The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

[elye]

Nikki!!! - the needle in the spine!!! . . . not so bad, I tell ya'!!!

Janet, I second this....

'Tis a glorious thing, that needle........

[nikki-uk]

Janet, I second this....

'Tis a glorious thing, that needle........

OMG!!!! You bunch of wusses!!!! (sp?)

GIRLS!!! I am sooo disappointed in you

(Still not having a needle in me spine thank-you!)

Looking forward to seeing Em's new av of poodle oodle #2

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY !!!! (t'was in March over 'ere)

Will also left me (his first) deceased present - mousey is no more

Nikki did screech at hubby to dispose of it !!!!

Will wondered why his Mum didn't like the furry l'il gift

[Darn210]

OMG!!!! You bunch of wusses!!!! (sp?)

. . . and under the circumstances, I have no problem with this label!!!

[elye]

OMG!!!! You bunch of wusses!!!! (sp?)

GIRLS!!! I am sooo disappointed in you

(Still not having a needle in me spine thank-you!)

Well.....having done it BOTH ways, I will say that the needle in spine hurt like s@!t going in, and then there was sixteen hours of...nothing, like....nothing. No urge to bear down, no rush and pull of the baby in her final descent....nothing. The specialist essentially told me when she was crowning, so that I could try and have a look. Certainly something missing.

However, there was also AN INSURMOUNTABLE AMOUNT OF AGONY missing.

If I were doing it again, I'd go in with a drug-free attempt. Jack's birth was au naturelle, and I lived through it.

Fitting talk on Mommy's day! How was everyone else's labours? Universal Mother Patti?

[jerseyangel]

Fitting talk on Mommy's day! How was everyone else's labours? Universal Mother Patti?

Yes! Fitting talk

Let me see if I can remember back that far

My first was a "textbook" labor and delivery. No drugs, 8 hours from start to finish, good thing I was young

The second was a bit trickier....was in labor all Labor Day weekend (no lie)...went to the hospital on Saturday after spending the day at the State Fair and going into labor shortly after, stayed overnight and was sent home as things weren't progressing. 6 PM Sunday night, went back to the hospital, the baby was finally born by C-section at 3 AM Monday morning. I was out cold for the actual delivery so the first time I saw Matt, he was all wrapped up in Mark's arms

I did, however experience the needle--last year for my hysterectomy I was getting over a cold, so they didn't want to have to put a tube down my throat....I was petrified, and made them promise that I wouldn't wake up until it was over.

[Darn210]

Fitting talk on Mommy's day! How was everyone else's labours?

First time was a C-section after a "failed" non-stress test. Was awake the whole time. Started "feeling" them messin' around with my innards. They've got drapery so the docs can't actually see my face. My husband says "Are you feeling that?" I said, "Yes, a little". All hands flew into the air and anesthesiologist (who had left to prep somebody else) was paged stat, then they doped me up so well that I wasn't feeling anything "down there" for about 12 hours.

Second time was VBAC, I went into labor with some really wimpy contractions but they were five minutes apart. Doc sent me to the hospital and said "Don't let them put you in a bed, do a lot of walking" so I got there and they put me into a bed. Contractions got farther and farther apart. I was suppose to be induced three days later so since the ball was rolling, they decided to shoot me up with pitocin. Had the monitor across my belly in a bad spot so they didn't think they were getting good contractions and kept upping the pitocin until I was in one long continuous contraction. I was in so much pain that they grabbed a passing anesthesiologist (I'm not sure where he was headed, but he wasn't the one that was suppose to take care of me) . . . if I wasn't married . . . or perhaps even . . . if my husband wasn't in the room, I would have kissed him full on the mouth.

But other than that . . . . . . it was a piece of cake.

[Jestgar]

Gads.

Listening to those who have given birth should be mandatory for teenagers. Would certainly make them think twice about any risks they're taking.

[elye]

Well.......

Dh took both kids out last evening to get all the groceries for the dinner they were planning for me tonight. They picked up beef ribs, baby potatoes, asparagus, yummy exotic salad ingredients, and a very expensive Australian pinot. They got home, and Will asked Jack to put the two big bags of groceries in the fridge downstairs.

