Jump to content
This site uses cookies. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. More Info... ×

  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):

    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Our Content
    eNewsletter
    Donate

The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

TriticusToxicum

Recommended Posts

Ridgewalker Contributor
Ridgewalker
Posted
:o:lol: :lol:

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

OMG Jess, THAT little double entendre didn't occur to me until YOU laughed! :lol:

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


  • Replies 51k
  • Created
  • Last Reply
jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
I've heard that the long pizzles take quite a while to eat

This is where an individual container of Faux Shizzles might just come in handy ;)

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

So what is the deal with the weather....first it is almost 100 degrees now today it is barely 70....and it is soooo windy....my skirt almost did a Marilyn Monroe quite a few times...! It feels like 50 out too, John who is always Hot complained when we were at lunch that it is too cold and he had to come back into the hospital....

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
So what is the deal with the weather....first it is almost 100 degrees now today it is barely 70....and it is soooo windy....my skirt almost did a Marilyn Monroe quite a few times...! It feels like 50 out too, John who is always Hot complained when we were at lunch that it is too cold and he had to come back into the hospital....

I love it like this! I got so much done this morning :D

Green12 Enthusiast
Green12
Posted
Opos--phorgot to mention....I talked to Jhudy this morning (we were on the horn for an hour and a half! B) )--she is having computer problems which is why she hasn't been around lately.

Patti, how nice you got to visit with Judy :) I was wondering where she has been.

Hope she gets her computer problems fixed.

Glad you guys got a little break with the heat :) We are heading into the high 90s for a spell starting tomorrow :wacko:

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
Patti, how nice you got to visit with Judy :) I was wondering where she has been.

Hope she gets her computer problems fixed.

Glad you guys got a little break with the heat :) We are heading into the high 90s for a spell starting tomorrow :wacko:

Thanks, Julie :D

Ugh--now you're getting a heat wave...I know it's summer, but it seems like it just gets hotter every year. (sigh)--stay cool the next few days :)

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted

:lol: Sarah! :lol:

I just read a post of yours in another thread--and you said "phunny"! :lol:

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


Mtndog Collaborator
Mtndog
Posted

Was it something I quacked???????????????? :ph34r:

Where are all you loon-atics?

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

bev- love the new avatar!

tom Contributor
tom
Posted
see Avatar

<----------------------

Please note appearance of Emily's Devil arse duck bruise :P

<---------------------- here's another devil duck for ya!!

:wickedsmilehornedface:

Mtndog Collaborator
Mtndog
Posted
<---------------------- here's another devil duck for ya!!

:wickedsmilehornedface:

Do you own him??????????? I am MADLY in love with these devil ducks. Must buy one for each of you toot sweet!

Make your pick:Open Original Shared Link

Emily- Perhaps your bruise occurred as a result of the Open Original Shared Link??????

Mtndog Collaborator
Mtndog
Posted

Seems uncle Ray has been possessed as his joke of the day (Ray of the Day?) is quite devilish :ph34r:

Turpentive versus Holy Water

A little boy was sitting on the curb with a gallon of turpentine and shaking it up and watching all the bubbles.

A little while later a Priest came along and asked the little boy what he had.

The little boy replied, 'This is the most powerful liquid in the world, it's called turpentine.'

The Priest said, 'No, the most powerful liquid in the world is Holy Water. If you take some of this Holy Water and rub it on a pregnant women's belly, she'll pass a healthy baby.'

The little boy replied, 'You take some of this here turpentine and rub it on a cat's arse and he'll pass a Harley Davidson!'

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted
But are you taking the Jug O' Urine wif you????

That's our Em--off to the the gallery, jug in tow....what a woman! :D

Oh please, no, not the big orange jug o' pee!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Em, say you didn't take it with you!

OMG........ :lol::lol::lol:

Sometimes I suspect that I subconsciously orchestrate these situations so that I'll have unbelievable, ridiculous stories to relay to you guys.....

So, I COULD have dumped the pee that I'd begun to collect and start again tomorrow....but NOOOOOOOOO. I figure, "I've already started, tomorrow I may be at work for an extra` while, today's been easy so far, I'm gonna continue"..... Even though I'm spending the afternoon with my son's school at the NATIONAL GALLERY..... :huh:

Might this be a place where you do NOT want to be carrying around a receptacle of your urine, albeit small? Yes, I should think so. :rolleyes:

So, I did NOT bring along the big orange jug (which, incidentally, I fill right to the top, always, and often start another one - - that's how much water I consume -- gad), but a small empty margarine container in case I had to go.

