Cannot Control My Cheating...please Help.

[LadyCyclist87]

I'm sure the title of this topic caught your eyes a bit off guard. I don't know if I'm the only person to do this on an almost addictive, compulsive basis, but I guess I'll see through the responds I read.

I've been diagnosed with Celiac Disease and a low IgA-antibody deficiency for as long as I can remember. When I was an infant, my mother used to give me certain food that would ultimately result in various GI problems, rashes, headaches, etc. The bad effects lead up to the diagnosis of my diseases. So, throughout my whole childhood, I could only eat wheat-free, gluten-free, egg-free, and dairy-free foods. Adequate substitutes were found, and I was healthier as opposed to my earlier years.

But, at around the age of 16, I grew mildly curious of what certain food tasted like, so I ate many things I couldn't have. Surprisingly, I haven't found many horrible side effects (at the time). I suppose my body was more or less asymptomatic at the time. But since then, I have been dealing with various personal problems and stresses in my life; "cheating" has turned into something I seem to do in situations of extreme distress. When I'm upset or angry, I cheat. When I'm stressed out about something, I cheat. When I'm feeling generally "down" about things, I cheat. It has turned into something I used to do about 1-2 times each month into something I do every single day. Now, I will be 21 years old in 3 months, and can (shamefully) admit that I have been destructing my body for about 4.5 years now. Although my symptoms don't be seem to be too terrible, I still experience the chronic fatigue, headaches, & runny/stuffy noses. Recently, I have noticed that the joints in the fingers of my right hand are constantly sore, and it's getting hard to do things such as gripping objects (a possible sign of RA).

I know I need to do something about this. It's puzzling me how something that's making me physically ill can, at the same time, be a mental stress reliever. I'm terrified of admitting this secret to any one in my family or close friends, but I know I need to help myself out somehow. I recognize I have a problem, and that I'm plain STUPID for getting myself into it in the first place. Is there any way that I can cure the damages I've made against myself just by sticking straight to my old diet now? And, aside from seeking psychological support, is there really any reason I need to see a doctor?

It seems so lame telling my secret over a website. But I'm scared, and I don't want to feel alone right now, and I need to know there's a way around this.

[Sweetfudge]

Wow, what a difficult time you must be going through. First of all, let me say that you aren't alone. We here are all your friends, and let me attest from personal experience that there are a lot of caring, understanding people here, who can help you work through this.

As far as telling any of your family or friends about this, I would say, think of someone you can trust, who will be empathetic to what you're going through. You need someone to commit to, someone to hold yourself accountable to. As strange as it may sound, even knowing that person would be disappointed in you not sticking to your goals can help a lot. I've been struggling the last few months with my allergy to dairy. Finally, I was tired of being sick from it, so I told my husband that I was not going to eat it anymore. And I haven't since. It's been so hard, but knowing he's aware of my goal has helped me to keep it.

I feel like I can relate to what you're going through. For one thing, I'm an emotional eater, and understand how when you're stressed or upset, food is a good comfort (at the time). I also used to struggle with my self esteem, and was a compulsive cutter. I understand that urge to do something you know is going to hurt you, but nothing else will satisfy it. This is where I would strongly agree that some sort of psychological help is crucial. Even if you are embarrassed, know that a counselor would be able to help you overcome your "cheating" and help you to find more constructive things to do, better thought processes, etc. It may not get easier to fight it, but you'll feel so much better once you've beat this.

You CAN overcome this! I believe you can! If you ever need someone to talk to, please send me a PM! Hang in there

[MELINE]

hello

I can imagine what you are going through. It is really difficult when something is in our minds. We just can't get rid of the thought and we keep on doing the harmful habit whenever we are feeling stressed.

Let me tell you something. I used to have a really really really bad and unhealthy habit that had to do with food. It was a kind of obsession and me too I only had to do it when I was feeling stressed, but gradually it became an everyday need. I was living a nightmare. the only way I managed to get rid of that, was to admit it to my best friend (believe me she was so shocked, she kept staring at me and telling me that I had to stop that thing immediately) . Then we had to work this out together. I promised her that everyday I would let her know if I cheated. And I did keep my promise. I cheated just once. That was about 2 years ago.

