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Struggling :(


tennisman

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tennisman Contributor

(((hugs))) it's rough sometimes! it's ok to come on here and vent - nobody understands like we do, trust me. but if you need to get help to get over this bump in the road then get somebody to counsel you. NOT your "friends" - jeez... who the krap would do that... :mad:

Thanks :) I tried counseling it helped a little . I know it's really frustrating someone tried that it's things like that , which makes me wish I could pass celiac disease on to other people lol :)


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tennisman Contributor

Your description of your "friends" is frightening. I cannot fathom the absurdity of their trying to force you to consume gluten! That is NOT normal.

Others have offered excellent advice. I echo the notion that gluten-free food can be absolutely amazing. Many of the best dishes one can enjoy are naturally gluten free, anyway. It is true that there are some products out there that are absolutely deplorable. Do not feel that is all that is available! This is an entirely new opportunity to take care of yourself physically, mentally, spiritually, etc. It sure would help if you had support, though. Do NOT give up hope.

Hopefully I will find some nicer friends in the future :)

Yes there has been a lot of great advice and i'm thankful for all the great advice offered :)

tennisman Contributor

If you read you will realize there are thousands of people giving up gluten and grains for health reasons and they are empowered by their decisions. Maybe if you looked at it as a personal decision instead of a disease it might help. You could think of it as Paleo eaters do as an empowering personal choice instead of constantly thinking of it as Celiac disease that it is destroying your life. Lot's of people eat as if they are Celiac because they choose to. There are Carnivores, Paleo's, Cave Men, Low Carb, No Carb, who mainly eat meat and vegetables by choice. Granted you would have to watch cross contamination and they do not. But I think it is very empowering to read that some people are beginning to realize that a healthy diet isn't what we used to think it was. Dangerous Grains...indeed. I personally like to read Marks Daily Apple.com. I'm not perfectly paleo...but I do like to think I will get there someday soon.

I am not rcommending the Paleo/Cave man diet so much as I am recommending taking control of the personal choice to eat gluten free. Drop the alcohol, you need some good friends and a new commitment to yourself.

That's a good way at looking at the gluten free diet . But if I had the choice I would give up the gluten free diet today , I just have had lots of health problems since going on the diet . I think I am worse now than I was before being diagnosed with celiac disease :( I will look into the cave man diet , thanks for the advice :)

tennisman Contributor

I would have to agree too. That is just cruel. At least whoever did it could have offered you $1K-10K. Then you may have been in a position to 'gluten' yourself for their entertainment. ;)

All the best though. I, thankfully, have really understanding friends who I'm sure would never do such a thing. :angry:

Lol I don't think 10 K , would be enough maybe 10 million and I would think about it :P

I am glad you have understanding friends :)

tennisman Contributor

I think a lot of people that have a chronic disease or condition suffer with a bit of depression? It's also normal to greive the loss of some foods or activities...BUT it sounds like you self medicating with alcohol? That's not good!

I wonder if the "friend" who poured gluten on your food was "under the influence" or just an XXX? A person like that is not your friend!

You could start a new hobby..cooking fresh and wonderful foods. Maybe take a cooking class? Look for a celiac support group?

Some of the gluten-free versions of prepared foods are awful..so don't use them! Make your own. :D

It would be a good idea to seek some counseling or see your Dr about the depression...and we are here if you have questions, answers, or need to vent.

Good luck!

(((hugs)))

My doctor did say depression does come with a chronic disease , I just don't get why I was ok for 8 years and now I hate celiac disease . Like I mentioned above alcohol helps my stomach pain and back pain as well as my mind . By the way I haven't drank all day and have terrible back pain I took pain killers but they do nothing , a drink or 2 of cider really helps my back :D I think the person is a XXX lol.

My Mum is also a celiac so we eat lots of fresh foods . I don't have a local celiac support group :( I tried counseling it helped a little . I think I will tell my doctor how I feel and see what he suggests .

Thanks :)

tennisman Contributor

I can completely sympathize with you. I fight this almost daily.