This afternoon, I guess DH went downstairs to get all the stuff and start preparing....I hear some loud swearing rippling up from the floorboards.

Jack had put all the stuff in the freezer.

Even the $$$$$$$ pinot.......

So, he was back out at Loblaws at 4:30 pm.........

All in all, a lovely day.......

With my two cats, two kids, two dogs......

[curlyfries]

How was everyone else's labours?

DH's 4 yrs in the Air Force was over and he was getting out. We were moving back home to IN. Baby due Nov. 15. Plane reservations made for Dec.3 for me & baby. Brother-in-law flying over to help DH with the U-Haul. Baby 2 weeks late. I took castor oil to speed things up. Went into labor that day. At the hospital DH has to hold a tray for me to puke in (multiple times) Dr gives me something to make me feel good. I keep falling asleep, going immediately into dreams, waking up saying bizarre things because I think the dreams are real. Plenty awake when it's time to push, after a few tries the dr keeps telling me to push but I've lost the urge. He goes in with forceps and when he sees the head, realizes that the cord is wrapped around the baby's head..twice. He immediately sticks his fingers between the cord and the baby's neck and cuts the cord. I wasn't able to push because the cord had been holding the baby back. DH had been taking graphic pictures the whole time DS was blue at first but bounced back quickly---a perfectly healthy baby! He wa 4 days old when we got on that plane.

DD couldn't be outdone, so she came a month early. This time DH is in the Nat'l Guard going thru officer's training. I'm supposed to shop for a maternity dress to attend his graduation. He will be leaving for his last 2 weeks of training in a few days and my water breaks. Really it just kind of leaks. (maybe it was the boat ride I took ) So we go to the hospital and they wheel me in and I keep saying, " ...but I'm not in labor...I don't feel anything". But it eventually progresses...and I start having contractions. But after 11 hours the dr says if nothing happens in another hour, he'll make it happen. She comes on her own. Just about the time i'm thinking I can't handle it (no meds this time), out she comes. She weighed 6 lbs 4 oz, but had complications so had to stay in the hospital for about a week. DH had to leave us (had permission to be a day or two late, but that was it if he wanted to graduate). She made me miss my baby shower but she got to attend the graduation!

[nikki-uk]

OMG!!!

Graphic tales of pain and birthing!!!!

Well.......

Dh took both kids out last evening to get all the groceries for the dinner they were planning for me tonight. They picked up beef ribs, baby potatoes, asparagus, yummy exotic salad ingredients, and a very expensive Australian pinot. They got home, and Will asked Jack to put the two big bags of groceries in the fridge downstairs.

This afternoon, I guess DH went downstairs to get all the stuff and start preparing....I hear some loud swearing rippling up from the floorboards.

Jack had put all the stuff in the freezer.

Even the $$$$$$$ pinot.......

So, he was back out at Loblaws at 4:30 pm.........

All in all, a lovely day.......

With my two cats, two kids, two dogs......

The Ripper strikes again!!

That's boys for you!!!!!!!!!

I notice Em that you have 2 of most things......will (geddit ) you be getting another hubby?????

[Darn210]

OMG!!!

I notice Em that you have 2 of most things......will (geddit ) you be getting another hubby?????

GAHHHHH!!!!!! She's getting ready for Bev's ark!!!!!

[blueeyedmanda]

Hi Everyone! What a rainy ugly Monday....sure wish I was home in bed.

Landen is almost crawling!!! He can creep through my house now. I can tell he loves being mobile. He scratched his moms eye yesterday morning by accident...now she has a corneal abrasion and spent the night in the ER instead of on the floor being a nurse. This morning, she can barely even open her eye.....its not good!

Its back to work for me, and I wish it was still the weekend....guess don't we all? With all the mothers day plans this weekend had flown by I wish I had more time to get things done.

Hope you all enjoyed Mothers Day...thanks for all the warm wishes from you guys for me. I appreicated them

[elye]

Good Monday morning, Sillies!