Would you like to make a journal on how you are doing and keep updating it with your everyday progress??? But this journal must be public...otherwise you are going to cheat again...maybe you can set a prize you will give your self when you are gluten free for 5 days (for example).Maybe we could all do that......cause believe me we all have our little obsessions......

Meline

[tom]

Is there any way that I can cure the damages I've made against myself just by sticking straight to my old diet now?

My joints aren't great but still are SO much better than before gluten-free.

So I do think a strict 100% gluten-free diet will help tremendously.

And I'm wondering if you've considered a hypnotherapist, like a smoker would, to help w/ quitting ingesting food that you know is harmful.

[linda7276]

I am new here too, and I can't say that I know how to help, but I think you took the first step in helping yourself and that is admitting that you have a problem. Probably a big step too, one thing that came to mind when I read your words, was self esteem, we often beat ourselves up with thoughts of low self esteem and eating to beat yourself up could be the same thing. I don't know, I'm certainly not a mental health professional, but I guess what I would say is don't be so hard on yourself. Every day is a new day and a fresh start, so if you can't do it today, you can do it tomorrow. Not that I'm saying you should procrastinate, but just to give yourself a break. You did a good thing for yourself today by posting your comment and reaching out for help. I think the journal is a good idea too. I feel for you and I'm sending you positive healing wishes. Linda

[torontosue]

I can certain ly understand how you must feel. However as a relatively newly diagnosed celiac (1 1/2 months gluten free) I feel SO much better now then I a few months ago at this point I can't imagine cheating but the feeling is still there. Just today I walked by my former chicken wing/beer restaurant and told my 14 yr old son we should go there for supper. He's the one who talked me out of it knowing I'd already prepared food at home that was safe and wouldn't have me hurting and sick for the next 4 days.

From what I'm told, you WILL slowly feel better as you rid your body of gluten-containing foods again. I know with each passing day I'm improvingand it's a great feeling.

Someone suggested rewardign yourself after 5 days of being gluten-free. I'd say go for it. Also, if after a week or so, you might start to feel the changes in your body, and when and if you DO cheat, you feel bad (physically I mean) afterwards, then maybe that will be all you need to make you not want to cheat anymore.

Good luck with it....hopefully admitting it to us is your first step to getting healthy again!

[Gluten-Free Guy]

I'm glad you were able to express your concerns to the group of friendly celiacs in this forum. There are many fine, supportive, knowledgeable people here.

I don't know where you live, but I would suggest joining a celiac support group located in your area. I have belonged to one for six years and it has made life much, much easier. If you don't have a support group in your area, you might consider starting one. Contact the Celiac Sprue Association for information (877-272-4272).

If you do your own cooking, it will be easier. There are many delicious gluten-free recipes from scratch and, thank goodness, the availability of good packaged mixes and frozen gluten-free foods is improving all the time. It's much better than when I was diagnosed six years ago. I'm sorry, but I'm only gluten-intolerant, so I can't address egg-free and dairy-free, but some of the products on the market accommodate intolerances to gluten, eggs, and dairy. Gluten-Free Essentials products accommodate all three intolerances (Open Original Shared Link) and, in my opinion, many of their products are good. There are also cookbooks that offer recipes addressing combined intolerances to gluten, eggs, and dairy.

You should be able to find acceptably tasty subsitutes for the same glutened foods you crave and cheat with.

It is very important that you stop cheating. Even if you don't always have an overt reaction to gluten you ingest, you are damaging your body internally. I don't remember where I found the following paragraph, but it conveys an important message: "The gluten-free diet must be carefully and continuously followed. When untreated, the disease can cause life-threatening complications. A delayed diagnosis or non-compliance with the diet places the patient at risk for developing associated conditions such as infertility, miscarriage, osteoporosis, fractures, certain types of intestinal cancer, lymphoma, or other autoimmune disorders. Continued consumption of gluten increases the chance of gastrointestinal cancer by a factor of 40 to 100 times that of the normal population."