I was asked by security on the way in what it was for (had to empty my big purse for their perusal). The woman just stared at me when I told her it was to collect my urine. Surprisingly, she didn't radio for security, didn't reach for the phone....so we're good.

Of course, by 2:30, I have to go rather badly. I went in the container, closed it very tightly, wrapped it with about five tight elastic bands, and wedged it in my bag so it wouldn't move.

Guess what? They inspect big bags when you leave (I guess you could be stuffing little paintings and sculptures in them).

It was a man this time. I didn't even give him the chance to ask me what was in the container - - I came right out and said, "Some of my urine is in here". Now, I think the most prudent, and therefore proficient, of security workers would have asked me to open it.

But he didn't. :rolleyes::rolleyes::lol:

So, that was my afternoon. You can imagine what The Ripper's classmates think of me.......

Opos--phorgot to mention....I talked to Jhudy this morning (we were on the horn for an hour and a half! B) )--she is having computer problems which is why she hasn't been around lately.

Patti! Is Judy coming to the Psilly Philly Psummit? :)

Jestgar Rising Star
Jestgar
Posted

Pfizer Announcement

Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in

liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage

suitable for use as a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to

literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this

a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of 'cocktails',

'highballs' and just a good old-fashioned 'stiff drink'. Pepsi will

market the new concoction by the name of: MOUNT & DO.

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
I didn't even give him the chance to ask me what was in the container - - I came right out and said, "Some of my urine is in here".

This has to go down in history as one of the best Sillie moments of all time! :lol:

Judy may come--that day is also her wedding anniversary, so she's kinda playing it by ear for now. I'm really hoping she will come, though :)

Who else is coming?

MOUNT & DO.

Jess! :lol:

dlp252 Apprentice
dlp252
Posted
It was a man this time. I didn't even give him the chance to ask me what was in the container - - I came right out and said, "Some of my urine is in here". Now, I think the most prudent, and therefore proficient, of security workers would have asked me to open it.

But he didn't. :rolleyes::rolleyes::lol:

I often don't know what's going on in here, but I always manage to drop in on a page with something like this!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
I often don't know what's going on in here, but I always manage to drop in on a page with something like this!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

You simply must stop by more often, Donna! :D

Jestgar Rising Star
Jestgar
Posted
You simply must stop by more often, Donna! :D

Or not. Maybe it's that much funnier if it all seems abstract and out of the blue.

Maybe we should all choose some number and only read the posts divisible by that number, say, read every seventh post. Then we could all have that surreal sort of experience normally only achievable with controlled substances or liberal phaerie drops.

dlp252 Apprentice
dlp252
Posted

Patti = :wub:

Maybe we should all choose some number and only read the posts divisible by that number, say, read every seventh post. Then we could all have that surreal sort of experience normally only achievable with controlled substances or liberal phaerie drops.

Hum, good way to describe how I feel when I DO drop in! :lol:

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
Maybe we should all choose some number and only read the posts divisible by that number, say, read every seventh post. Then we could all have that surreal sort of experience normally only achievable with controlled substances or liberal phaerie drops.

I wouldn't last a half a day :lol:

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted
Or not. Maybe it's that much funnier if it all seems abstract and out of the blue.

Maybe we should all choose some number and only read the posts divisible by that number, say, read every seventh post. Then we could all have that surreal sort of experience normally only achievable with controlled substances or liberal phaerie drops.

OMG...Yes.........to give us that hallucinogenic, out-of-control mind space, without the heroin! :rolleyes::lol:

Ridgewalker Contributor
Ridgewalker
Posted
:lol: Sarah! :lol:

I just read a post of yours in another thread--and you said "phunny"! :lol:

B):lol:

So, that was my afternoon. You can imagine what The Ripper's classmates think of me.......

:o You... are so... BRAVE! :lol: :lol: :lol:

Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted
:o You... are so... BRAVE! :lol: :lol: :lol:

NO . . . NOT BRAVE . . . NUTS!!!! Who here actually think rubber bands are going to keep urine in a MARGERINE CONTAINER for OraclePete's Sake???!!!!??? Of course the security guard didn't open it . . . it was probably leaking and he could tell it was full of WEE!!!

Going purse shopping tomorrow??

