Your creations sound fantastic--I wish you could come here and work with me on this whole thing...

Sorry re: the mojo--but I personally think it hasn't gone anywhere. I just can't believe you wouldn't know what to say to a man--are you sure you're not overthinking?

[elye]

Susie!

We are kindred spirits. I have NEVER used paint straight from a can on any wall, ever. Always a mixture. And because I am a painter painter, I become very excited when the mixed colours stand out a little as I'm going...just like the walls are a huge canvas. So, often my walls have areas that look subtly like an oil abstract. Quite enchanting, I feel, but I have seen people squint and stare uncomprehendingly at my walls when visiting. Bah! They do not feel it......

All of my life I have treated my makeup the same way. Never have I used a bought eye shadow as is...it is always mixed with others. I have a palette onto which I have glued several shades, and my face is yet another canvas. Cannot help it....must mix.....

....Ah, lamp black...one of the banes.....

[jerseyangel]

Emily and Susie--alas, I wish I shared your talent for coloUr

[Mtndog]

Well-I have some sad news- no Uncle Ray jokes for a MONTH! He had the nerve to go on vacation with my aunt in Florida! HARUMPH!!!!! And he took MY funny with him too!

Ooooh, more spreadsheet action!

Well...gotta take our action where we can get it!

My arseuveur is now mostly yellowish...a coloUr that speeds metabolism, therefore I expect my arse to become considerably smaller over the next few days.....

My arseuver was red, yet NO shrinkage :( I'm going to file a complaint against the coloUr commision.

OMG!but PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There is a much more serious crisis happening presently, adn that is, I no longer know how to talk to men. at all. I have lost my mojo.......I was up half the night worrying about this. Urgent measures are to be taken. gah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NO...I refuse to believe it! Just talk to men like you talk with us

Here's a color joke for you (sort of!):

A kindergarten teacher one day is trying to explain to her class the definition of the word "definitely" to them. To make sure the students have a good understanding of the word, she asks them to use it in a sentence. The first student raised his hand and said "The sky is definitely blue". The teacher said, "Well, that isn

[blueeyedmanda]

I am an avid oil painter myself, my favorite subject to paint....Lighthouses! I usually enter the county fair. My favorite lighthouse painting I did, I had a night sky and did fireworks and they reflected off the water. If anyone ever wants to see my stuff, I can pm you the link.

[DingoGirl]

OMG Susie--Silver Sage! I love that coloUr....used it in a bathroom a couple houses ago.

Your creations sound fantastic--I wish you could come here and work with me on this whole thing...

Sorry re: the mojo--but I personally think it hasn't gone anywhere. I just can't believe you wouldn't know what to say to a man--are you sure you're not overthinking?

Patti - I LURVE helping people w/ their coloUrs, I wish I COULD come and help! But...you've already used Silver Sage - susie is so excited about that - - so you are on the right track, coloUr-wise. Pratt and Lambert makes some of the finest paints, as well. Some of the most expensive around - which is why I've never owned any. But....you can buy a small quart and have Home Depot TRY and recreate these fantastic coloUrs (which then require tinkering a bit.....which is why you need Emily and me!)

and OMG - you're right - I AM over-thinking the male talking thing!!!!!!!!!!! I'm askeert - - because you hardly ever get a LIVE ONE......so when it happens - someone interesting and lovely - good gawd - - I PANIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Too much pressure!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bev - - yes - - I was pondering last night why I am so funny in writing and have lost my phunny whilst talking with boys men. Problem solved - - I'll bring a laptop with me evreywhere and write it all out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All of my life I have treated my makeup the same way. Never have I used a bought eye shadow as is...it is always mixed with others. I have a palette onto which I have glued several shades, and my face is yet another canvas. Cannot help it....must mix.....

Is there ANY other way? we ARE kindred spirits!

Emily and Susie--alas, I wish I shared your talent for coloUr

I think you do! Stick with Restoration Hardware and you can't go wrong.

My arseuver was red, yet NO shrinkage :( I'm going to file a complaint against the coloUr commision.