You asked, Is there any way I can cure the damages by sticking to the diet? In my opinion, you will see remarkable improvement in a week or two as long as you are 100% gluten-free. From my reading, much of the damage celiacs experience can heal once the person remains 100% gluten-free. The key here is: 100%. That means you can never, never, never cheat.

People who monitor this say that the average time a celiac suffers before being diagnosed is 10 years, so your 4.5 years of cheating may not be a problelm. People heal once they're diagnosed. Also, the younger one is, the sooner one heals, so your age is very much in your favor.

You can take control. You can do it! We're all on your side.

[MELINE]

forgot to tell you that if you keep on cheating you have a bigger risk for other autoimmune diseases. your autoimmune system will keep on trying to attack gluten and you body will be exposed to all other diseases. you don't wanna be like some of us who have a ton of other health issues and food intolerances. I was misdiagnosed for 12 years, so in my endoscopy my doc was trying to find lymphoma. not a good feeling, believe me. So come on don't let your self be that unhappy! you don't want to have any more problems. Believe me celiac is the easiest of the autoimmune diseases. it has excellent prognosis. all the other autoimmunes don't sound good. you don't want to have them. I don't want to scare you, but I wish I did.......just for your own good. You are given the chance to know what you have and know how to deal with it. Don't throw it away.

meline

[Takala]

Not a doctor, and don't play one on the internet, but this sounds like your particular version of OCD, which we seem to have a tendency towards anyway.

The fact that you are not sticking to your diet is in turn creating a biological reaction that is not letting your stick to your diet.

Some of us were so old and already so screwed up by the complications that we were getting from decades of eating the wrong things, and so relieved that not eating gluten could make such a difference, that we are more highly motivated to stick to it, or at least only deliberately blow it like maybe once a year. You may have outgrown the egg and dairy problems, if you are not getting deathly ill from ingesting them, but if you're actually gluten intolerant and persist in eating gluten you are going to eventually get yourself in a world of trouble physically and emotionally.

Everybody has stress, it is how you react to it which defines you.

It really sounds like you are nutritionally deprived. Sugar and carbohydrate cravings are common with this disease because of minerals not being absorbed properly in the intestines. You should be taking a gluten free vitamin B complex, a gluten free calcium supplement, and a gluten-free magnesium supplement. These 3 things will help dramatically cut down the weirdo carbohydrate and sugar cravings, which are caused by a drop in blood calcium levels that the kidneys try to regulate by sending messages to the brain to eat something. Your brain does not translate this into "suck down 2 caltrates" but instead says FEED ME SUGAR COOKIES NOW. You need the magnesium to help the calcium be used properly. (I have also read enough of bad reactions to probiotics here and on other boards, that I would not recommend even trying supposedly safe ones unless you had everything else figured out to perfection. )

Now, as to another way to temper your cravings, try out a low carbohydrate, high fat high protein type of diet. I have done variations on these for years, and what they say is TRUE, if you're doing it correctly, you don't get the blood sugar spikes up and down, but you don't even get very hungry. This means each meal should have protein, vegetables, and fat and fruit. If you can't bear the thought of a vegetable for breakfast, remember you can always either drink vegetable juice and/or mix stir fried greens into scrambled eggs or omelettes. By fat I mean olive oil that you use for cooking, or coconut oil. Fruit is obvious. What you need to be doing is eating real things that provide chew time and fiber, the fiber will take longer to digest and make you feel more satisfied.

Many of us have found that we just can't eat the same number of servings of grain product the wheateaters have every day, even if we have found or made enough tasty subsitutes.