Green12 Enthusiast
Green12
Posted
You simply must stop by more often, Donna! :D

I've been trying to twist Donna's arm to drop in the Silly thread more :D:D

Janet said "for OraclePete's sake" :lol::lol:

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted
NO . . . NOT BRAVE . . . NUTS!!!! Who here actually think rubber bands are going to keep urine in a MARGERINE CONTAINER for OraclePete's Sake???!!!!??? Of course the security guard didn't open it . . . it was probably leaking and he could tell it was full of WEE!!!

Going purse shopping tomorrow??

:lol::lol:

It was soooooo tightly elastic-wrapped, and wedged into my purse, and I was SOOOOO obsessively keeping said purse in exactly the same upright position on my shoulder, that there was no leakage. Yes, leakage would easily explain why the security guy did not open the container. But there was no visible (or feel-able) urine. So this really does beg the question: Why in HELL did he not open it, or at the very least, ask ME to??! This is a huge, tourist-filled government building, ripe fer a bombing, hostage-taking, er sumfin' huge.....

So, anyone who plans on taking down the National Gallery of Canada, or stealing some small, multi-million-dollar artifact that would fit nicely into a margarine container, simply do so and remark to the security staff that you've collected some of your urine in it....should be no problem......

:lol:

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Go to topic listing

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Celiac.com:
    Join eNewsletter
    Donate
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):
    Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):



    Celiac.com Sponsors (A17-M):



  • Recent Activity

    1. Jacki Espo
      - Jacki Espo replied to Itsabit's topic in Dermatitis Herpetiformis
      3

      SkinSafe

      For me I gave up oat products and it finally cleared. I had a whole body reaction for months. Two additional culprits for me: shared grill at a restaurant or a shared toaster. Hope you have relief soon.
    2. Russ H
      - Russ H replied to Itsabit's topic in Dermatitis Herpetiformis
      3

      SkinSafe

      It can take between 6 months and 2 years for the dermatitis herpetiformis rash to resolve. The symptoms of dermatitis herpetiformis arise from deposits of certain antibodies building up in the skin. These deposits attract immune cells leading to inflammation and blistering. It can take 10 years for the deposits to be reabsorbed although symptoms resolve long...
    3. trents
      - trents replied to Itsabit's topic in Dermatitis Herpetiformis
      3

      SkinSafe

      Welcome to the forum, Linda! Many on this forum can sympathize with you. It can be extremely difficult to get reliable information about gluten when it comes to meds, supplements and oral hygiene products. This is especially true since so much of this stuff is generic and comes from over seas. I will deflect with regard to your question about meds...
    4. Itsabit
      - Itsabit posted a topic in Dermatitis Herpetiformis
      3

      SkinSafe

      Hi. I’m 70 years old, and a 22 year survivor of head and neck cancer treated with chemo-radiation, which resulted in non-existent submandibular salivary glands and extreme dry mouth and altered oral mucosa. I have been using dry mouth toothpaste, Rx oral dentrifices and moisturizers for years. I’ve recently been diagnosed with severe celiac dermatitis her...
    5. trents
      - trents replied to Cathijean90's topic in Introduce Yourself / Share Stuff
      1

      I’m terrified it’s too late for me😭

      Welcome to the forum, @Cathijean90! I went 13 years from the first laboratory evidence of celiac disease onset before I was diagnosed. But there were symptoms of celiac disease many years before that like a lot of gas. The first laboratory evidence was a rejected Red Cross blood donation because of elevated liver enzymes. They assume you have hepatitis...
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):


  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      128,315
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748
    Gramma Dukes
    Newest Member
    Gramma Dukes
    Joined
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121.1k
    • Total Posts
      70.8k
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):


  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • Jacki Espo
      SkinSafe

      By Jacki Espo · Posted

      For me I gave up oat products and it finally cleared. I had a whole body reaction for months. Two additional culprits for me: shared grill at a restaurant or a shared toaster.  Hope you have relief soon. 
    • Russ H
      SkinSafe

      By Russ H · Posted

      It can take between 6 months and 2 years for the dermatitis herpetiformis rash to resolve. The symptoms of dermatitis herpetiformis arise from deposits of certain antibodies building up in the skin. These deposits attract immune cells leading to inflammation and blistering. It can take 10 years for the deposits to be reabsorbed although symptoms resolve long before this.
    • trents
      SkinSafe