What keeps me going? Basic desire to live I guess.

After being diagnosed in March and the rest of the crap I've been through this year I can say I will be stronger now.

I also offer my help. If you ever need to talk or live close, Message me or anything. Anytime.

It sucks doesn't it :(

Thanks :)

tennisman Contributor

I agree with the idea of taking a break from the alcohol for a while. Maybe a month or two to see how it affects you. It may have negative effects you won't recognize unless you go off it for a while and see the difference.

I'd be spittin' nails at a "friend" who tried to poison me. They wouldn't get the chance to do it again that's for sure.

There are plenty of different symptoms and reactions that food intolerances can cause in us. Our bodies are complicated things and there are a lot of interactions between stuff inside us. If you look at my signature you can see most of the things that I have learned to avoid to keep from feeling sick. You may have a similar list but haven't identified the bad foods yet. As long as you are eating a food that your body reacts to you will feel the negative affects. I keep my diet pretty simple for the most part so I don't have to spend a lot of time worrying about ingredients. Simpler is better for me at least. That means very little processed gluten-free foods, mostly home cooked meals from whole ingredients. And not eating out at restraunts much.

The thing is they messed with my food when I got up to get a drink luckily for me I could see what they were doing otherwise I may never have known and eaten the food :(

How did find out what foods affect you badly ? I have been working with a dietcian flr a year we have done plenty of food diary's but find nothing , my dietcian even gave my food diary's to colleagues of his who know a lot about food intolrences they didn't find anything I might have a problem with . I have tried eliminating foods like nightshades , dairy etc but no improvements .


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tennisman Contributor

I would like to add that alcohol can definitely cause digestive distress, and that isn't something that you need to have in your life right now. After initially going gluten free, I dropped my nightly habit for drinking wine so that my small intestine could begin healing. Also, vitamins such as folic acid, which celiacs can become deficient in, can be lowered by drinking alcohol. Your body needs to heal...and it will heal faster without the alcohol. You can always add it back in later when you're feeling better.

I live in the San Francisco Bay Area, and we have very supportive organizations and casual groups that get together at restaurants and coffee shops on a regular basis. If you're in my area, let me know...and maybe we can hook you up with some support.

I have been celiac for 8.5 years surely my intestine should have recovered by now I would have hoped . I'm waiting for results from my latest endoscopy . How long did your intestine take to heal ? Alcohol usually has good affects on me if I have alcohol my stomach pain improves :) My Mum says my great grandad used to get stomach pain and a shot of alcohol improved his stomach pain .

Cool sounds great :) Thanks for the offer but I live in England :(

love2travel Mentor

My doctor did say depression does come with a chronic disease , I just don't get why I was ok for 8 years and now I hate celiac disease . Like I mentioned above alcohol helps my stomach pain and back pain as well as my mind . By the way I haven't drank all day and have terrible back pain I took pain killers but they do nothing , a drink or 2 of cider really helps my back :D I think the person is a XXX lol.

My Mum is also a celiac so we eat lots of fresh foods . I don't have a local celiac support group :( I tried counseling it helped a little . I think I will tell my doctor how I feel and see what he suggests .

Thanks :)

I know chronic back pain having been in an accident 3 1/2 years ago and each day is a struggle. The pain is non stop as you know and it is nearly impossible to sleep due to pain in every position. I, too, have tried over 20 kinds of painkillers with zero help. I must lie down at least half the day and have extreme difficulty sitting, etc. I could not work even if I wanted to! Have you tried acupuncture? Massage? Cortisone injections? Chronic pain management doctors? Laser? Are you taking any supplements? My chronic pain management doctor has me on mega doses of magnesium glycinate, Vitamin D1, B12, B complex, zinc, malic acid, Omega 3 fatty acid from fish. If you are deficient in any of these your chronic pain can definitely increase. Have you had bloodwork done to see where your levels are?