When you go anywhere, you should also be carrying safe snack food items with you, so there is never any excuse for not being able to eat if you need to. I just automatically throw a bag with gluten free snacks in the car whenever I go out. Half the time my spouse wants something out of it before I do. If I am going to a social thing I can make something gluten free to take with me. I would put up a gluten free rice pasta lasagne against a regular one anytime and challenge somebody to be able to tell the difference, I also can do another version with no pasta at all, using cabbage, and that is also good enough regular people will eat it thinking it's low carb. Hah.

I hope this gives you some ideas. Wheat's only been around North America for about 400 years, and really, the stuff is over rated as a food necessity.

[Juliebove]

First of all, I don't have celiac but food allergies. I had them most of my life but didn't make the connection of my symptoms to the allergies because the reaction wasn't immediate. And it took about two weeks to get all of the stuff out of my system. Now, just a speck of the offending food gives me all sorts of symptoms. So for me, there is no "cheating". I don't like to feel bad or get sick.

Somebody else I know who also has food allergies, does little to avoid eating those foods. She might not eat an actual egg. but will frequently eat mayo, pancakes, cake, or other foods with eggs in there. Since she has never laid off the offending foods for more than maybe a day or two so she doesn't make the connection. She probably never will. And will live out the rest of her life still whining about being sick to her stomach and all the respiratory infections and skin rashes she has.

[Live2BWell]

I have not yet been diagnosed with Celiac [but am fairly certain I have it.] I do, however, have an autoimmune disease, as well Diabetes - so, as for the "cheating," I can relate (I do cheat with my sugar and carbs. I justify my cheating because my diabetes is very well managed and I am in the non-diabetic range) and I also have used food for emotional gratification and psychological release/coping, rather than food as a means of bodily nourishment. For me, in the past, it was to the extreme (a full blown eating disorder) however, there is a broad spectrum of the ties between food and feelings, that are not necessarily eating disordered, rather somehow disordered eating.

I think to a certain extent, everyone in the world has their vice - what they turn to in times of stress, emotional turmoil, etc. Everyone has their "loophole" and for many the "loophole" is not psychologically or physically threatening. For others, however - it is. When that's the case, therein lies the problem.

And chances are, the problem is not a matter of mere willpower or mere choice. It's something a bit deeper. You certainly are not alone in this, I think it's great that you took the chance and shared with the forum!

It just so happens that cases like you (and and me) and many others, we literally cannot afford to cheat. We have much less leeway than others who may be able to afford it a bit more

Hang in there. I cannot offer you muc advice, but I can offer my own experience and empathy.

Anyway, below is something I thought you might find of interest, and might help in your not feeling so alone. I tried posting the link, but it did not work, so I am copy/pasting it (the references and copywright info is at the bottom of the article.)

*************

Recognizing an emotional eating pattern

When you are upset, do you reach for food? When you feel down, do you eat more sugar? Do you eat quickly, more than you intend to or mindlessly when upset? If so, you may have an emotional eating pattern.

It can be difficult to recognize an emotional eating pattern. If you are unsure, consider keeping a food log for a week: whenever you eat, record the day and time, what you were feeling before you ate, what you ate and how you felt after eating. You may notice a pattern of eating cheesecake when upset, for instance, or eating twice as much potato salad at dinner after a stressful day.

Food is linked to emotions

Food is closely tied to emotions. Traditional foods may evoke emotional memories or recollections of special occasions. Contentment is common after a good meal, and eating is connected to childhood feeding patterns and relationships with parents.

Food is also physiologically connected to mood. Carbohydrates trigger the release of serotonin in the brain, which has an anti-depressive effect. Hunger triggers sadness and irritability, which eating can alleviate.

Problems created by emotional eating

Emotional eating can have unpleasant side effects that pose challenges to your wellness. These include feelings of guilt after eating too much, for example, or difficulties staying within a desired weight range. Emotional eating may also be part of a disordered eating pattern such as binge-eating or bulimia. Emotional eating may also contribute to stress if it is used as a way to cope. Instead of coping directly with a source of stress, food may be used to reduce stress or deal with negative feelings. This avoidance-coping tends to be ineffective because the underlying problem is not addressed and continues to increase stress.