:lol: Yes, file away!!!!!!! OMG - I am waiting for some apparition to appear on me arseuver.......waiting......hoping........maybe Matthew McConnaughey will show up?

and Uncle Ray has LEFT US for a MONTH!? the audacity......he did NOT take your phunny, oh no he dit-n't!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOVE the joke........

gotta go - movie w/ mommy. she has been begging for weeks........I can hardly endure seeing a movie in teh daytime on a Friday but....it makes mommy happy.

SEE YOU LATER SILLIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[blueeyedmanda]

When I do buy a new place...I will need help painting, shall we have a paint party?

[Green12]

Yep--the paint company calls it "Mountain Getaway"

Oooh I like that name Patti, sounds beautiful.

Amanda, that's exciting about the house hunting!

I watch quite a bit of HGTV and they have several shows about this very process. It's fun to see what's out there in the different markets and what the different couples choose.

Translation, I have no life

[Darn210]

Trying day sillies . . . first day in a week that my back was actually feeling better (laid on a heating pad and OD'd on ibuprofen yesterday). . . however, yesterday my daughter hit her head at school. Then after her snack she said she thought she was going to throw up. Then getting ready for bed she told my husband that she was dizzy. I had two pieces of the puzzle, he had one . . . but didn't know. So when he causually mentions it to me, alarm bells go off . . . so we get her up a couple of times during the night - she was so groggy I don't think she remembers. I go in her room at 7:00 to get her up for school and she's sleeping on the floor. I asked her why and she said because her bed was hot. I decided to keep her home and take her to the pediatrician. By the time we get in, she is now running a fever of 101 . . . well, that eliminates the theory of a concussion. They do a flu test on her after I mentioned that she got the flu last year despite having a flu shot. So once again, she has the flu even though she had the shot in November. WTH!!????!!! Why do I drag my kids in kicking and screaming for a flu shot if they are going to get the flu anyway!!!

Anyway, sorry for the rant . . . spent almost $265 at the pharmacy for four rounds of Tamiflu for the family and Xalatan for Josie's glaucoma. Happy Valentines honey, I got you some Tamiflu. We now have both ice cream and sherbet in the house because DAMMIT, I deserve it!!! . . . oh, apparently I wasn't done ranting. . .

OK colours ??? My mom is a slightly tinted off white kind of person . . . barely a tint o' green through most of her house with a barely tint o' yellow in the kitchen. I painted my daughter's room a dark electric blue (which looks great for a kids room) and asked mom what she thought and the answer was something like "It looks better than I thought it would".

When I was painting the kids' rooms shortly after moving into this house, my mom had come to stay for about a week to keep an eye on the kids so I could paint uninterupted. The kids were 2 3/4 and 3 1/2 at that point. So while I was painting, the kids came into the room. I asked what they were doing and where was grandma. And they answer "She's sleeping and we can't wake her up". Talk about movin' fast . . . I raced down the stairs and there was mom . . . she was indeed sleeping (Thank God) and she was indeed hard to wake up. Had to threaten to fire her at that point.

[jerseyangel]

When I do buy a new place...I will need help painting, shall we have a paint party?

Yes--let's start by practicing this weekend at my house

I watch quite a bit of HGTV and they have several shows about this very process. It's fun to see what's out there in the different markets and what the different couples choose.

Translation, I have no life

Sure you do, Julie

I'm addicted to House Hunters, too

Susie said--dit-n't

[elye]

My favorite lighthouse painting I did, I had a night sky and did fireworks and they reflected off the water. If anyone ever wants to see my stuff, I can pm you the link.

Amanda!! I absolutely want to see them!! PM me, please!

and OMG - you're right - I AM over-thinking the male talking thing!!!!!!!!!!! I'm askeert - - because you hardly ever get a LIVE ONE......so when it happens - someone interesting and lovely - good gawd - - I PANIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Too much pressure!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Susie, just curious......do you use the same number of exclamation points when speaking to guys that you do when writing to us? Could be something there....

