Allowance

[Juliebove]

From about age 2 on, I have given my daughter an allowance. I think it started at a quarter, just to teach her how to save. And I worked my way up from there. Currently she gets $5.00 per week. She is 11 but will be 12 next month. She feels she should get more. I am really not sure what is the right amount. I was thinking $6.00. She has gotten $5.00 for a couple of years.

My mom seems to think that $5.00 is waaaay too much but I am trying to be realistic. I am not really sure how much a candy bar costs these days since we don't really buy them much. When I was a kid my mom figured enough to buy a candy bar, enough to put in church and enough to save. Equally divided in thirds.

Well we don't go to church. And she doesn't really buy much. She is good to save the money and every once in a while she asks to put some in the bank. She does spend occasionally. Sometimes on toys, but mostly she has outgrown those. She does sometimes buy books, DVDs, CDs or computer games. She also get money and gift cards from relatives. Her most recent purchase was new patio chairs for me for Mother's Day.

Do you think $6 is too much? Too little? Just enough?

I was given a clothing allowance at age 13. That was back in the 70's and I think I got $30 every two weeks. Keep in mind that the very expensive jeans I chose to wear could be had for $10 a pair in those days. She hasn't shown much interest in clothing yet. Thankfully she is happy to wear whatever I find on clearance so long as it fits. She is also a dancer so most of what I buy for her is stuff she can wear to dance class. I assume once she wants to be dropped off at the mall and buy her own clothes with her friends, I will have to up the amount. But for now?

[kareng]

My kids didn't get much allowance until they had a reason to spend it. What do you expect her to pay for? For example: If she and her friends go to movies twice a month and walk up for ice cream a couple of times a month. Sit with her and figure out what she wants money for and how much it would be. If its reasonable, that might be the allowance amount. She can learn to budget. One month there is no movie she wants to see so she doesn't go and saves her money. next month 3 good ones are out. Does she have a chance to earn extra money? I expect my boys to help with many things at home, but if they want to do something extra, I pay them. For example, Hub likes to mow lawn and that is his job. If he is busy and one of the boys does it, they get paid $15. Going rate if it was someone else's yard for this level of service is $20. A little family discount.

I don't expect my teen boys to buy clothes. They have not wanted anything too expensive or in large quantities. Girls are probably different. 14 year olds was excited that we had a coupon at the sporting goods store & I got him 2 sets (4 pair) of "cool" and comfy socks instead of 1.

I do expect if they want to go to get ice cream after school, they pay.

I never expect them to spend their own money on the sports stuff they must have (like your dance stuff) or school necessities but when the older wanted crazy orange soccer socks and we had lots of white, black and navy - he paid or did something to pay for them.

[Juliebove]

She rarely does anything with her friends that requires money. With all the dance that she does, there is very little time for friends outside of the dance studio. Occasionally we will take friends to a movie but we pay for everyone.

There is really no place the kids can go within walking distance here. There are a few shopping centers nearby but no sidewalks so it would be very dangerous to walk there. And we live in a high crime area so up until now she hasn't been out alone. I did let her walk to her friend's house the other day to return something she had left at school. When she got home she said she had been afraid because of all the teenagers she had to pass.

Because of her other food allergies, going out for ice cream at most places is not an option.

The only things she really buys with her money are CDs, DVDs, video games and presents for people. I don't expect her to use all of her money on presents as she tends to be quite generous. I will usually pay for half of the present.

I am still working on getting her to pay for things by herself. She is extremely shy when it comes to strangers. If it is a place we go to a lot...such as the flower shop her friend's mom owns, she will pay. But at other places, she is too fearful to do it and relies on me to tell her what to do.

At the dance studio she goes to, they started a snack program where we can pay $20 at a time so that the kids can purchase snacks and drinks when we are not there. Most things cost $1. There are a few things that are $2. Because of her allergies she is limited to only the fruit snacks for food. But there are a few drinks she can buy. I didn't think she would ever approach the desk and get something, but she has gone up there if she can get someone to accompany her.

This is very different than how things were in my day. We used to walk to the store all the time. Often my mom would send us for something, perhaps just to get us out of the house. We learned how to pay for things early on.

A few weeks ago, I had been very sick. Combination of things. But I had debilitating leg cramps that I felt were due to lack of potassium. It was so bad I couldn't drive my car. I soooo wanted to give her some money and have her walk up to the new drugstore near here for a bottle of potassium. Putting the danger of the walk aside (I know other kids have done it but my husband has come close to being hit while walking that same route), I feared that she just wouldn't be able to bring herself to do it. Alas, none of her friends live close enough to us to have been able to go with her. Luckily my husband was due home the next day so I got him to take me to the store so I could get some. Seemed to do the trick.

[dilettantesteph]

I heard somewhere years ago that they should get half their grade. They also get money that goes straight into their college fund. With this money they buy things like video games. gifts, and my 15 year old daughter gets extra clothes. I buy her what she needs and she gets what she wants above that. She has gotten really good about watching for sales. She also got her own laptop with this plus birthday and Christmas money from us and from extended family. It has taught her things I didn't learn until older. My son, age 12, so far blows his money. My daughter is always saying that she should get more and that all her friends get more. Then I hear about friends who babysit and pay for everything with money that they earn. I'm not sure about how much to give either.