Are you concerned about emotional eating?

Recognizing an emotional eating pattern does not mean you have to address it. This pattern may be acceptable to you. If you eat emotionally only once in a while, eat healthy foods or eat small portions of unhealthy foods when you do eat emotionally, you may feel it does not pose a challenge to your wellness.

Changing an emotional eating pattern

Is your emotional eating pattern posing challenges for you? Are the same sources of stress making you feel upset and turn to food over and over again? Are you concerned about gaining weight? Are you ready to change this pattern? If so, consider the following recommendations. Discern true hunger from emotional hunger. Before you grab a bite, ask yourself if you are really hungry by using the H.A.L.T. acronym. Are you physically Hungry? If so, eat. Are you Angry or upset? Write your feelings down instead of eating. Are you Lonely? Call a friend. Are you Tired? Take a nap.

Eat well. If you are not eating enough calories, or if you are waiting too long between meals and snacks, you are more likely to eat too much of an unhealthy snack. In addition, as noted, hunger can trigger feelings of sadness or irritability which may lead to emotional eating. Aim for three meals and two to three snacks per day.

Notice when you are eating for emotional reasons. You may find that just recognizing that you are engaging in emotional eating will help you contain the problem.

Prepare for cravings. Keep healthy snacks on hand to grab when upset. Keep just one serving of sweets on hand for when you have a craving; having large stores of unhealthy items may make it easier to overeat when you are upset. Do not ban a food you crave; this can lead to a feeling of deprivation and to overeating when that food is available.

Use problem-focused coping. If you are upset, consider addressing the source of the stress directly. For example, what can you do to change a stressful situation with a co-worker?

Address your feelings. Write in a journal, talk to a trusted friend, talk to your physician about antidepressants, or consider counseling. Relaxation. If you are stressed, consider using a relaxation technique such as deep breathing or meditation instead of eating.

Mindful eating. In this practice, you focus completely on the full experience of eating a bite of food. Notice how a food smells, feels on your tongue or in your fingers, tastes in different parts of your mouth or sounds as you bite into it. This meditative technique helps you put the sources of stress out of mind for a moment and helps you fully enjoy eating.

Want more information or support?

The following books are excellent resources of tips and information about emotional eating:

[LadyCyclist87]

Hello everyone,

Let me just say that after reading the above comments, I felt so much better (and less alone) than I have in a very long time. I'm close to my family and get along wonderfully with them; I have 4 very close girlfriends that I'm grateful for everyday, but somehow you still feel alone when people don't know your secret (and you don't want to imagine the humiliation to follow). For those who did respond to my post, I'd like to thank you for your support, encouragement, and health information.

Gluten-Free Guy and Meline mentioned various health risks that I was putting myself against if I continued cheating. That is what I made me ultimately decide I needed to reach out, somehow, even if I can't do it personally yet. I cried when I realized the serious effects that cheating could have on me. It's still frustrating me how this is out of control, but there have been other obstacles I've been up against and have overcome. I do have a history of OCD and other self-esteem issues -- I figured most of this was resolved once I overcame some past obstacles, but it seems as though I still have some work to do in this area. What I'm scared about also is that, some days, the cheating seems to be the least of my problems I need to get over. But I DO know that it is vital that I get over it.

Quite a few people mentioned the idea of telling someone personally, even if he/she may be more disappointed to begin with. Today I made a promise to myself that I was going to tell one of my best friends I'm rooming with this upcoming semester. I could tell her now, but it's not going to be much of a help over the summer considering we don't live close by. I still might tell someone in my family, but my family also has some other personal issues that need to be worried about, and I don't want to burden any one more with my problem. I can handle it until I go back to school in a couple of months, especially now that I've found this website.

