Hannah H

Amy Winehouse, Jim Morrison, Jimi Hendrix and Brian Jones all died at the age of 27. Justin Bieber turns 27 in 2021. Patience...

Just heard an argument against male birth control that 'we can't expect men to remember to take it.' Oh so we're only supposed to depend on women to remember to take their medicine? Not sure I understand the logic on this one....

I'm thinking about starting a line of realistic welcome mats with things like "Please don't stay long!" or "I hope you brought booze."

If your plan A doesn’t work, don’t sweat it....The alphabet has 25 more letters.

Time to do bad things...True Blood time, hooker!

Had an amazing time last night! Chillaxin' at home today...Happy Sunday, everyone!

Umm...5 shots and 3 drinks before 8pm was a good...I mean bad idea.

And the McGriddles have started...

I hate when I'm making a milkshake & boys randomly show up in my yard...

Since my Thirsty Wednesday was a little more thirsty than I anticipated...I'm relaxing tonight. DVR + my ass on the couch = heaven!

Google, I don't need you to tell me how quickly (.15 seconds) you found the results. Relax. You got the job.

Mmmm...garbanzo beans for lunch. What the hell is wrong with me?!

Just saw a guy using a payphone. I can only assume he’s being told where to deliver the ransom money.

Yay! Just finished a successful gluten-free Japanese restaurant meal! Thanks to Fire & Sticks Japanese Steakhouse and Sushi for being so accommodating to my crazy dietary needs! It was delicious!

Damn you, garbanzo beans! Why must you be so delicious?!

If the US defaults, will China repossess our elected officials?...Just thinking out loud here.

Loading a full dishwasher is like the grown up version of Tetris.

Oh My Godric! True Blood time....

It is definitely hotter than 40 whores in a pecker patch today.

Wow, what is it with amazing musicians dying at 27...Jim Morrison, Janis Joplin, Jimi Hendrix, and Kurt Cobain...now add Amy Winehouse to that list.

Some girls should EAT make-up so they can be pretty on the inside.

There are times, Duran Duran, when I actually am "hungry like the wolf". But thanks to you jerks I can't tell anyone without sounding stupid.

My hand sanitizer smells like vodka. This gives me an idea! ........OK, that wasn't a very good idea.

On my first day of school my parents dropped me off at the wrong nursery. There I was… surrounded by trees and bushes.

Attn Coors Light… Please stop advertising how cold your beers are, that is not caused by some magic voodoo you do, it is caused by whether or not you remember to put them in a refridgerator.