Many people with chronic pain have depression - up to 70%. Hardly surprising when it is so hard to manage! Some days even having a shower is too painful. I also have fibromyalgia which really exacerbates things. Pain lingers on and on and on. But my husband and family are incredibly encouraging and supportive and try their best to make my life easier. It sure does help having things to look forward to on a daily basis. I have many interests. For example, getting immersed in a very good book is so freeing. No matter what I cook and bake daily - as much as I can handle. Sure, I have to do prep, lie down, cut the meat, lie down, make the sauce, lie down...it takes me about five times longer than others to do it but I do it! Gardening is another passion. Can't do much obviously but would perhaps growing some herbs interest you? It is fun to watch things grow (then eat it later). Is there anything you have been itching to do but putting off? It sure helps to have that sense of accomplishment! Even small things can seem like big things and can be incredibly gratifying.

I find it really helps to get the focus off myself and onto other people and things. I volunteer at a shelter when I can. Not often, but the odd time. Helping others is useful to them and to yourself. It is even possible to forget the pain for a few minutes when you are immersed in something like that.

All the best of luck with this. :)

oceangirl Collaborator

Hi Tennisman from England!

I am wondering now after reading your recent posts if the Paleo diet might help a bit? I found after YEARS (5) of a DETAILED food and symptom log that there were many things I had issues with-food! But now, 6 years in, I am ALMOST Paleo (I eat dairy now, so no...). I don't tolerate grains in general very well so they are markedly absent from my diet. You may want to check the Paleo out.

Also: if you are having a glass or 2 of wine or cider a day and not frolicking in alcohol, I have to say that wine does make my symptoms and digestion better- But, in moderation! So... if you don't feel alcohol is a problem for you and I think people with issues often subconsciously know they have issues; if it is not interfering with your life (these are BIG questions), then I understand the self-medicating thing, for sure. YIKES! We're not supposed to admit that people abuse drugs typically because drugs often make us FEEL BETTER! The question remains as to where you are on that spectrum so others' advice to you from this board should be weighed most honestly. I do think that alcohol is a potentially destructive legal drug and I say that knowing intimately people who cannot have alcohol and the terrible wake left by alcohol and other drug abuse. But I also think that there are those who can use a substance responsibly to gain its myriad benefits. Looking at all you have written, I am not sure where you are in that mix and only YOU can decide if you need to make a serious change.

Blah, blah... I'm going on and on...

I do hope you find ways to become more proactive and positive with your life and begin to feel much better soon!

Best wishes from just across the pond in Maine,

lisa

Googles Community Regular

I'm sorry you are having so much trouble. I agree that those "friends" aren't. One thing to keep in mind with your drinking is that alcohol itself is a depressant. While it may make you feel better in the short term, it can make you feel worse later. Then you end up wanting to drink more to get that feeling back, but it once again leads you to feeling worse (more depressed).

I know you said that you went to a counselor before, but it might be good to go back again. There are different stages of acceptance/grief, and you can go back and forth between them. It sounds like you could use some more support right now.

GFinDC Veteran

The thing is they messed with my food when I got up to get a drink luckily for me I could see what they were doing otherwise I may never have known and eaten the food :(

How did find out what foods affect you badly ? I have been working with a dietcian flr a year we have done plenty of food diary's but find nothing , my dietcian even gave my food diary's to colleagues of his who know a lot about food intolrences they didn't find anything I might have a problem with . I have tried eliminating foods like nightshades , dairy etc but no improvements .

Hi Tennisman,

I found my other food intolerances by doing an elimination diet. Actually 3 separate ones because I quit too soon after find the f the first problem food. So I just ended up starting another elimination diet later. Actually I consider myself to be on an extended elimination diet always. I try new foods but don't add more than one new food/product a day usually. That way if I have a problem I know what caused it.

moose07 Apprentice

I know this is easier said than done but you need to find some new people to be around. I have issues with people not understanding my celiacs too but if any anyone tried to purposely put gluten in my food I would probably cut them out of my life. That sounds harsh but taking care of yourself is important and if your friends can't deal with that than they are not real friends. Sorry you are going through that!

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