So, plan of action to stop cheating? I've been thinking about this, and I've decided that I'm going to invest in a gluten-free, egg-free, dairy-free recipe book and experiment cooking food that I can enjoy. It'll give me something to do over the summer when I'm not working and have some down time to myself. I'm listening to Takala and going to a health food store and purchase the minerals and vitamins I need to keep in my system while I'm getting back into the swing of things with my gluten-free diet. I'll continue things that I already love doing (biking, swimming, etc.) and have decided to keep a personal journal. Instead of keeping a public journal and boring you guys with my long, ego-centric entries (haha), what I'll probably do is update my progress (or drawbacks) on this board on a weekly basis. If I continue to do well, weeks will turn into months, and then...I won't need to keep updating. Hopefully in a week or two, just as someone who responded here suggested, I'll start to feel physically better.

Thank you so much for viewing this topic and responding. I really do appreciate your feedback, experiences, and advices. This sounds so corny to say, but it really did warm my heart to read all the responses. I'm on my way to doing something constructive -- instead of destructive -- for myself.

[Sweetfudge]

Wheat's only been around North America for about 400 years, and really, the stuff is over rated as a food necessity.

Very true

First of all, I don't have celiac but food allergies. I had them most of my life but didn't make the connection of my symptoms to the allergies because the reaction wasn't immediate. And it took about two weeks to get all of the stuff out of my system. Now, just a speck of the offending food gives me all sorts of symptoms. So for me, there is no "cheating". I don't like to feel bad or get sick.

This is a good point. Once you get everything out of your system, it will be a lot easier to NOT want to cheat, as you will probably be more sensitive to anything you come in contact with. In one way, a little ray of hope there

I cried when I realized the serious effects that cheating could have on me. It's still frustrating me how this is out of control, but there have been other obstacles I've been up against and have overcome.

It's ok to cry about this, believe me I have on many occasions. Went to vegas 2 yrs after starting the diet, and broke down in tears in front of my husband and friends because they wanted to order pizza at 2 am, and there was nothing on the room service I could eat except fruit.

It gets easier, but still, there will be those moments when all you want to do is throw a chair across the room. But having a good support system can really help you through those times.

So, plan of action to stop cheating? I've been thinking about this, and I've decided that I'm going to invest in a gluten-free, egg-free, dairy-free recipe book and experiment cooking food that I can enjoy. It'll give me something to do over the summer when I'm not working and have some down time to myself.

I think this is a great idea! This is one thing that really helped me through the process of letting go of gluten. I love cooking, always have, and was bound and determined to recreate my favorite recipes without gluten (and later on, without dairy).

This forum is a great place to look for recipes! I've spent countless hours reading through them . Allrecipes and Recipezaar are good websites as well, that have some fun recipes. In my experience, adapting to dairy free is pretty easy. I use soymilk and almond milk and haven't had a problem with making bread, pancakes, or gravy/soups. I'm sure egg free is relatively simple as well. I have some egg replacer product that I use occasionally when called for in recipes (or when I forget to go to the store and buy eggs ). Let us know what you're looking for, and someone here can usually help!

Glad you're feeling better about things! Best of luck to you

[emcmaster]

I see some fantastic suggestions and remarks have already been made, but I have my own $0.02...

Major props to you for reaching out and admitting this. Too often I feel that we in the Celiac community act like we aren't ever tempted to cheat. I don't believe it for a second when someone claims they're never tempted. They may not consider doing it, but it seems highly unlikely with all the great food and social situations that they aren't tempted.

When I was first diagnosed, I cheated more often than I should. I stopped that by making a deal with myself that I wouldn't cheat for 2 months, then 4, etc. After I'd felt so good for so long, I didn't want to mess that up.

Now I struggle with not cheating when I know without a doubt that I've been severely glutened. It takes me nearly 2 weeks to recover from a glutening and I get so angry that I have to live with the symptoms for 2 weeks when I likely didn't enjoy what I ate in the first place!

To overcome this, I've made more deals with myself. The longer you go without cheating, the more momentum you have and the harder it will be to give in.

Keep your head up. I truly believe that it must be harder for someone with milder symptoms to stay gluten-free. Eating gluten-free is very similar to the importance of eating a wide variety of fruits and veggies, lean proteins, and whole (gluten-free) grains to support your long-term health. You will not be healthy LT if you continue to cheat regularly.