Well, am taking Elsie in to be clipped this afternoon, so we'll be able to see what she really looks like....and how thin she really is. We can feel some serious bones in her hips, and I'm bracing myself for when this mass of hair comes off. I also believe that she was not being given enough water - - you should have seen the way she attacked the water bowl when she got here. Jack timed her, and she drank for six minutes straight. Every time I put the water back down that day, she attacked it the same way. Now it's not happening....things seemed to revert to normal behavior fairly quickly.

I got her from the nicest farming couple....but I think they were controlling things too much for a dog that's reached a year old and is completely house trained.

GAHHHHH!!!!!! She's getting ready for Bev's ark!!!!!

I'll say. Two husbands.....Gaaaaaaahhhhhh.......

Why is there still polygamy anywhere in the world? What man would ever take wish to take advantage of a law that allows them SEVERAL wives? Like, more than one?! Boggles my mind.....

[jerseyangel]

Listening to those who have given birth should be mandatory for teenagers. Would certainly make them think twice about any risks they're taking.

That's so true, Jess....a little straight talk would go a long way.

Jack had put all the stuff in the freezer.

Even the $$$$$$$ pinot.......

OMGawd Poor kid--I'll bet he felt terrible.

Landen is almost crawling!!! He can creep through my house now. I can tell he loves being mobile. He scratched his moms eye yesterday morning by accident...now she has a corneal abrasion and spent the night in the ER instead of on the floor being a nurse. This morning, she can barely even open her eye.....its not good!

Yea! for Landen--you'll be chasing him around in no time Hope his momma's eye is better soon!

Mornin'Sillies Woke up to a nasty day--high winds and cold rain What a change from last week.

Emily--can't wait to see a pic of Elsie after her haircut

[blueeyedmanda]

Mornin'Sillies Woke up to a nasty day--high winds and cold rain What a change from last week.

I know those winds were rough last night. I couldn't believe it....sounded like a hurricane at time...lots of power outages around here but thankfully not us.

[Daxin]

Good to know I'm not the only one who woke up to rain and grossness outside. Tried to convice my DD that a skirt was going to be too cold to wear to 'school'.

Hope all you mommies had a great Mother's day.

[elye]

Good to know I'm not the only one who woke up to rain and grossness outside. Tried to convice my DD that a skirt was going to be too cold to wear to 'school'.

Hope all you mommies had a great Mother's day.

Hey!! A new Silly, and it's a GUY!! Wait....Ryan, perhaps you've posted in Sillyville before, in which case, my apologies for not remembering you. Welcome to this utter madness!

Um.....do you know anything about anal glands?

No winds here to worry about lifting up skirts, thankfully.....

[Daxin]

Um.....do you know anything about anal glands?

Can't help you there....I leave that up the the Vet, but thankfully I've never had to deal with it.

I've posted here before, but have been fairly inactive on the board for some time.

[jerseyangel]

Hope all you mommies had a great Mother's day.

Thank you, Ryan--it's so good to see you back!!

[Darn210]

Can't help you there....I leave that up the the Vet, but thankfully I've never had to deal with it.

I've posted here before, but have been fairly inactive on the board for some time.

Welcome back Ryan . . . what made you come back??? You heard about us, didn't you? We're quite famous, you know . . . at least in our own minds. We're trying to make a run at the OMG thread's top-thread status and we need all the help we can get. Hope you stick around.

Gland you didn't panic at Emily's anal gland question. She uses it to scare away the weak at heart.

Emily, did you take into account the extra de-gland-izing you're going to have to do now that you've got another dog??? And where did you put her bed?

[nikki-uk]

I know those winds were rough last night. I couldn't believe it....sounded like a hurricane at time...lots of power outages around here but thankfully not us.

Amanda!!

Nice to see you!!

Ok, I don't like to boast....but it's 28C here.....BLOOMIN' GORGEOUS WEATHER!!!!!!!

(sorry I had to get that out of my system....nice weather in May shall probably NEVER happen again here this Millenium )

OMG!!...was that ...... .....a Ryan sighting?????????