      By trents · Posted

      Welcome to the forum, Linda! Many on this forum can sympathize with you. It can be extremely difficult to get reliable information about gluten when it comes to meds, supplements and oral hygiene products. This is especially true since so much of this stuff is generic and comes from over seas. I will deflect with regard to your question about meds and oral products but take you in another direction. Have you tried a low iodine diet. Iodine is known to exacerbate dermatitis herpetiformis and some find that a low iodine diet helps reduce the number of outbreaks. By the way, have you had your celiac antibodies retested recently? If they are elevated that might be a clue that you are getting gluten in your oral hygiene products or meds.
    • Itsabit
      SkinSafe

      By Itsabit · Posted

      Hi. I’m 70 years old, and a 22 year survivor of head and neck cancer treated with chemo-radiation, which resulted in non-existent submandibular salivary glands and extreme dry mouth and altered oral mucosa. I have been using dry mouth toothpaste, Rx oral dentrifices and moisturizers for years.  I’ve recently been diagnosed with severe celiac dermatitis herpetiformis. I was being treated with oral Dapsone, but it was not effective and I developed some serious side effects. So, the medication was stopped and I was started on Doxycycline (another antibiotic) for inflammation. I’ve been using Rx Betamethasone steroid ointment with little to no effect. I have tried every oral and topical antihistamine treatment available OTC. None have touched this horrible relentless itching. That is my history.  Now to my question. Does anybody know about gluten free toothpastes and mouth moisturizers? I ask because a very common dry mouth brand stated to me that they were indeed gluten free. But as I am not getting any better with my dermatitis herpetiformis, I was wondering if I was getting glutenized some way other than diet as  I have been following a strict clean gluten free diet, but I am not seeing any improvement at all. So, I started looking up the toothpastes and moisturizer ingredients individually and nine (9) of the eleven (11) or so listed showed up as   containing gluten or that may have gluten! Am I getting glutenized orally by these products?  As an aside, I checked on my favorite lavender scented baby lotion which is supposed to be gluten free, but many of those ingredients when investigated separately, show they  do contain or may contain gluten as well. I stopped using the lotion. But I cannot forgo my dental care. I was unable to get any information from the manufacturer of my current brand of chewable multivitamins either. They told me to check with my doctor. If THEY don’t know what’s in their product, how do they think a PCP will?  In light of all this, I am confused and angry that I might keep getting contaminated with gluten through products I am using that are supposedly gluten safe. *I should also state that I have a nickel allergy since I was about 12-13 years old. And I developed a contact allergy to latex (gloves) when I was a student nurse at 19 years old.  I know and I’m sorry that this is so lengthy. I’m trying to do everything I can to combat this condition, and I’m feeling very confused, anxious and angry about not getting adequate information as I try to educate and advocate for myself. I’m hoping someone here is more knowledgeable than me of how to navigate through all of this. Can anyone offer any advice?  Thank you for your time.  Respectfully,  Linda
    • trents
      I’m terrified it’s too late for me😭

      By trents · Posted

      Welcome to the forum, @Cathijean90! I went 13 years from the first laboratory evidence of celiac disease onset before I was diagnosed. But there were symptoms of celiac disease many years before that like a lot of gas. The first laboratory evidence was a rejected Red Cross blood donation because of elevated liver enzymes. They assume you have hepatitis if your liver enzymes are elevated. But I was checked for all varieties of hepatitis and that wasn't it. Liver enzymes continued to slowly creep up for another 13 years and my PCP tested me for a lot of stuff and it was all negative. He ran out of ideas. By that time, iron stores were dropping as was albumin and total protein. Finally, I took it upon myself to schedule an appointment with a GI doc and the first thing he did was test me for celiac disease. I was positive of course. After three months of gluten free eating the liver enzymes were back in normal range. That was back in about 1992. Your story and mine are more typical than not. I think the average time to diagnosis from the onset of symptoms and initial investigation into causes for symptom is about 10 years. Things are improving as there is more general awareness in the medical community about celiac disease than there used to be years ago. The risk of small bowel lymphoma in the celiac population is 4x that of the general population. That's the bad news is.  The good news is, it's still pretty rare as a whole. Yes, absolutely! You can expect substantial healing even after all these years if you begin to observe a strict gluten free diet. Take heart! But I have one question. What exactly did the paperwork from 15 years ago say about your having celiac disease? Was it a test result? Was it an official diagnosis? Can you share the specifics please? If you have any celiac blood antibody test results could you post them, along with the reference ranges for each test? Did you have an endoscopy/biopsy to confirm the blood test results?
×
×
  • Create New...