How Can I Handle Watching People Eat All The Things I Want To Eat

[zus888]

I just started the diet on Wednesday and I'm pretty much required to attend the birthday party of my FIL who is turning 70. They have decided to go to Olive Garden, I'm assuming because they know they have gluten-free meals for me to choose from. I can handle watching everyone eat pasta while I have another dish, but it'll be the salad and breadsticks that will be my undoing. I honestly don't know how I'm not only not going to have a breadstick, but also not have one and not get upset about it.

Yes, I'm a grown up, but this is REALLY difficult for me. I actually SMELL sweet rolls and cookies even when there's no food in sight (like in my car or sitting here at my computer). My days (AND NIGHTS!!!) are spent thinking about food I can no longer have. I dream about it now! And, next weekend, I'm going to have to sit there and watch other people actually eating some really fantastic bread. And I'll be able to SMELL it. I think I might go mad. Or just have some. But that is a very slippery slope. If I give up the diet for that one time, then what's to stop me from doing it again.

This sucks. I hate it. I hate that I crave this stuff constantly and that it's all I think about. The past month has been nothing but thinking about food. At first it was shoving as much gluten-y foods into my mouth before I started the diet, and now it's all about the gluten-y foods I want, but can't have. I'm constantly DISSATISFIED! BAH!

[Stellar003]

I'm afraid I don't have anything helpful to add Suzanna, but thought I would co-miserate for a moment and admit that I actually gave the bakery the middle finger as I walked by all the goodies lol. On a positive note, I feel my energy level slowly rising....I'd rather eat foam board everyday than walk around like a zombie for another 20 years!

I hope you survive the party...and hope it helps knowing you are not alone!

Stephanie

[Jenn624]

It's almost too early in your diet for you to handle all that. I just went to the Olive Garden last week and was surprised that I was okay with not having the breadsticks, but I am almost 3 months in, not just a week or two. I don't think I could have handled it at a week or two in to the diet.

Good Luck. It will be hard, but keep trying to tell yourself that you will make yourself sicker if you eat it.

Jenn

[Diane-in-FL]

It is really hard at first. I wanted a pizza SO bad. But the cravings will go away, especially after you discover that some of the substitutes are as good. We make a homemade pizza dough that is really good. But I don't know if I could have gone to Olive Garden so soon into the diet. Actually, I haven't been there yet. I just don't trust food made by others yet.

This forum is a great place for support. Good luck to you. Don't give in to the cravings.

[GlutenFreeManna]

Olive Garden has gluten free pasta so you can have your pasta. Just make sure your waitress understands you are ordering from the gltuen free menu and that it is really important you get gluten free pasta. I have had mostly good experiences there. I had one bad experience when the waitress did not know what gluten free was and brought me out regular pasta instead. As long as your waitress knows what it means though you should be fine. The gluten-free pasta is pre-made and just reheated in a microwave so it is not in danger of being cc with allt eh gluteny stuff there. You can also have the salad. Just ask for it to be made in a clean bowl and without croutons. If the rest of your family wants croutons the server will bring a separate salad just for you OR they will offer to bring the croutons in a separate little bowl for your family to add to their salad plates. It's probably best for you to get your own salad though so no one in your party goes back for seconds and touches their crouton plate with the gluten-free salad tongs. If you are sharing salad try to get your salad out first and offer to dish out everyone elses salad so that the people that just ate breadsticks are not touching the salad tongs before you have to touch them.

[Camp Laffalot]

I am recently diagnosed, too. However, I am enjoying the adventure of new things to eat! Like Pamela's Dark Chocolate Cookies*. And Udi's breads and pizza crusts. For a quick pizza, try the Glutino Gluten Free Cheese Pizza and add your favorite veggies on top. Love the Tinkyada pasta, too.

We went out to Hooters for dinner tonight and I had 1/2 lb of steamed shrimp to peel and eat! Love going to a good steak house and not feeling guilty about ordering a juicy one with a great baked potato, and salad with oil and vinegar. There is still sooooo much we CAN have! I am just developing new favorites, like the Brown Rice Bread, toasted, with Cabot's Extra Sharp Cheddar and some really good imported orange marmalade!!!! Different and delicious!

Hey, I miss fried food, but I've already had one heart attack. And I sure would like to have a double scotch once in awhile, but I'm 22 years sober, so that's not going to happen today. Nor is smoking a cigarette for this former chain smoker. I approach every day the same: One Day At A Time!

Did I mention that I'm thinking of starting a 12-step program for addiction to Pamela's Chocolate Cookies?

Gentle hugs on ya! You can do this! Just for today, okay?

[bridgetm]

I'm nearly a year in and rarely had food jealousy after the third or fourth month. On the rare occasion that I really want what I see someone else eating, I just think of the physiological reaction that must be happening in that person's body whether they can tolerate that food group or not. Carbs? The build-up of fat cells. Greasy or fatty food? The plaque building in the arteries and the grease making its way into the system. Make yourself acknowledge only the bad parts of eating that food that was always so appetizing before going gluten-free.

[ciavyn]

The Olive Garden has one of the bread items I miss: breadsticks. So here's what I did.