[buffettbride]

We give each of our kids a weekly allowance that is equal to half their age. My 12 year old gets $6 per week and my 6 year old gets $3 per week. Getting allowance depends on completion of their weekly chores so not doing chores (all of them) mean no allowance. They have to do all their chores in order to get any allowance.

[Korwyn]

From about age 2 on, I have given my daughter an allowance. I think it started at a quarter, just to teach her how to save. And I worked my way up from there. Currently she gets $5.00 per week. She is 11 but will be 12 next month. She feels she should get more. I am really not sure what is the right amount. I was thinking $6.00. She has gotten $5.00 for a couple of years.

My mom seems to think that $5.00 is waaaay too much but I am trying to be realistic. I am not really sure how much a candy bar costs these days since we don't really buy them much. When I was a kid my mom figured enough to buy a candy bar, enough to put in church and enough to save. Equally divided in thirds.

Well we don't go to church. And she doesn't really buy much. She is good to save the money and every once in a while she asks to put some in the bank. She does spend occasionally. Sometimes on toys, but mostly she has outgrown those. She does sometimes buy books, DVDs, CDs or computer games. She also get money and gift cards from relatives. Her most recent purchase was new patio chairs for me for Mother's Day.

Do you think $6 is too much? Too little? Just enough?

I was given a clothing allowance at age 13. That was back in the 70's and I think I got $30 every two weeks. Keep in mind that the very expensive jeans I chose to wear could be had for $10 a pair in those days. She hasn't shown much interest in clothing yet. Thankfully she is happy to wear whatever I find on clearance so long as it fits. She is also a dancer so most of what I buy for her is stuff she can wear to dance class. I assume once she wants to be dropped off at the mall and buy her own clothes with her friends, I will have to up the amount. But for now?

Holy Toledo! $5 a week? That is what our boys were getting when they were 18 (Our youngest turned 18 3 years ago). Well, actually it was $25 per month. But they got some deducted if they didn't do certain chores. So effectively one of them rarely got any allowance. They didn't even begin to get an allowance until they were 13. so either you are in a significantly different economic strata than we are, or we have significantly different world views. Both our boys had to pay for their own car insurance when they got their drivers licenses, and we wrote out a formal contract with our youngest son at 16 and loaned him the money for his car at interest with late payment penalties. When he graduated we wrote off the remainder of the loan as part of his graduation present. He's been working since he was 15. They also payed half the base cost of their cellphones, plus any overtime minutes or downloads. They didn't get those until they were 17.

So my vote is that $260/year for an 11-12 year old is high unless you have some significant reasons for them to get that (such as they are getting paid for doing extra chores, housework, yardwork). However we did give the boys first right of refusal on any things like getting our car washed, painting, landscaping. So any extra work they wanted to do we would pay them 85% of what we would have paid a hired help to do it if they chose (and completed it to our expectations). I arrived at the 85% based on the concept that they didn't have to pay taxes on the money or insurance, they didn't normally have the same experience or expertise, and that part of what you pay for is someones skill, not just labor. We explained this to them and they still thought it wasn't fair but that was the way it was.

There were also chores that they were expected to do that they did not get paid for as they were part of being in the family. When they turned 15 they were expected to do their own laundry, from early on all three of the kids each had a dinner night and it was their responsibility to cook dinner for the family and clean up the kitchen. Their room was their responsibility. Cleaning the bathroom and toilet, cleaning the kitchen, vacuuming, mowing the lawn, these were all expected chores but if they didn't do them (at all or on time - without prior negotiation, properly or finish them) they would get docked from their allowance. But we were always open to negotiating things. They learned to prepare and present arguments for changes in expectations, and bargain for better positions.

* Edited for clarity, additions, and to get rid of 5 times I used 'etc'

[Korwyn]

And somebody mentioned clothes. We bought their clothes, but one of boys was seriously into shoes. Skate shoes to be exact. At one point he owned more shoes than my wife did. Seriously. We counted them one time. So we bought him two pairs of regular (i.e. we decided the price range) shoes a year or as needed if he outgrew them or they just wore out, but anything else he bought or put on his birthday/Christmas list.

On a funny (to me) side note, he always had a keen sense of dress and what looked good or how to dress for any given occasion. when he was 17 we were talking about careers, and I suggested he think about fashion design or shoe design, etc. He got really huffy, and I pointed out how much money fashion designers make, or the people that design high end sport shoes, etc. He was still really huffy and annoyed at me, and I asked him why? He said, "<offended tone>I don't swing that way!", and stomped out of the room. I laughed so hard I had to sit down. He wouldn't hardly talk to me the rest of the day. :D

[sb2178]

20 years ago, I got my age + $20/month. The $20 (age 10 and up) was to cover clothing and shoes (my mother HATED shopping with a passion, even more so with a picky 10 year old that would only wear black... what can I say, I was a little odd?). I think a can of coke mostly cost about $0.50. The monthly option is good-- I think it encourages more planning and care than a weekly budget.