Trying day sillies . . .

Oh, Janet, yuck. Well, the flu's a better diagnosis than a concussion, but then the rest of your family won't catch a concussion. Do you find that Tamiflu keeps the flu at bay?

"She's sleeping and we can't wake her up". Talk about movin' fast . . .

Okay, so hedgehair is gone....a lovely cut and very nicely styled. So, it looks great, and I've just been out shovelling and picking up Gus poop for the last half hour. Before that I was cleaning the inside of my car. What ridiculous things to be doing whilst my hair looks unusually lovely. I must insist on an evening out! Yes, I will not waste a nice hairstyle.....

Hmmm...movie? Nah, 'tis dark, no one will see the hair. Dinner? Possibility. Skating on canal? Bah, no way, as hair will be squashed and ruined under hat or hood, and wind will dishevel things irreparably.

[jerseyangel]

Trying day sillies . . .

Wow--I guess so, Janet. How frightening.....glad she didn't have a concussion--but the flu--ugh Poor thing--and after having the shot, too. Hope the rest of you stay healthy and your daughter bounces back quickly

Skating on canal?

Careful now Emily--your tush is still multicoloUred from the last spill

I vote for a nice, safe dinner....maybe candlelight to softly illuminate the lovely 'do?

[~alex~]

I have invented several paint coloUrs.......wanted my guest room in Monterey to be a very soft, moody and tranquil grEy/blue/green, with soft white wainscotting.

OMG - that sounds beautiful. Wainscotting is so classy yet inviting. I remember overhearing some classmates in first year university and they were talking about how they would really feel grown up and that they'd "made it" when they had a job and could buy a BMW and go on trips to Hawaii and those types of things and all I could think was that I would know I would feel all grown up when I had a house with wainscotting and crown molding. We have the crown molding but no wainscotting so I guess I'm not all growed up yet.

Emily, I enjoyed your dissertation on the different colours and the feelings they invoke. Interesting! I remember going on a field trip to the city police station and jail in grade 1 and they showed us the holding cell and it was painted pink and they said that it was to help keep the prisoner calm. I went home and asked my mom if we could repaint my bedroom because "only prison cells are painted pink!" So we painted it blue and I've never gone pink again.

Amanda, that is very exciting that you're starting to look for houses. It's an overwhelming process but a fun and exciting one too. Signing the mortgage stuff made me kind of nauseated but paying mortgage payments is so much more meaningful than rent payments. It's basically like investing money. Good debt, good debt, good debt was my mantra when I got overwhelmed with the money aspect of things.

I'm having my dad, brother and my grandpa over for supper tonight!!! Me and my four favoUrite guys in the world - I couldn't ask for a better evening. We're going to play Nintendo Wii after supper and maybe watch a movie. Good times.

[Mtndog]

I am an avid oil painter myself, my favorite subject to paint....Lighthouses! I usually enter the county fair. My favorite lighthouse painting I did, I had a night sky and did fireworks and they reflected off the water. If anyone ever wants to see my stuff, I can pm you the link.

Yes, please!!!!!!!!!!!

When I do buy a new place...I will need help painting, shall we have a paint party?

OH MY GAWD!!!!!!!!! I am the LAST person you want to paint. I love to decorate (fancy myself an amateur interior decorator) and play with colors but the last time I painted, my parents banned me from ever painting again because it was so messy! Picking out furniture? I'm your lady. Decorating with antiques? Oh, pick me pick me! Deciding on luxury bedding? You betcha! Arranging flowers? OH YEAH.....but I will never paint again

Translation, I have no life

Julie- Hold me, I'm askeert. Does someone here have a life? If so, WHO is it?

Oh, Janet, yuck. Well, the flu's a better diagnosis than a concussion, but then the rest of your family won't catch a concussion. Do you find that Tamiflu keeps the flu at bay?

Okay, so hedgehair is gone....a lovely cut and very nicely styled.

Oh Janet, as my husband likes to say, you guys have really been taking it in the pants lately!

I hope EVERYONE gets better soon!