I thought about all the good breadsticks I'd had. The good ones, mind you. Because there are always those ones than come out pasty and anemic. And I'd eat them anyway because I'm a carb-aholic. So then I thought about how much I didn't like the crappy ones...and really, I was lucky to get one or two decent, toasted ones when I went there anyway. Then I thought about the bloating. The bathroom runs. The pain in my stomach and lower belly. The noxious gas that embarrassed me at work and even around family members. Throwing up when I'd gotten too bloated. And I compared that misery to the taste of the breadsticks. The good and anemic breadsticks. Somehow, they weren't quite as tasty, even in person.

I don't know if that will help, but you have my sympathy. Enjoy your special salad. And remember that soon you will feel so much better. And those breadsticks are horrible for you anyway. And you are about to start trying foods you've never had that will blow your mind, and you'll be making meals, as I did this weekend when I had unexpected company, that will gain you the respect of your friends as the best cook ever. Trust me. I didn't cook. Now I do.

[Cara in Boston]

Be strong!

I know for me, if I went off the diet in front of family (they are skeptical to begin with) they would think that it is totally ok and they would't bother planning special meals that include gluten-free foods in the future. They would just assume it is a lifestyle choice, not a required change.

You can do it.

Cara

[zus888]

Yes, you are definitely right about that, Cara.

I think this whole diet would be easier if I had any symptoms of celiac that were remedied by the diet. But, I have no outward symptoms, and I'm not feeling any better (like, more energy or better brain function). I'm sure it's probably too early to notice any changes, but it's still disappointing.

[Gfreeatx]

I can totally understand where you are coming from. I was diagnosed back in August and was completely miserable for about the first three months watching others devour all of the delicious things I used to love in front of me and believing I would always feel deprived. About month four I started to realize not only how great I was feeling, but also all of the wonderful fresh food that was still available to me. I have always been a foodie, but I credit Celiac for forcing me to try new things. I'll say not all of them have been great as anyone new on the diet will tell you, but I have found some wonderful replacements for the things I once missed. You will get there, but intially it can be tough. Hang in there!

[angel9165]

I just started the diet on Wednesday and I'm pretty much required to attend the birthday party of my FIL who is turning 70. They have decided to go to Olive Garden, I'm assuming because they know they have gluten-free meals for me to choose from. I can handle watching everyone eat pasta while I have another dish, but it'll be the salad and breadsticks that will be my undoing. I honestly don't know how I'm not only not going to have a breadstick, but also not have one and not get upset about it.

Yes, I'm a grown up, but this is REALLY difficult for me. I actually SMELL sweet rolls and cookies even when there's no food in sight (like in my car or sitting here at my computer). My days (AND NIGHTS!!!) are spent thinking about food I can no longer have. I dream about it now! And, next weekend, I'm going to have to sit there and watch other people actually eating some really fantastic bread. And I'll be able to SMELL it. I think I might go mad. Or just have some. But that is a very slippery slope. If I give up the diet for that one time, then what's to stop me from doing it again.

This sucks. I hate it. I hate that I crave this stuff constantly and that it's all I think about. The past month has been nothing but thinking about food. At first it was shoving as much gluten-y foods into my mouth before I started the diet, and now it's all about the gluten-y foods I want, but can't have. I'm constantly DISSATISFIED! BAH!

I'm 6 months into the diet and sometimes I still wanna cry. The first time someone walked by me (while I held the door for them at work...I'm "lucky" enough to work across the hall from the cafeteria) with an order of lasagna and a breadstick...I cried. It was embarrassing but I couldn't help myself. It's better now but I still crave those foods I can't have...pizza, pasta, bread (& beer ...just to name a very few. I found out about my celiac looking for the reason for being anemic so I can understand your pain...it's hard to want to be good when you don't have a lot of pain being bad. This will change over time...least it has for me. I do bloat and get the big D when I've been gluten ed and that does seem to help my resolve (just a little bit). Keep your chin up and hopefully you can grin and bear it through the Olive Garden dinner. My thoughts are with you!! =)

[aeraen]

Have you tried the Brazilian Cheese rolls recipe that was posted here a couple of weeks ago? They will make you forget all about OG's breadsticks. Maybe you can make a batch (they are UBER-easy) and pop a few in a baggie in your purse.

Between OG's gluten-free pasta, a salad and your the cheese rolls, you won't be missing a thing!

I actally have sympathy for symptom-free celiacs. For those of us w/ the intestinal issues, a gluten-free way of eating is sweet freedom, where it must feel like a life sentence for those who were always symptom free.

[Takala]

Craving gluten is one of the signs of being cross contaminated with it.

If you absolutely must have bread, bring your own gluten free version. I would also bring my own gluten free cupcake or brownie for the dessert part.

The best thing to do if you are not at a restaurant that is safe to eat at, is to eat beforehand so you are not ravenously hungry.

Be forewarned that you should never use or eat melted butter type products at regular restaurants. It will not be gluten free. Even the butter that comes in little side serving dishes can be very iffy, unless it is pre wrapped individually and has the ingredients listed on it, which should be "cream and salt."