That covered the occasional movie, ice cream or chocolate, books (but those were mostly library'ed), CDs, presents for friend's birthdays, gifts for parents, etc. I actually saved most of it (clothing from relatives for birthdays/X-mas!) for a long time, and used it later while traveling and in college. It was great to have, especially since working in high school was not an option (rural area, limited options, would have needed a car, parents did not support a car).

Chores were sort of limited-- I did my own laundry starting about 13, helped a lot with cooking voluntarily starting about 11 (Mom worked nights for a while), had to help with random things on an as needed basis like putting up electric fences, picking apples, cleaning up after storms, or washing windows. I got out of most of the grass mowing because we lived on a very very steep hill ;-)

[Juliebove]

I do live in the Seattle area and things are probably a lot more expensive here than in some other places.

Thanks all for the suggestions!

[GlutenFreeManna]

Wow it is so interesting to read about different allowance amounts. When I was in middle school in the 80's I got $20 per week. HOWEVER, I had to pay for school lunches and most of my own clothes out of that amount. It taught me about saving up for what I wanted that's for sure. My mom did make me return a pair of designer jeans I bought one time that cost $100. Even though I bought them with my allowance money, she said that it was wasteful to pay that much when I needed new shoes and other clothes items.

[Korwyn]

When I was in school in the '80s I didn't get an allowance. I was bouncing from foster home to foster home. I got my first job when I turned 14 cutting firewood and cedar blocks during the summer, and my first two paychecks I spent on contact lenses. The state wouldn't pay for contact lenses, only glasses with the cheapest frames you could get. As soon as I turned 15 1/2 I got an 'official' job - the kind where you pay the federal government for the privilege of supporting the federal bureaucracy and being a productive member of society (income taxes).

[munchkinette]

I think it's great that you are teaching about saving. In terms of increasing allowance, what about work opportunities? I grew up in a fixer upper house that was, quite frankly, falling apart. We didn't really get a real allowance for basic chores, but my mom always gave us opportunities to earn money around the house. When we needed to paint an entire room we got $10 or $20. That was a lot when I was 12, but painting a room is a whole day of pretty physical work. We also got something like 50 cents an hour (raised when we were in high school) for yard work. I should mention that this wasn't basic lawn mowing because we lived out in the boondocks. This was pretty hard wood/brush clearing.

[Juliebove]

When I was in school in the '80s I didn't get an allowance. I was bouncing from foster home to foster home. I got my first job when I turned 14 cutting firewood and cedar blocks during the summer, and my first two paychecks I spent on contact lenses. The state wouldn't pay for contact lenses, only glasses with the cheapest frames you could get. As soon as I turned 15 1/2 I got an 'official' job - the kind where you pay the federal government for the privilege of supporting the federal bureaucracy and being a productive member of society (income taxes).

As far as home repairs and the like, I hire people to do that stuff. I am disabled and can't really do it. And because I am disabled, a lot of things around the house that I might ordinarily do, fall on her to do. So she does do a lot of work around here already.

She doesn't really have time to do extra work anyway with her dance. She has a break from that for a couple of weeks, then will be dancing for about 8 hours a day.

[WhatThe]

From about age 2 on, I have given my daughter an allowance. I think it started at a quarter, just to teach her how to save. And I worked my way up from there. Currently she gets $5.00 per week. She is 11 but will be 12 next month. She feels she should get more. I am really not sure what is the right amount. I was thinking $6.00. She has gotten $5.00 for a couple of years.

My mom seems to think that $5.00 is waaaay too much but I am trying to be realistic. I am not really sure how much a candy bar costs these days since we don't really buy them much. When I was a kid my mom figured enough to buy a candy bar, enough to put in church and enough to save. Equally divided in thirds.

Well we don't go to church. And she doesn't really buy much. She is good to save the money and every once in a while she asks to put some in the bank. She does spend occasionally. Sometimes on toys, but mostly she has outgrown those. She does sometimes buy books, DVDs, CDs or computer games. She also get money and gift cards from relatives. Her most recent purchase was new patio chairs for me for Mother's Day.

Do you think $6 is too much? Too little? Just enough?

I was given a clothing allowance at age 13. That was back in the 70's and I think I got $30 every two weeks. Keep in mind that the very expensive jeans I chose to wear could be had for $10 a pair in those days. She hasn't shown much interest in clothing yet. Thankfully she is happy to wear whatever I find on clearance so long as it fits. She is also a dancer so most of what I buy for her is stuff she can wear to dance class. I assume once she wants to be dropped off at the mall and buy her own clothes with her friends, I will have to up the amount. But for now?

I think allowance is fine, but if you do it at non-predictable intervals vs constant rate, in the long run it is usually better for both the child and the parent.

[polarbearscooby]

Dude, I never received an allowance of any kind growing up. If I wanted something really bad I could work for it, and my parents would pay me accordingly. But chores were apart of life and everyone did some and we didn't get paid for them.

My Grandma made sure from a young age I knew the value of a dollar. And I knew that if I asked for something if it was something I needed I would get it, but if it was just a 'want' I might have to wait.

Currently I do get a book allowance (apx. 30$ a month) but I baby-sit whenever needed for it...