Jump to content
This site uses cookies. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. More Info... ×
  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.




  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):



    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):


  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Our Content
    eNewsletter
    Donate

How To Deal With Questions At Social Situations?


hilwacat

Recommended Posts

hilwacat Rookie

Hi everyone, it's been a year since I was diagnosed with Celiac and I'm feeling great. I've adjusted to the diet, and because I'm feeling so good I don't view it as a sacrifice.

The problem is that it seems at dinners and family gatherings someone will ask a lot of questions. I'm sure they do it because they care, but it makes me feel singled out and embarrassed. Even the most basic details this condition are, to say the least, unappetizing.

How does everyone deal with situation?


Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):



Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):



Pegleg84 Collaborator

Hi,

glad you're doing well with the diet.

I try to be open about the whole gluten-free thing, though not blibber on about it too much. You shouldn't be embarrased to talk about legitimate health problems, but of course, if you feel uncomfortable, just say that you don't want to get into the yucky details. (bathroom problems are not always appropriate for dinner talk). Stick you your comfort level, only answer questions you want to, and i'm sure your family and friends will respect you for that. At the same time, its good to make them understand what Celiac is and why its so important for you to eat gluten-free. that's my take on it anyway

good luck

Peggy

one more mile Contributor

I answer the questions. I start general then get more detailed if people are interested and seem to be learning. I figure my discomfort may help the person if they develop this illness or if another person they know had the illness. One of the reasons my mom is so accepting of this is because a friend of hers got it when pregnant and explained it to her bingo buddies.

Usually I find the word "irregularity" sounds better then mention the big D at meals. but only really refer to that if questioned a lot. Since this is genetic I am more then happy to help open my families eyes. I suspect that some of them have the same problem as I do.

Takala Enthusiast

I have an atypical reaction to gluten and it gave me such bizarre problems (another autoimmune arthritis, kidney problems, early bone loss, and neuro symptoms mimicking MS) almost nobody would believe me anyway, so it doesn't matter. I just say most of my problems resolved somewhat other than the fatigue and lingering nerve damage, and I'm stuck with some arthritic changes, so I'm very happy to be able to function again. If they want the gory details they can hear all about the kidneys, that would make anybody's eyes glaze over. Hmm, what else.... the brain lesions are a good one. You see, if I list everything, yet I look normal enough, it sounds like I am making it up. Oh well.

Storm Apprentice

I got asked recently if it was by choice that I am gluten free and I was just following a trend with the rich & famous!!

I also got told that "Gluten free is for wimps" .... but my reply was "No... not for wimps, I just don't enjoy spending an hour with my head down the toilet after I have eaten any gluten based meal"

I have not had any other smart comments, but if people ask, I will tell them. If they offer me food, I will ask for it's ingredients or how it was cooked before eating it. I am not embarrassed about having Celiac Disease.... for me, it's a diet that I have HAD to change to for my health, simple as...

I would and always will be honest. You shouldn't have to justify your food choices to anyone, but if people ask, then don't be embarrassed to say so.

lizajane Rookie
I got asked recently if it was by choice that I am gluten free and I was just following a trend with the rich & famous!!

I also got told that "Gluten free is for wimps" .... but my reply was "No... not for wimps, I just don't enjoy spending an hour with my head down the toilet after I have eaten any gluten based meal"

I have not had any other smart comments, but if people ask, I will tell them. If they offer me food, I will ask for it's ingredients or how it was cooked before eating it. I am not embarrassed about having Celiac Disease.... for me, it's a diet that I have HAD to change to for my health, simple as...

I would and always will be honest. You shouldn't have to justify your food choices to anyone, but if people ask, then don't be embarrassed to say so.

yuck, what idiots...

i, too, vomit with gluten exposure. but rather than go into throwing up... when people ask me about celiac, i tend to go with the overall disease and most serious consequences.

my most common questions are:

how did you get it all of a sudden/how did you know after so long (i am almost 34)?

celiac can be triggered by stress, trauma, surgery, illness, pregnancy... mine was probably my 2nd pregnancy because i have been feeling really tired and awful for about 4 years and finally, my body just couldn't take it anymore.

so you can just not eat bread?

no, gluten is in all sorts of things. like soy sauce and vinegar. it isn't an allergy that makes me get sick for a day and then it is gone. it is an autoimmune disease.

but what happens if you just eat it anyway?

because it is an autoimmune disease, the body responds to the foreign invader- which is gluten- so you can end up with lymphoma. so yeah, i work pretty hard to not eat it because i rather not get cancer.

mysecretcurse Contributor

Personally I love when people ask questions, and I love answering them. I have no problem talking about myself. ;) lol

It's really a good thing, because the more awareness is spread, the better our lives get.


Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):



Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):



mattathayde Apprentice

im pretty open with it as i dont care much, if i am trying to be polite i say "digestive issues" or "lower gi issues". it also helps when i explain that the gluten is going into the blood stream and that any one would have most of the other issues if they had gluten in their blood streams ( from i have seen in research). honestly i dont care what others think about it, i get sick if i eat gluten and i dont want to get sick and poison my body so if some one is going to be a prick, screw them

-matt

heathen Apprentice

It stinks to be the only one who is "eating funny," but the more people you can educate about this disease, the better it will be. And with 1 in 133 people having Celiac Disease, you might actually help someone get the diagnosis they need!

mysecretcurse Contributor

So true. A friend talking about gluten and her family's issues with it was what led to me discovering I was also intolerant. Thank God! I'd probably not be alive now otherwise.

one more mile Contributor
It stinks to be the only one who is "eating funny," but the more people you can educate about this disease, the better it will be. And with 1 in 133 people having Celiac Disease, you might actually help someone get the diagnosis they need!

How true! Just last night I started talking to a woman about a totally other topic and she mentioned that she might be gluten intolerant so I told her what I knew and mentioned this web page to her. I would have never thought she was one of us but I hope I helped her a little bit. Sometimes it just helps knowing there are others around me dealing with the same thing.

mattathayde Apprentice

when i talk to people that have a laundry list of med issues (that seem to at least kind of fit) i tell them to look at it, i would bet that a few of my friends a a lot of my family has it but of course they just kind of listen then say what ever

looking back there was a kid i met a few years back that now i know he either had celiac/gluten intolerance or chrons but either way i wish i could get in touch with him again to tell him to look at gluten-free cause he was really really bad, he would go through bottles of pepto, he killed 1/4 of an industrial sized one in like 2 days, i only was around him for a weekend but it seemed like this was very common for him

-matt

taweavmo3 Enthusiast

This is still a struggle for me.....I'm really, really shy and any attention on me makes me uncomfortable. So shy that I actually begged people NOT to throw me baby showers, lol. So getting bombarded with questions about a disease that causes mainly GI symptoms for me? I'd rather stick hot pins in my eyes honestly.

But, I try my hardest in hopes that someone will benefit from even hearing about Celiac. At my daughter's birthday party a few weeks ago, my neighbor mentioned how good the gluten free cupcakes were, and that set off a firestorm of questions! It was good though....turns out the hostess eats gluten free, and one of the moms at the party has Celiac on her husband's side of the family. So of course, we swapped diagnosis details. One of the other moms starting asking me a bunch of questions, b/c a kid she knows has symptoms.

It's easier to talk about my child than myself though.....I still get uneasy when I have to explain (over and over again to the same people usually) my diet to people at work. I wouldn't mind, except sometimes I get the feeling people just ask to be nosy, not b/c they really care, kwim?

This is awful, b/c it's totally innacurate I know, but if I'm just not in the mood to field a gazillion personal questions and don't feel like giving the Celiac tutorial, I just claim "allergy" and call it a day, lol. That's bad, but sometimes you just need an easy out!

grey Explorer

I know what you mean - I always hated birthdays in school because everyone would stare at you during the singing! For that matter, I never sent anything back or liked to ask too many questions of waiters, etc.

In some ways, celiac has been good for me, learning to do these kind of things; it's gradually getting easier. Although, sometimes, I will avoid a situation if I feel too overwhelmed to answer questions.

Mostly though, I enjoy talking with people about celiac if they seem interested. I think it's funny that I ended up having celiac when I'm so embarrassed about talking about digestive symptoms. The most I'll ever say is "GI problems". Nobody, except those who are dealing with stuff themselves, has ever gone further, and nobody's ever - even when they have a laundry list of symptoms - asked me more questions! Sometimes I'll say something like your body can't absorb nutrients from food - without the details. "Multisystemic autoimmune disorder" ... and mention symptoms like fatigue and migraines.

One thing to remember is that most people don't embarrass that easily about this stuff, so it's really about your comfort level. (And that that's important too).

And, I too, when in public will sometimes default to food allergies, or even just "funky food issues"!

Lucky you to have found some people to talk with.

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.