[love2travel]

I actally have sympathy for symptom-free celiacs. For those of us w/ the intestinal issues, a gluten-free way of eating is sweet freedom, where it must feel like a life sentence for those who were always symptom free.

As someone with celiac disease but asymptomatic I would agree. In ways it does indeed feel like a life sentence because I feel no different off gluten (actually I had more energy on gluten). It seems as though I have nothing to aim for (i.e. feeling better, etc.). And I love food too much! Having said that, I still will NOT cheat. Ever.

[zimmer]

As someone with celiac disease but asymptomatic I would agree. In ways it does indeed feel like a life sentence because I feel no different off gluten (actually I had more energy on gluten). It seems as though I have nothing to aim for (i.e. feeling better, etc.). And I love food too much! Having said that, I still will NOT cheat. Ever.

I'm right there with you. Could eat a whole plate of pasta & loaf of bread, and my worst symptom would be the feeling that I've eaten too much. Therefore, if it were me at the Olive Garden Party, I would eat plenty before going, and partake of the vino (and a little salad)!

[love2travel]

I'm right there with you. Could eat a whole plate of pasta & loaf of bread, and my worst symptom would be the feeling that I've eaten too much. Therefore, if it were me at the Olive Garden Party, I would eat plenty before going, and partake of the vino (and a little salad)!

Me, too! Some days on my gluten challenge I think I literally did have half a loaf of ciabatta, lots of pasta, pizza, croissants, whatever. Anything I wanted. Not a single thing happened. Not even a twitch. As I've said elsewhere here I still wonder if my surgeon got my biopsy tests right! Well, I know he did, but still.

[zus888]

I was going to take the advice and make the bread, but they've canceled the Olive Garden trip and are now having a party (dinner and dessert) at home. Great! I think I'm MORE afraid of getting glutened at someone's house than I am at a restaurant.

So, now I have traded sadness with paranoia. I can't freakin' win.

I think I'll have to fill myself up before the party. And make my own dessert. Strawberry cake?

Luckily, she went to the dietitian with me and knows how careful she needs to be. I'm very grateful for that.

[Jestgar]

So, now I have traded sadness with paranoia. I can't freakin' win.

At least you aren't stuck in a rut.

[Marz]

Glad to hear the temptation is gone I must admit there's a restaurant nearby that serves warm soft bread before the meal. I fill myself up with the smell of that divine bread, and then studiously ignore it

If you ever need to go to the Olive Garden though, some advice that I'm sure will help :

1) Don't go hungry! Eat a fruit or something before you go, so if you are tempted, it isn't hunger + temptation feeding you.

2) Bring your own snacks. Instead of breadsticks, bring a pack of chips, popcorn, cheese sticks. Maybe something crunchy and tasty to eat while everyone else is digging in will stop temptation?

3) Knowing that your family is going out of their way to accommodate you.

This is a big one for me - I can't cheat on the diet with something as silly as bread, when I know my family go out of their way to make gluten-free dishes for me. My MIL even baked me gluten-free muffins and waffles. My mom made a gluten-free Xmas cake for me last year. Cheating would be throwing that effort in their faces. I feel that it would make them think I wasn't serious about the diet, and just being "fussy". So my biggest problem is actually eating something in secret, I wouldn't do anything in front of friends or family

4) Think about the discomfort you'll get later if you're still tempted. A delicious moment on the lips vs a day in the loo and/or in pain....

Good luck with the family dinner - if you're very nervous, take a big dish with you. You can say it's to "share", but you grab a plate of your "safe" food before anyone else does. Then either ignore other dishes, take what looks safe, or just put it to the side of your plate and make it look "eaten".

It's one thing I've realised - when people eat, they don't watch what you're eating/not eating. Fill up on your safe items, and hopefully avoid CC

[Marz]

Luckily, she went to the dietitian with me and knows how careful she needs to be. I'm very grateful for that.

Sounds like you'll be fine! Your biggest culprits will be the spices she uses automatically without thinking about what's in them, and wheat flour used as a thickener in sauces if that's what she usually uses. Of course CC is also a problem - people dipping spoons into two dishes and introducing crumbs or sauces. So just ask what spices she used in a dish, if you don't know/not sure, and be rude and dish up first at dinner!

Oh, and also be wary of the family's margarine/butter/condiments - if it's a jar, it's probably not safe if people have double-dipped. If it's a squeeze bottle it should be fine as long as no-one's smeared it against a bread roll or something

[ciavyn]

Strawberry cake?! I want that recipe!!

[zus888]

I just googled "strawberry cake gluten" (without the quotes), and got a couple of recipes. I cannot attest to their taste or texture. Some call for a gluten-free all purpose flour and another lists a variety of flours.

I don't know my flours well enough to stray from a recipe. This would be my first attempt at baking gluten free and I don't have all the flours it calls for.

[killernj13]

Simple - bring your own.

[brittanymaine]

You just have to tell yourself you can't have it and deal with it. As bad as it sounds, you can't sit there wishing you could have something because there really is no way you will ever eat it again so you might as well forget about it.

Some days you will get cravings but you have to eat the foods that you are allowed and that you love