[gfpaperdoll]

I can relate to Takala's post. Please get some blood work done to check all your vitamin & mineral levels. & a lot of us take B12 regardless of our tested levels - & a lot of us are low in D... I think that if you take B12 that you will not have so much stress.

please do not forget that gluten is addictive. So not all your doing... once you have it one day - you will automatically crave it the next. One of the reasons that our society is mostly overweight & the success behind the fast food places.

I mostly do not eat grains & totally think that they are for a "treat" only. But like a previous post you have to make sure that you get enough fat in your diet. I recommend things like avocadoes, coconut oil, cold pressed olive oil - not heated in cooking, but used in salad dressing or poured over a food. & nuts, almonds, pecans, & walnuts are on the top of my list - that is fresh, not roasted.

I also am dairy free & it is the hardest! I can eat butter. Can you tolerate butter - not margarine but real butter?

I also take food everywhere. Even if I am headed to the other side of town to eat out, I have something with me, you never know...

Then have a stash ready of safe "treats". you know something that is not all that heathly but fits the bill for something extra. Lets face it most of us eat disgustingly healthy diets, of salads, steamed veggies, & baked chicken & salmon. Now, if I could eat white potatoes I would go for homemade french fries with toppings!!! But since I cannot I go for the next best thing, which is fried sweet potatoes. I also make homemade fudge with dairy free chocolate chips. I make several versions... I use coconut milk as a sub for the milk, works perfect. I also sometimes add raisins, dried cranberries, dried cherries, & lots of chopped walnuts. I love to have bacon wrapped in a white corn tortilla on the weekends - you can add PB & jelly... Anyway, have something picked out before hand that you can really have but do not eat all the time - we have to build in our "treats".

yep, if this is the worst mistake that you have made at 22, you are doing good. hope you are better soon & having loads of fun!!!!

(grandmotherly thoughts from an old elder)

[tom]

Too often I feel that we in the Celiac community act like we aren't ever tempted to cheat. I don't believe it for a second when someone claims they're never tempted.

Is she calling me a liar?

JUST KIDDING!!!!! (Really I am!)

But seriously, there ARE many of us who had such a drastic array of pre-gluten-free debilitating symptoms & unexaggeratedly hellish existences, that the ONLY reasonable behavior IS to treat gluten as if it were ricin, anthrax or strychnine.

[gfpaperdoll]

I agree with Tom, I have an aversion to the stuff. Not helping the original poster, but I am never tempted by anything gluteny, but I am also not 22. I think when you are 22 the whole world is full of tempting things. At my age, I know what is best for me. I have filled my life full of things that make me happy & healthy & try to contribute, in some small way, something meaningful to my family & friends.

But I did not have this peace & happiness at 22. No I was so sick I did not think that I was going to live to be 30, & my doctors were sure of it. But hey, things change, thank goodness!!!!

[emcmaster]

Is she calling me a liar?

JUST KIDDING!!!!! (Really I am!)

But seriously, there ARE many of us who had such a drastic array of pre-gluten-free debilitating symptoms & unexaggeratedly hellish existences, that the ONLY reasonable behavior IS to treat gluten as if it were ricin, anthrax or strychnine.

Not calling anyone a liar.

I just find it hard to believe that no one smells freshly baking sweets and thinks, "Man, that smells good. Wish I could eat some." I define temptation as a desire (however faint) for something. There's quite a difference in being tempted and actually contemplating doing something.

[Guest mellan3]

I'm sure the title of this topic caught your eyes a bit off guard. I don't know if I'm the only person to do this on an almost addictive, compulsive basis, but I guess I'll see through the responds I read.

I've been diagnosed with Celiac Disease and a low IgA-antibody deficiency for as long as I can remember. When I was an infant, my mother used to give me certain food that would ultimately result in various GI problems, rashes, headaches, etc. The bad effects lead up to the diagnosis of my diseases. So, throughout my whole childhood, I could only eat wheat-free, gluten-free, egg-free, and dairy-free foods. Adequate substitutes were found, and I was healthier as opposed to my earlier years.