  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):



  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      127,877
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748

    Sasha bul
    Newest Member
    Sasha bul
    Joined

  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):


  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121k
    • Total Posts
      70.5k

  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):





  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):



  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • Scott Adams
      @Mynx, how long have you been gluten-free? I ask because many newly diagnosed celiacs react to many things, and often think their reactions are caused by gluten, when in fact, they are really caused by a combination of a sensitive gut due to damage, as well as additional food intolerance/leaky gut issues to other foods which may be temporary until their villi heal.
    • Scott Adams
      Many major brands of distilled vinegar in the USA, including Heinz white vinegar, are typically made from corn. In the United States, corn is a common and cost-effective raw material used in the production of distilled white vinegar. The process involves fermenting the sugars derived from corn into alcohol, which is then further fermented into acetic acid to produce vinegar. Distillation follows, which purifies the liquid and removes impurities, including any residual proteins or allergens. While the source of the vinegar (e.g., corn) is not always explicitly stated on the label, corn-derived vinegar is widely used in the food industry due to its neutral flavor and affordability. For individuals with gluten intolerance or celiac disease, distilled vinegar made from corn is generally considered safe, as the distillation process effectively removes gluten proteins. However, if you have concerns about cross-contamination or specific sensitivities, it’s always a good idea to contact the manufacturer directly to confirm the sourcing and production practices. Heinz, for example, has stated that their distilled white vinegar is gluten-free and safe for those with celiac disease, but verifying this information can provide additional peace of mind. The belief that distilled vinegar is gluten-free is rooted in the scientific understanding that gluten proteins, which are large and complex molecules, are generally too big to pass through the distillation process. Distillation involves heating a liquid to create vapor, which is then condensed back into a liquid form, leaving behind larger molecules like gluten proteins. However, the concern about cross-contamination arises from the possibility that gluten-containing ingredients may have been present in the liquid prior to distillation. While the distillation process itself is highly effective at removing gluten, the equipment used in production could potentially introduce trace amounts of gluten if not thoroughly cleaned between batches. For most individuals with gluten sensitivity or celiac disease, distilled vinegar is considered safe because the gluten content, if any, is typically below the threshold that would trigger a reaction. However, for those with extreme gluten intolerance or celiac disease, even trace amounts can cause adverse effects. This is why some individuals, like yourself, may choose to avoid commercially produced distilled vinegar and opt for alternatives like apple cider vinegar, which can be verified as gluten-free. The meticulous process of researching ingredients and preparing homemade products, such as ketchup, is indeed challenging but crucial for maintaining health and avoiding gluten exposure. It’s important to note that regulatory standards for gluten-free labeling vary by region, and in many places, products labeled "gluten-free" must contain less than 20 parts per million (ppm) of gluten, which is considered safe for the vast majority of people with celiac disease. Nonetheless, individual sensitivity levels can vary, and your approach highlights the importance of personalized dietary management for those with severe gluten intolerance.
    • Bebee
      I have been diagnosed with Microscopic Colitis (LC) for quite a few years, so I have been gluten-free and DF.  I would like to get tested for Celiac Disease because of the possibility of cross contamination and colon cancer.  And if you were hospitalized and didn't have a celiac diagnosis you could not get gluten-free food, I don't know if that is true or not.  Also because there is chance of colon cancer so I want to know if I have Celiac Disease and need to be on very restrictive diet.  The only testing I did was a sigmoid scope and Enter Lab but no gene testing.  I know I can go back to eating gluten for a few months, but I would worry you would have to stay home for the few months while getting gluten.  What other options do I have?  Should I do the gene testing?  Maybe through Entero Lab?  Any other tests?  How important is it to have Celiac diagnosed? Thank you! Barb
    • trents
      Take it easy! I was just prompting you for some clarification.  In the distillation process, the liquid is boiled and the vapor descends up a tube and condenses into another container as it cools. What people are saying is that the gluten molecules are too large and heavy to travel up with the vapor and so get left behind in the original liquid solution. Therefore, the condensate should be free of gluten, no matter if there was gluten in the original solution. The explanation contained in the second sentence I quoted from your post would not seem to square with the physics of the distillation process. Unless, that is, I misunderstood what you were trying to explain.
    • Mynx
      No they do not contradict each other. Just like frying oil can be cross contaminated even though the oil doesn't contain the luten protein. The same is the same for a distilled vinegar or spirit which originally came from a gluten source. Just because you don't understand, doesn't mean you can tell me that my sentences contradict each other. Do you have a PhD in biochemistry or friends that do and access to a lab?  If not, saying you don't understand is one thing anything else can be dangerous to others. 
×
×
  • Create New...