Hedgehair? I wake up EVERY morning looking like Open Original Shared Link

It's true, I wouldn't tell you no lies!!!!!!!

[jerseyangel]

I'm having my dad, brother and my grandpa over for supper tonight!!! Me and my four favoUrite guys in the world - I couldn't ask for a better evening. We're going to play Nintendo Wii after supper and maybe watch a movie.

Sounds great! Have fun!!

[blueeyedmanda]

Amanda!! I absolutely want to see them!! PM me, please!

I will send them later tonight, they are on my home computer

[Darn210]

When I do buy a new place...I will need help painting, shall we have a paint party?

So here is how you paint . . . silly thread style:

Obtain one yeti.

Hose him down with paint in the coloUr of your choice.

Take him to room to be painted.

Let him "shake like a dog" flinging paint everywhere.

Repeat until satisfied.

(tarps are recommended for furniture and carpeting)

[elye]

Careful now Emily--your tush is still multicoloUred from the last spill

Yes, 'tis true.......however, on the field trip I crashed to the ice as a result of flagrant showing off, and there would be none of that with DH. He can skate circles around me, and does an AWESOME manly stop--blades screeching, ice spraying magnificently, body in an enviable lean...he nauseates me, really.

I vote for a nice, safe dinner....maybe candlelight to softly illuminate the lovely 'do?

Man, it looks so uncharacteristically good right now, it's like, candlelight shmandlelight...I need a big spotlight on this!

I went home and asked my mom if we could repaint my bedroom because "only prison cells are painted pink!" So we painted it blue and I've never gone pink again.

I'll bet you've never craved a snack while in bed!

I'm having my dad, brother and my grandpa over for supper tonight!!! Me and my four favoUrite guys in the world - I couldn't ask for a better evening. We're going to play Nintendo Wii after supper and maybe watch a movie. Good times.

Oh!! What fun, Alex! You and the guys. I am dying to try a Wii game. They sound like great fun. Which one are you playing?

[Mtndog]

So here is how you paint . . . silly thread style:

Obtain one yeti.

Hose him down with paint in the coloUr of your choice.

Take him to room to be painted.

Let him "shake like a dog" flinging paint everywhere.

Repeat until satisfied.

(tarps are recommended for furniture and carpeting)

YESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That IS the answer! and your avatar is flipping hysterical!

Alex- That soUnds great (can't resist aggregioUs, random capitalization of u's). Have fun with the boys! I played with a Wii (wee ) once and it was SO fun!!! We played a boxing game and I got crazy! I get competitive in strange situations (weeing, skee ball, go Karts).

I love having my dad over for lunch/dinner because no matter what I make, he claims it's the best hee's ever eaten. I could make the man a paper bag sandwich with sandpaper on the side and he's love it. You know, the way to a man's heart and all that!

[elye]

Jaaaaannnnet!!! That AV!!

So here is how you paint . . . silly thread style:

Obtain one yeti.

Hose him down with paint in the coloUr of your choice.

Take him to room to be painted.

Let him "shake like a dog" flinging paint everywhere.

Repeat until satisfied.

(tarps are recommended for furniture and carpeting)

Or, bring Jess along with the yeti, and she'll employ some electrodes to get the flinging really going, into intricate but spontaneous-looking patterns.....

[nikki-uk]

So here is how you paint . . . silly thread style:

Obtain one yeti.

Hose him down with paint in the coloUr of your choice.

Take him to room to be painted.

Let him "shake like a dog" flinging paint everywhere.

Repeat until satisfied.

(tarps are recommended for furniture and carpeting)

Optional: take rag and scrunch flung yeti paint for the softer look,...or....'brush' it out

OMG!!!! ...so much to comment on all the painting talk....but have NO ENERGY ...suffice to say *I* always choose the coloUrs in my home and know instantly what shades goes with what (well I think so anyway )

GAD..exhausted.....WHAT'S WRONG with me ......weakly moving to couch to watch American Idol

Carry on sillies........

[jerseyangel]

Aw Nikki

Feel better