But, at around the age of 16, I grew mildly curious of what certain food tasted like, so I ate many things I couldn't have. Surprisingly, I haven't found many horrible side effects (at the time). I suppose my body was more or less asymptomatic at the time. But since then, I have been dealing with various personal problems and stresses in my life; "cheating" has turned into something I seem to do in situations of extreme distress. When I'm upset or angry, I cheat. When I'm stressed out about something, I cheat. When I'm feeling generally "down" about things, I cheat. It has turned into something I used to do about 1-2 times each month into something I do every single day. Now, I will be 21 years old in 3 months, and can (shamefully) admit that I have been destructing my body for about 4.5 years now. Although my symptoms don't be seem to be too terrible, I still experience the chronic fatigue, headaches, & runny/stuffy noses. Recently, I have noticed that the joints in the fingers of my right hand are constantly sore, and it's getting hard to do things such as gripping objects (a possible sign of RA).

I know I need to do something about this. It's puzzling me how something that's making me physically ill can, at the same time, be a mental stress reliever. I'm terrified of admitting this secret to any one in my family or close friends, but I know I need to help myself out somehow. I recognize I have a problem, and that I'm plain STUPID for getting myself into it in the first place. Is there any way that I can cure the damages I've made against myself just by sticking straight to my old diet now? And, aside from seeking psychological support, is there really any reason I need to see a doctor?

It seems so lame telling my secret over a website. But I'm scared, and I don't want to feel alone right now, and I need to know there's a way around this.

[ShayFL]

Im not tempted at all!

If I smell fresh baking bread, I am NOT tempted to eat that gluteny bread. I might think to myself that I will bake some bread when I get home....I might think wouldnt it be nice if I could eat bread like everyone else......but tempted to eat it...no.

[darlindeb25]

QUOTE (emcmaster @ Jun 28 2008, 09:16 AM)

Too often I feel that we in the Celiac community act like we aren't ever tempted to cheat. I don't believe it for a second when someone claims they're never tempted.

Well, I have been gluten free for 8 yrs now, and I honestly am NEVER tempted by gluten. I am intolerant of so many things now--I honestly can say, I am not tempted by any of them. Not feeling good is enough to stop me from being tempted. When I went gluten free 8 yrs ago, I had been so sick, for so long, that I was never tempted then to eat gluten!

Even now, when I walk pass the bakery in a store, the fresh baked bread doesn't make me want some, it kind of turns my stomach now. It makes me want to run the other way, it honestly does. I find this very sad. I do not enjoy any food anymore. I eat to live, where most people live to eat.

So, emcmaster, maybe you are tempted, but not all of us are. I do wish things were different for me, but that is not the same as being tempted!

[emcmaster]

I'm sorry, I truly didn't mean to offend anyone.

But now I'm incredibly jealous that there are people who don't wish they could eat gluten without getting sick/doing damage.

[darlindeb25]

I'm sorry, I truly didn't mean to offend anyone.

No offense taken. Me, on the other hand, can not understand how anyone would want to eat something that makes them so ill. I am being completely honest when I say I have never been tempted with gluten since day one. I was so sick, and for so long...when I finally had a reason why, I jumped for joy. I will say this, even though I have never been tempted to eat gluten, I have mourned the loss of it. I cringe during the holidays when every other commercial on tv is bringing the family together for a huge meal--I do miss the food.

[Katsby]

Well I'd be lying if I say I haven't been tempted or if I don't still drool over things. I don't cheat, though. Mainly because I get a very physical reaction almost immediately and it's not worth it. Lately I've been trying to find good tasting alternatives. I have been reading Gluten Free Girl's blog and Karina's Kitchen for yummy recipes.

Hang in there, try to stick to the diet, and know that food is not worth making yourself sick over. Good luck

[veggienft]

All addiction builds around sugar.

Stop ingesting it.

..