[blueeyedmanda]

So I am heading out for the afternoon, got to take John to the dentist and then I am picking up Landen, poor Jen cannot see at all....so he will stay with us again. So hopefully I will poop in later.

bye Sillies!

[tom]

Spine-needle? Count me in!

Bev's Ark!!

Ok, I don't like to boast....but it's 28C here.....BLOOMIN' GORGEOUS WEATHER!!!!!!!

Well quit boasting in metric if you want it to have any impact uhhhh .. . 28C? .. . .80 somethin'?

Ooooooo that DOES sound hot for London in May!!

I don't know if it'll turn out true - seems WAY too early - but they're talking about a couple days of 95F here Thu/Fri!!!

Typically SJ has only a few days that hot ALL SUMMER. (It's not like we're Phrezno!)

Aha! There's Susie. I was gonna say "where's Pseuzee?"

Figured a non-poop-in Sunday meant Janie must've had one rip-roarin' humdinger of a Mom's Day.

Itchies any better?

[DingoGirl]

GOOD MONDAY MORNING SILLIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi Susie

How are the itchies?

Hi Patti......and happy Post-Mother's Day to all!

itchies - grrrrrrrrr - - better but still crazy-making......... I did sumfin' that's ill-advised and stopped the steroids after five days. I know, I should complete the course......but my doctor is so strict and probably won't prescribe them again for the NEXT inevitable course of the stuff - after the NEXT visit to Last Chance.... so I'm saving them for that......

Keep yer own . . . even if you have to rig it . . . oops, I spilled a glass of milk on the floor . . . darn it, the ballcock is malfunctioning. I shall have to go to Lowes and buy a new one so the toilet doesn't keep running . . . believe me, it'll be worth it.

:lol:

So, I meant to ask . . . what was it that tipped the scales for your hubby? Are you still walking around nekkid?

Janet is a kook........

OK....now I understand why everyone was talking about ballcocks when I popped in one time

*snort* Yup........ya never know what will POP UP here..........

It's bizarre....I just don't know...

Perhaps it's been because I haven't been nekkid.......

:lol:

To an optimist, the glass is half-full.

To a pessimist, the glass is half-empty.

To an engineer, the glass is the wrong size.

........and to a gluten-brained bipolar, sometimes there was NO glass at all........

Peter. Painting lines in the parking lot. What fun!

Just wanted to add that my sweet boys left me something small and dead for Mom's day. Aaaawwwww.

that is so sweet.......... Weezee gave me the usual, lots of hand-holding and stinky-mouthed kisses.

Jack had put all the stuff in the freezer.

Even the $$$$$$$ pinot.......

So, he was back out at Loblaws at 4:30 pm.........

:lol: oh dear..........

Good to know I'm not the only one who woke up to rain and grossness outside. Tried to convice my DD that a skirt was going to be too cold to wear to 'school'.

Hope all you mommies had a great Mother's day.

RYAN!!!!!!!!!!!!! where've ya been? (Ryan was a regular contributor to the madness on the OMG thread, way back when - was it nearly two summers ago now that we all lost our minds?

Gland you didn't panic at Emily's anal gland question. She uses it to scare away the weak at heart.

Emily, did you take into account the extra de-gland-izing you're going to have to do now that you've got another dog??? And where did you put her bed?

I'm finding Janet particularly phunny today......

part two later......

[elye]

Gland you didn't panic at Emily's anal gland question. She uses it to scare away the weak at heart.

Yessssss!!! Ryan behaved as though I'd asked him about how his weather is, and not about his knowledge of anal glandular functioning ...so he's a keeper.

Emily, did you take into account the extra de-gland-izing you're going to have to do now that you've got another dog??? And where did you put her bed?

Sure did. I'll be making up double-lined flowcharts for you all quite shortly....

So I am heading out for the afternoon, got to take John to the dentist and then I am picking up Landen, poor Jen cannot see at all....so he will stay with us again. So hopefully I will poop in later.

bye Sillies!

Amanda!! I do hope Jen's eye is okay......